Dissociative identity disorders (DID) from vicious childhood abuse

No problem, Colleen, I was horrified I left that impression. We have to keep ourselves safe at all times. Bye again, giggling harder.
I hate packing!!!!!!

@brightwings I abhor unpacking so never go anyplace that requires packing...grin. Enjoy.

@colleenyoung I know I was only being silly in tagging you. Thanks for clarifying and doing your job. Things have been so dark and scary lately needed to lighten up. Would that I could do more physically and enjoy nature. The flowers will suffice. Reality is too real for now.

Part of my not packing is respecting it is darned hot out there. Once I get there I will stay for at least 24 hours so staying in the cool right now.
I am excited to go there. There is A GRAND ADVENTURE just in the planning stages starting. Some folks are wanting to leave their homes and go traveling thru to where ever we go. I want to be in on that.
I have know for years I would spend a year traveling thru the states. Maybe this is the start. Who knows. I have been camping since age 6. Love it. Took my kids all over this country.
Bye again bright wings

Checking in after Sacred Ceremony..I got home from the Sacred Ceremony around 2 pm on Monday. I have never stayed this long before. There was such a nice bunch of people I hooked up with, we only chose to leave when we ran out of food and cigarettes.
58 people attended the ceremony with so many new folks.
For my intention or goal, I shared thru the Sacred Plant Medicine I have now achieved my life long goal. To completely erase all the effects of my abuse. I wasn't planning on sharing that but it went with the real intention which is to build a new foundation that is solid and will expand with me in my new life.
So many people came up to me, thanking me for my sharing with them. I am better at receiving complements now than I was in the past. I no longer throw them away but take them in and cherish them.
This was my 15th Peyote Ceremony in about 2 years. I know I was lead there by the Lord. I am so grateful.
While I had the talking feather, after debating for a long time, I decided to share something dear to my heart. I shared about my favorite son in the world. I want to bring him to America.
I met him at the mission I was working at in Kenya for 6 months. His parents both died of aids. He was the most broken hearted boy when I met him. Oh we shared some happy memories the time we shared together.
I shared my goal of raising $600 to get him a passport. Later I was given money but chose not to count it. It was bunches of bills. It turned out to be $450. I cried!!!
This young person I adopted as a child of my heart so long ago (2010) never forgot me and I never Forgot him. I chose to give him an education at the finest university in Kenya. He can not get a job because he doesn't have the money to pay the Graff necessary to even talk about a job.
I had been wondering if God was in this, I really believe he is now. I will not share with Francis how much money I raised. I told him he has to earn the money so in our last messenger conversation he told me, if he had money for seeds, he would raise tomatoes and cucumbers to earn the money.
I have more healing to share but will continue in the morning. Bye,
peaceful bright wings

Please forgive me My absence. I have intensive healing going on in my brain. I asked for the Sacred Plant Medicine to rewire my brain. BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU ASK FOR!!!
LOng story short, today I can smell the pan I cooked a celebration steak in last night. I have not been able to smell for 30 years or longer. Sleeping twice as much.
Rejoice with me. Bright Wings
I shall return!

We are struggling to work as one. Not working well for now. I am so afraid of the new doctor. I won’t talk to her she is scary.

I'm sorry to hear that, @parus. Sometimes just thinking about the past and the frightening things that occured can be scary just in themselves.

Is there anything about her in particular that frightens you, such as her tone of voice/manner of speech, something about her appearance, mannerisms that might remind you of someone harmful in your past? Sending you peace and hope today.

@parus

I'm sorry to see that your doctor is not compatible for you. Is she a therapist, psychiatrist, or physician? I know i have had to try more than one therapist and physician in the past as i just couldn't open up to some of them. To me, when you feel that way it's your intuition telling you that you're not ready for issues she may want you to explore. It's OK and you should pay attention to your feelings. Look for another person to talk to if you can. First, you must feel safe before you can explore, and clearly you don't with her. Please trust yourself, and feel better.

I have taken clomipramine/anafranil for almost 30 years, to treat an anxiety disorder related to OCD. I have now worked on getting off the medication, with the support of my doctor and seem happy with that decision. My question is, after being on the medication for so many years, how long will the various withdrawal symptoms last? I have heard and read on some sites that ?being on an antidepressant for an extended period can impact on the length of time the symptoms last.
AJ