Being Old With Chronic Pain plus Loneliness

Posted by Parus @parus, Jul 17, 2017

One who does not believe in the medical realm or much of any thing else having some magical, lasting cure. Healing comes from within for some.

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@parus

The chronic, extreme pain is wearing me down..Can’t change it, can’t fix it. Such a noisy world we live in!

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@parus

The pain is so severe today. Can only do the best I can to ride it out. Doctor in the morning. Dubious as to any answers. Very discouraged and so alone in all of this struggle. Sorry for others adrift on the chronic pain boat. Has to be some kind of answer-surely there must be. Crying surely does not help.

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There are likely some types of pain from which there is no relief. At times I keep going because I am mule-headed. I am not having physical pain. This pain is not real and I shall overcome-or not. Anger can be a positive motivator at times. Then there is the aftermath to deal with. I have had so much trouble with medications that I am dreadfully fearful of trying another. I abhor disappointment and the feeling I have failed because what helps others harms me.
Not much help here.

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@parus

To whomever-there is nothing more debilitating that being nothing more than a burden on society. I see myself as a useless piece of crap. Had an appointment w/ PCP this morning-a total disaster and it was not even my fault. Computers/keyboards failing. All of the noise sent me into PTSD. Final outcome-BP through the roof and being prescribed a BP med. Thank you technology for what you have done to my psyche. If I were a horse I would have been shot long ago. Yes, I am in a horrid place!!! Have to take another inappropriate med or be w/o a PCP. No need trying to explain or I will be locked up in a loony bin and forced to take poison.
So sorry. I am so discouraged and feeling so all alone. Oh please God, I can take no more of this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Im so sorry how you feel today Pain is so debilitating and that Dr.is a jerk .I,ve had days like this instead of feeling sorry for myself I take a hot tub bath with music on and soak for awhile.It helps to use Epsom Salts and some drops of Lavender oil in the water.Whatever pain pill you have take it ,relax then in tub.This to shall pass,feel better

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@parus

The pain is so severe today. Can only do the best I can to ride it out. Doctor in the morning. Dubious as to any answers. Very discouraged and so alone in all of this struggle. Sorry for others adrift on the chronic pain boat. Has to be some kind of answer-surely there must be. Crying surely does not help.

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@kjnor

Would you tell us more about what medications you’ve tried? I take a few for periodic low back pain and peripheral neuropathy pain in my feet, and had a spinal cord stimulator implant in June last year. It’s really helped. Different meds work for different people. I use a prescription lidocaine cream on my feet at bedtime when they are hurting. It numbs the pain long enough to get to sleep.

I hope you find something that helps you.

Jim

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I am 84 yo and find myself so isolated people are people but many are prejudiced and make friends w those who speak their language the place I live in was once restricted to people over 55 then a new owner bought the mobile home park and since then the families who bought houses are almost 100 % Spanish speaking and some don’t even speak English. I am college educated.have a master of Science degree inAdult and
Community Education and am a former Native New Yorker. I am finding it so hard to communicate with neighbors especially on an intellectual level I am not interested in gossip re neighbors business and although I attend an exercise class 3 x a week land have reached out to others in an attempt to develop friends it has not happened I have only one sibling who lives in another state and no relatives in the state in which I now reside. I love jazz,photography and reading. I am not comfortable attending large parties,etc as I am afraid of social rejection. I am a member of a. Minority group both racially and sexually (lesbian) and know what it feels like to be unfairly judged by others. I am decent, lovable and neat. I just can’t seem to fit in. It’s a. B.

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Me too. I have just read about a cream that is supposed to get rid of pain. I think ordered some and thought it did not work. I will try it again and let you know if it works.

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@kjnor

Me too. I have just read about a cream that is supposed to get rid of pain. I think ordered some and thought it did not work. I will try it again and let you know if it works.

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@kjnor

I\'m not sure where your response is directed. I have peripheral neuropathy pain in my feet, and when it\'s bad I put prescription lidocaine cream on the areas that burn and hurt. It numbs them for awhile. I usually use it at bedtime so I can get to sleep. I think I tried Arnica cream a few times, and I think it helped some, but not as much as the lidocaine. For arthritis pain, Volteran gel has helped, and I know a woman who swears by blue emu.

What is it that you\'re trying, and what pain are you treating?

Jim

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@audreyb

I am 84 yo and find myself so isolated people are people but many are prejudiced and make friends w those who speak their language the place I live in was once restricted to people over 55 then a new owner bought the mobile home park and since then the families who bought houses are almost 100 % Spanish speaking and some don’t even speak English. I am college educated.have a master of Science degree inAdult and
Community Education and am a former Native New Yorker. I am finding it so hard to communicate with neighbors especially on an intellectual level I am not interested in gossip re neighbors business and although I attend an exercise class 3 x a week land have reached out to others in an attempt to develop friends it has not happened I have only one sibling who lives in another state and no relatives in the state in which I now reside. I love jazz,photography and reading. I am not comfortable attending large parties,etc as I am afraid of social rejection. I am a member of a. Minority group both racially and sexually (lesbian) and know what it feels like to be unfairly judged by others. I am decent, lovable and neat. I just can’t seem to fit in. It’s a. B.

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@audreyb

I apologise for the delay in responding to your note. I'm kind of behind schedule, and the posts are piling up.

I'm also a native New Yorker and college educated. My degree is in music with a piano focus. Actually I have a double degree, the other half is theology. My wife is a native Californian, who has a Math degree from Cal Berkeley.

I'll be 67 for a few more months, but I've been retired for 12 years. I had to retire at 55 because of depression, anxiety, PTSD and multiple suicide attempts. I checked myself into a facility that was brand new, built for treatment of people like me who were suicide attempt survivors. I was there for 6 weeks – they weren't really happy that I stayed that long, but I was so far down that I knew if I went home any sooner, I wouldn't have been alive much longer.

So, I had to retire because I was too disabled to do my job. I was a minister of music for 25 years, then a pastor for ten. Two years before I retired, it was fortunate that we bought a home on ten acres in the country. We sold a home we had bought in 1976 in Merced, CA. Having held onto it for 28 years, renting it to friends, we made enough to roll the profit over to a property, rented it out for two years, then we retired and moved here, mortgage free. I don't know how we could survive if we had a mortgage. Social Security doesn't make a person rich, does it.

I'm blessed to have a quiet place to live. There's a lot of work to take care of the place, but it's well worth it. If I die before my wife, she'll have to sell the place and move to town. She's never pushed a lawn mower and isn't interested in learning how. I'm glad to have a riding mower. Because of neuropathy, I couldn't walk behind a mower to mow the lawns.

It's time for me to get to sleep, so I can't write more tonight. I'll try to be more prompt in my responses in the future.

Jim

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@catgic

Parus (@parus) – RE: Being Old With Chronic Pain plus Loneliness…Anyone else in the same boat?

Old? I sign up to that…with 76 trips around the sun. FWIW FYI: Getting old is the natural sequential order of living things. Nobody gets off the planet alive.
Chronic pain? No “Show Stopper Levels” here, only normal day-to-day aches and pains associated with being reminded that I am vintage.
Loneliness? One is the loneliest number that you’ll ever do. As for me, I, personally, have never been lonely, either when alone or in a crowd.

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Loneliness chronic pain and depression are a trio of killers. Having lived through all three I feel it's appropriate to comment. I recently found the last key to my depression was exercise and I've returned to the gym on an almost daily basis to use what's called a nustep machine. That is the proper spelling. It's a cross trainer that you sit on and it creates no pain in my back and that's the chronic long-lasting pain that I suffer from the most. So it's just the ticket. My dogs and my son help with loneliness and I also make a point of almost daily trips to the grocery store where I visit with the Butcher and the vegetable kid and the ladies at the checkout. fortunately I still have my wife and my adult son who has Down syndrome lives at home with me and I'm as caretaker. Today we're going to St Paul to meet my son and his wife that is my second son and his wife to have lunch in a Mexican market should be a great time. As I said the gym was the last step in dealing with depression. I also use a couple of meds see a psychologist and keep as busy as my physical condition will allow me. Participating in this group is also helpful especially answering other people's comments. It is tough to see what bad places other people are stuck in. My heart goes out. Love & blessings to you all

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@catgic

Parus (@parus) – RE: Being Old With Chronic Pain plus Loneliness…Anyone else in the same boat?

Old? I sign up to that…with 76 trips around the sun. FWIW FYI: Getting old is the natural sequential order of living things. Nobody gets off the planet alive.
Chronic pain? No “Show Stopper Levels” here, only normal day-to-day aches and pains associated with being reminded that I am vintage.
Loneliness? One is the loneliest number that you’ll ever do. As for me, I, personally, have never been lonely, either when alone or in a crowd.

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@wsh66 Exercise is a wonderful thing. I can no longer due much and it is sad indeed. Gentle stretching and nothing else. Will admit this has me in a dark place. Medications have been worse than the conditions. Stuff happens. I now confess-I am not super woman nor anything else. Spent my life endeavoring to please others-after 65 years I realized this leaves one alone. Much prefer thus. Hard not being the physically active person I like to be. Again, stuff happens. It could be worse is my mantra.

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@parus

I will not deny I am vintage…definitely not wine. Chronic pain is a demon and one will get no help other than the helps one provides for self. I am far lonelier in a crowd than alone…nice words from an old song and thank you kindly for your words. “Work your fingers to the Bone”, etc.

Mayhap a few more trips around the sun will be the antidote…”gang aft de glay”…Burns.

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Hi parus,lioness here sorry to hear about how pain has crippled you. Do you like to read this can take your mind off for awhile ,how bout audio tapes or even watch cartoons I use to love Tom@Gerry. Do you have buses near by just ride them if you can hope you find something to help.

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