Clinical Depression

Posted by maw258 @maw258, Fri, Jun 21 11:31am

I have all but a couple of symptoms listed under Clinical Depression. Due to my age, I'm not open to starting on an anti-depressant for help with it because of the statistics sighting possible cause of early dementia onset as an affect from the meds. I believe I do know what threw me INTO this state of being but since it is my family and my career there's not much I can do to remove the stress and causes. Hoping someone out there has some suggestions on how to deal and get my health and character back. I'm 61 and feel 91. I want to live … I want my joy back …

Liked by kamama94

Oh my Lord. kamama94. Reading your post made me gasp and I literally felt tears well up just reading your experiences. Much of what you describe is so similar to my own life. I've never suffered depression though I HAVE been depressed for short periods of times brought on by life circumstances. This time is different. You mentioned fibro. To ME, fibromyalgia is a new term the medical world developed when someone is in pain in all different areas of their bodies with no known diagnosis'. So it's name is fibro. I researched where it too comes along that list of clinical depression symptoms. I eat Advil most days for some area of pain and use CBD oil for internal inflammation control as well. I'm fairly desperate it sounds. I've reached out through my cardiologist and my PCP inquiring about Wellbutrin and/or Cymbalt both extended release. I have taken 0.5mg Xanax 3 x daily for more years than I even know. I just figure I will be on them forever so not concerned with going through withdrawals coming off of it although I'd be too afraid to TRY I would wonder if I could get by without Xanax if I started an SSRI. I took Prozac one time for about 3-5mo back in 2002 and although I did SUPER on it and it controlled my anxiety too so I didn't use Xanax but, I GAINED 30+LBS during that time as well, however it was during the time my Mother got sick too. Anyway. Just finding this online support group has already helped me more than any therapy session I went to. I think I am ready to at least attempt an RX and just see how it works for me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Your recap is heartbreaking and makes my recap seem so much less. I am so sorry for all you've endured.

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@maw258, how kind of you to say such nice things. I confess, there are a few sore places in my "heart" I still cannot touch very often or very long but I also have learned to find great joy in many things – a green blade of grass, a bird's wing, a great-grandson's smile, the love of family and friends, the ceremonies of my people. . . the list is endless.

I also want to tell you I tried Wellbutrin when I decided to quit smoking (again! second time around) and experienced a couple of very mild seizures so stopped taking it. I got headaches on Prozac. Others may not experience ANY such side effects, though.
You might want to check with your pharmacist about continuing Xanax but gradually tapering off while starting Wellbutrin or Cymbalta. I have found that pharmacists, when they're not swamped, are wonderful sources of drug information.

To me, fibromyalgia is a "real" illness. Neuromuscular connections really can get scrambled, especially after an injury, even a minor one. The pain and the burning and the deadening fatigue are real. Stretching, meditation, acupuncture, trigger point release, dietary changes – all have helped me cope with mine.

I can relate to the weight gain as well. Steroids for COPD and type two diabetes pack a hefty one-two punch, therefore, I am hefty! And can't lose easily.

And let me say that pain is pain. The exact nature of our griefs and losses may be different for each of us but each person's are as important to him or to her as anybody else's pain. You have had and are having a difficult time. What you're going through or what I'm going through need not be compared.

Finally, I would like to share that the most non-pharmaceutical help I ever received was through a co-dependent recovery program. I am not saying anyone else is co-dependent but I certainly was and still am somewhat but getting better every day. It helped me learn to cope with my own feelings when people did something I didn't like – like die. (No, I'm not joking. How dare they?)

It speaks well of you that you have reached out and are ready to take some action. I send you blessings and wishes for healing.

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@maw258

Oh my Lord. kamama94. Reading your post made me gasp and I literally felt tears well up just reading your experiences. Much of what you describe is so similar to my own life. I've never suffered depression though I HAVE been depressed for short periods of times brought on by life circumstances. This time is different. You mentioned fibro. To ME, fibromyalgia is a new term the medical world developed when someone is in pain in all different areas of their bodies with no known diagnosis'. So it's name is fibro. I researched where it too comes along that list of clinical depression symptoms. I eat Advil most days for some area of pain and use CBD oil for internal inflammation control as well. I'm fairly desperate it sounds. I've reached out through my cardiologist and my PCP inquiring about Wellbutrin and/or Cymbalt both extended release. I have taken 0.5mg Xanax 3 x daily for more years than I even know. I just figure I will be on them forever so not concerned with going through withdrawals coming off of it although I'd be too afraid to TRY I would wonder if I could get by without Xanax if I started an SSRI. I took Prozac one time for about 3-5mo back in 2002 and although I did SUPER on it and it controlled my anxiety too so I didn't use Xanax but, I GAINED 30+LBS during that time as well, however it was during the time my Mother got sick too. Anyway. Just finding this online support group has already helped me more than any therapy session I went to. I think I am ready to at least attempt an RX and just see how it works for me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Your recap is heartbreaking and makes my recap seem so much less. I am so sorry for all you've endured.

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@maw258 Start slow with your meds. And remember that it may take a while the see the final positive results. Document your journey, that is, keep track of how you feel, and you might find that writing out your thoughts and feelings will help tremendously! Also, remember we are here for you. We care.
Ginger

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@maw258

Yes, therapy was ok. Perhaps I just wasn't fortunate enough to find THE right professionals I needed. One reason I joined this group! I had alot of things happen in a fairly short period of time; family issues, marital, illnesses, caregiving, deaths. I THOUGHT I was handling it all ok, realizing it was alot, but I've always been a strong character and strong in my faith in God. This last even happened during 2018 and ultimately ended in yet another death. I'm alone most of the time other than the weekdays while I'm at work. It's like my office and my house are my safe places and I reallyyyyy hate that part. Limits me terribly. Thank you for replying though. I'm going to reach out to my cardiologist and PCP to get their opinions; both are aware of all I've gone through and continue to go through.

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@maw258 , I think that it's a great idea to reach out to your physician(s) to get opinions on your concerns, but ultimately the decision will be up to you. I was not aware of the possible association between onset dementia and anti-depressants, and it's something that I will read up on for myself. My quality of life is so improved by taking medication that I'm also going to ask my psychiatrist about this next time I see her. As an aside, and really coming back to your original post, I also use Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to cope with my depression and anxiety symptoms that still occur, by directing my thoughts, realizing when I'm making mental leaps or errors, I find that it helps me a lot to cope with my problems. I also have my "safe" place of work, when I'm busy and my mind is not so prone to take me where I don't want to go, and I wish that it wasn't that way; leaving me to find some other coping skills to expand my experiences feeling happy.

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@guener

@maw258 , I think that it's a great idea to reach out to your physician(s) to get opinions on your concerns, but ultimately the decision will be up to you. I was not aware of the possible association between onset dementia and anti-depressants, and it's something that I will read up on for myself. My quality of life is so improved by taking medication that I'm also going to ask my psychiatrist about this next time I see her. As an aside, and really coming back to your original post, I also use Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to cope with my depression and anxiety symptoms that still occur, by directing my thoughts, realizing when I'm making mental leaps or errors, I find that it helps me a lot to cope with my problems. I also have my "safe" place of work, when I'm busy and my mind is not so prone to take me where I don't want to go, and I wish that it wasn't that way; leaving me to find some other coping skills to expand my experiences feeling happy.

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Very well-said! Cognitive Behavioral Therapy works!

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Good morning to you all. I've sent word to my PCP regarding my new decision to finally reach out and ask for Rx help with my life……something I haven't been open to until now. You all have been such an amazing help to me even in the short amount of time I've been in here. Far more than any therapy session in person! I confidentially reached out to a couple of very close trustworthy people in my circle and lo and behold was privately told by all of them they too had to reach out for Rx help and they ALL got straightened out and are finally able to enjoy life once again and RECOGNIZE their joy has been right in front of them the whole time they were just too mentally/physically disturbed to grab hold of it but now with a little help getting their brain functioning correctly again they are basically 100% renewed. I'm doubting my PCP of 40yrs will prescribe the antidepressant to me without an office visit simply to walk in, repeat my message to him, get the script and walk out and pay out of pocket expense for it but I'm hoping he will. I just visited him January 30, 2019 did completed labwork and ekg and everything of course was NORMAL as always which I'm grateful for but still felt and feel so horribly lousy. Am awaiting his response currently, and impatiently. Just wanted to thank you ALL again.

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@maw258

Good morning to you all. I've sent word to my PCP regarding my new decision to finally reach out and ask for Rx help with my life……something I haven't been open to until now. You all have been such an amazing help to me even in the short amount of time I've been in here. Far more than any therapy session in person! I confidentially reached out to a couple of very close trustworthy people in my circle and lo and behold was privately told by all of them they too had to reach out for Rx help and they ALL got straightened out and are finally able to enjoy life once again and RECOGNIZE their joy has been right in front of them the whole time they were just too mentally/physically disturbed to grab hold of it but now with a little help getting their brain functioning correctly again they are basically 100% renewed. I'm doubting my PCP of 40yrs will prescribe the antidepressant to me without an office visit simply to walk in, repeat my message to him, get the script and walk out and pay out of pocket expense for it but I'm hoping he will. I just visited him January 30, 2019 did completed labwork and ekg and everything of course was NORMAL as always which I'm grateful for but still felt and feel so horribly lousy. Am awaiting his response currently, and impatiently. Just wanted to thank you ALL again.

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WTG!

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@maw258

Good morning to you all. I've sent word to my PCP regarding my new decision to finally reach out and ask for Rx help with my life……something I haven't been open to until now. You all have been such an amazing help to me even in the short amount of time I've been in here. Far more than any therapy session in person! I confidentially reached out to a couple of very close trustworthy people in my circle and lo and behold was privately told by all of them they too had to reach out for Rx help and they ALL got straightened out and are finally able to enjoy life once again and RECOGNIZE their joy has been right in front of them the whole time they were just too mentally/physically disturbed to grab hold of it but now with a little help getting their brain functioning correctly again they are basically 100% renewed. I'm doubting my PCP of 40yrs will prescribe the antidepressant to me without an office visit simply to walk in, repeat my message to him, get the script and walk out and pay out of pocket expense for it but I'm hoping he will. I just visited him January 30, 2019 did completed labwork and ekg and everything of course was NORMAL as always which I'm grateful for but still felt and feel so horribly lousy. Am awaiting his response currently, and impatiently. Just wanted to thank you ALL again.

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@maw258 Good for you for reaching out and finding us! Congratulations on being open-minded and reading what we had to say and making a decision that you are comfortable with. I think I speak for everyone here that we are very happy that we were able to give you some insight to what has worked for us. And I know that we all hope you have success and that you will come back and keep us informed to what works for you and what works and what doesn't. Remember that it's a journey.
Ginger

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@maw258

Good morning to you all. I've sent word to my PCP regarding my new decision to finally reach out and ask for Rx help with my life……something I haven't been open to until now. You all have been such an amazing help to me even in the short amount of time I've been in here. Far more than any therapy session in person! I confidentially reached out to a couple of very close trustworthy people in my circle and lo and behold was privately told by all of them they too had to reach out for Rx help and they ALL got straightened out and are finally able to enjoy life once again and RECOGNIZE their joy has been right in front of them the whole time they were just too mentally/physically disturbed to grab hold of it but now with a little help getting their brain functioning correctly again they are basically 100% renewed. I'm doubting my PCP of 40yrs will prescribe the antidepressant to me without an office visit simply to walk in, repeat my message to him, get the script and walk out and pay out of pocket expense for it but I'm hoping he will. I just visited him January 30, 2019 did completed labwork and ekg and everything of course was NORMAL as always which I'm grateful for but still felt and feel so horribly lousy. Am awaiting his response currently, and impatiently. Just wanted to thank you ALL again.

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Thank you for your kind words and thoughts. We are all here to help one another and are glad you are finding what you need.

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Anddddddddd furthermore MY PCP AGREED TO CALL THE RX IN WITHOUT ME MAKING AN OFFICE VISIT APPOINTMENT!!!!!!! IT HAS TO BE THE RIGHT THING TO DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm soooooooo ready for it to be ready!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I guess everyone is different on what time of day you take an antidepressant? Morning? Night? I have no idea what to even expect! Is it normal to be THIS excited????????????????? LOL. I consider you all my new friends!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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@maw258

Anddddddddd furthermore MY PCP AGREED TO CALL THE RX IN WITHOUT ME MAKING AN OFFICE VISIT APPOINTMENT!!!!!!! IT HAS TO BE THE RIGHT THING TO DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm soooooooo ready for it to be ready!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I guess everyone is different on what time of day you take an antidepressant? Morning? Night? I have no idea what to even expect! Is it normal to be THIS excited????????????????? LOL. I consider you all my new friends!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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@maw258 hopefully the prescription will state the time to take it. Generally doctors recommend morning because some antidepressants can cause problems with sleep when first taken. I have no problems with mine and I take all of mine before I go to bed. Please be aware as others have stated that antidepressants can take 6 weeks to take full effect. They have a relatively long half-life so they do build up in you over time.
I am glad you found us here.

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@maw258

Anddddddddd furthermore MY PCP AGREED TO CALL THE RX IN WITHOUT ME MAKING AN OFFICE VISIT APPOINTMENT!!!!!!! IT HAS TO BE THE RIGHT THING TO DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm soooooooo ready for it to be ready!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I guess everyone is different on what time of day you take an antidepressant? Morning? Night? I have no idea what to even expect! Is it normal to be THIS excited????????????????? LOL. I consider you all my new friends!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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wow!

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@maw258

Yes, therapy was ok. Perhaps I just wasn't fortunate enough to find THE right professionals I needed. One reason I joined this group! I had alot of things happen in a fairly short period of time; family issues, marital, illnesses, caregiving, deaths. I THOUGHT I was handling it all ok, realizing it was alot, but I've always been a strong character and strong in my faith in God. This last even happened during 2018 and ultimately ended in yet another death. I'm alone most of the time other than the weekdays while I'm at work. It's like my office and my house are my safe places and I reallyyyyy hate that part. Limits me terribly. Thank you for replying though. I'm going to reach out to my cardiologist and PCP to get their opinions; both are aware of all I've gone through and continue to go through.

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Hello @maw258,

I have been reading your posts and the posts of others in the Connect community and I see that you are getting some very caring responses to your problems. Since part of your experience was the death of a loved one, I'd like to invite you to join our discussion on Loss and Grief. Here is the link to take you to these discussions, https://connect.mayoclinic.org/group/loss-grief//
Just click on the link and read and join in the discussions about grief. I think you will be helped by this as well.

Have you been part of a grief support group yet? If not, that might be a good first step.

I'm looking forward to hearing from you again.

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@maw258

Anddddddddd furthermore MY PCP AGREED TO CALL THE RX IN WITHOUT ME MAKING AN OFFICE VISIT APPOINTMENT!!!!!!! IT HAS TO BE THE RIGHT THING TO DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm soooooooo ready for it to be ready!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I guess everyone is different on what time of day you take an antidepressant? Morning? Night? I have no idea what to even expect! Is it normal to be THIS excited????????????????? LOL. I consider you all my new friends!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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@maw258 I,ve been following all the post to you and am glad you reached out to your Dr. The prescription will tell you when to take it if not call the pharmacist they know more about medicines then Dr,s since they are Dr,s also. Take them one day at a time and don't expect results after one pill it will take at least a week before you see and feel significantly better . Happy for you

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Hi, @maw258 – how are you doing? How has it gone being back on an antidepressant? What medication did the doctor prescribe for you?

@kamama94 – you mentioned having had some side effects with fluoxetine (Prozac) and also bupropion (Wellbutrin). Have you been taking anything else instead?

Liked by johnhans, kamama94

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