I was recently diagnosed with cancer. I was oddly casual about the diagnosis initially. I just needed time for it to sink in. At first I was eager to get it outta me asap. Yes, surgery! The sooner the better! Then the reality of the recovery process hit me. I would not be able to complete all the bathroom updates that had already been started prior to the cancer derailment. Cancer treatment would render me useless for longer than I could accept. What about funds? Now I was looking at reallocating all the time AND money saved for the projects to cancer treatment. Not OK! There is a mess and debris and so much work still to do before I have a bathroom suitable for recovery. Time and health and finances now a trifecta of what I call “cancermania”. I have a husband and two teenage children. Cancermania has no regard for their need for time to accept and adjust to mom’s fate and how it will affect the dynamics of home life. Cancermania demands attention and will terrorize those closest to it to immediate action as proof of love and care. It’s a close cousin to “Bridezilla” in behavior. I suppose I could go on medication to numb me out and make me more docile. I’ve been sober from drugs and alcohol for 22 years without issue. Should I let cancer derail that too? I usually pray and meditate and that was enough. Cancermania seems to be unaffected by these efforts releasing an unbridled rage at the absurdity of the timing of it all. Am I alone in this emotional bog?