What are your tips for staying independent at your own home?

Many people say they’d prefer to grow old in their own homes. What are your tips for remaining independent as long as possible. What do you do to:
- Keep up with home maintenance and housekeeping?
- Avoid injuries around the house?
- Combat loneliness or stay connected?

Any other tips?

October 25, 2023: Update from the Community Director

The knowledge exchange shared in this discussion helped to create this article written for the Mayo Clinic app and website. Knowledge for patients by patients and beyond Mayo Clinic Connect. Thank you for all your tips.

Aging at home: Advice for staying independent

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Aging Well Support Group.

@wddoerr

What is a "fall device"?

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There are devices which you can wear on your wrist or a lanyard that trigger an alarm when you fall. If you live alone, the signal can go to a family member or a support center. You are able to speak directly to someone to assess what assistance you need. The device can also be triggered by pressing a button if you feel ill and need help.
There are both local and national services that provide these. With a prescription from her doctor, my Mom's was covered by Medicare.
Sue

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@thisismarilynb

I actually visited two of these facilities to see for myself. The living quarters themselves are small. There is no getting around that. Of course they don't want you to spend much time there. There were a lot of old people milling around and many in wheel chairs. Of course I should not talk about old people as I am 89 years old myself. They were all being escorted into a large room to play bingo. The rent is not cheap and it goes up every year. Needless to say I was not impressed. So far I am doing okay. I even hosted a very small Thanksgiving dinner yesterday. My plan is to have help in my own home if and when I get to the point of needing some assistance.

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My new home is in a development with a pool, lakes, and enough streets within the development to provide enough walking. My home only has one step at each external doorway. It is compact and well laid out. I am hoping to stay in this house with minimum to no assistance. Neighbors close by and my daughter walkable in the development next door.

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@llynch17056

My new home is in a development with a pool, lakes, and enough streets within the development to provide enough walking. My home only has one step at each external doorway. It is compact and well laid out. I am hoping to stay in this house with minimum to no assistance. Neighbors close by and my daughter walkable in the development next door.

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That sounds wonderful. It is certainly not what I saw.

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@thisismarilynb

That sounds wonderful. It is certainly not what I saw.

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Not what you saw?

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In reply to @llynch17056 "Not what you saw?" + (show)
@llynch17056

Not what you saw?

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No. I saw small apartments in large buildings. That was it. No walking paths or any of the things you described. I am living in my own home. Of course it is different now that my husband is not here, but it is not a little box in a big box. What you described sounds delightful. Enjoy.

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It helps to develop good computer skills:
1) I pay all my bills, manage my finances and invstments with my computer
2) I order groceries, and lots of other things on line - why go to the store to look for something, what aisle then it is not in stock. Online I can read reviews and they ship from wherever it is in stock. Order enough and there is free shipping.
3) I take all stress out of my life - I will pay for something to be setup correctly so I don't have to be annoyed
4) In these times when I need to restrict my interaction with people because I cannot afford to catch something so I have to be choosey...I have a network of people even internationally that I talk to or email or text ....but people don't like video calls much!!!!
I am amazed how busy I am. All I need is a driverless car and I am totally independent!!!

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@mguspixi25

I’m 50, have limited mobility (no help, community supports, or family, as well as very low immunity which limits what I can do in terms of entering the community). I don’t qualify for assisted living due to my age, so even though there are some areas of my home and outdoor spaces that I haven’t been in for years (I mobilise on crutches and fall often due to tripping - my feet drag), I get someone to mow the grass, but otherwise I can’t access home help (the expense is hundreds per hour unless you qualify for help).
If I could, I’d have vertical rails on walls near doorways, ramps over thresholds on floors/doorways, rails adjacent to toilets & in/around shower, and railings next to steps.
I use a bed stick to aid getting in and out of bed, and have light sensors to turn on lights when it’s night and balance is affected by drowsiness (reaching/twisting for light switches while using walking aids is not easy). I have installed shelves near toilets to hold toilet paper and cleaning items so I’m not reaching down into the bathroom cabinet under the sink, and the little used items are in baskets so I can slide it out instead of bending down to search into the cabinet. I’ve changed door handles to levers to make grip and turn easier, and installed lever mix taps throughout (it was a bit tricky in the bathroom, but I figured it out with YouTube videos). I have lots of easy reach long handled graspers around the house in case I drop something, and I use small sturdy trolleys to move things around (baskets of laundry, shopping deliveries, etc).
When I have falls (4-10 usually each week), I move to furniture and use it to climb up on, and in hallways or areas that don’t have furniture I’ve installed ropes on hooks from the ceiling to help me get up.
It’s helpful to have a pelican belt around your waist if you have frequent falls, and have someone in the house with you, as the belt has handles to aid someone else in getting you off the floor.
I use a flexible magnetic whiteboard on the fridge to write down to do’s, where I see them all the time as reminders, otherwise using reminders in devices to take medication or appointments is helpful.
I have sturdy handles installed on the sides of my computer desk to aid transfer (sit to stand/stand to sit), because it’s a rolling computer chair and increases risks of falls for people with balance deficit.
I use shower stools and over toilet aids with handles to make sit to stand safer.
I’ve coated tiled flooring with anti slip coatings. I use vertical plate and bowl racks to make storage and retrieval easier from cupboards, and again I use lots of baskets to slide in and out of cupboards to make it easier to access items.
In the instance I can’t reach my feet, I use a sock gutter to put socks on. I don’t have access to an alarm for falls (it’s ridiculously expensive), and I’ve already smashed three smart watches when falling (using my arms to protect my face, head and neck), so they are pretty much useless in my case. I do leave my phone within shouting distance and yell for Siri to call an ambulance if I’ve really hurt myself (it’s impractical to carry my phone everywhere around the house using crutches or trollies, where it often falls to a place I can’t easily get it, or I fall and smash it if it’s in my hand while trying to protect my head). And carrying it in some kind of holder on my body isn’t much different.
I recommend having a smart speaker in the house to ‘listen’ to you and respond to commands if you shout out to it, like calling services, relatives, etc.
Keeping busy, I’m a systemic advocate with national and state organisations in homelessness and housing, as well as cancer research (among other things like suicide crisis support for vulnerable people - I volunteer and work from home on the suicide crisis and prevention text and chat service..yep, you get a real person on the chat/text, not artificial intelligence 🙂, support health programs like national quit smoking research in the community where I review the research design for best practice in engaging vulnerable cohorts like people with mental health conditions, and baking/making treats for people as a kindness to them when they’re down or not well - the furthest I’ve shipped treats is to Nevada USA, which was my home made Turkish delight)..I enjoy constructive things that make a real difference to people who sometimes can’t do things for themselves.
Eating well as much as possible helps mind and body, and exercising is helpful however it can require some modification like doing it laying down (I have spinal problems and so working on core strength is easiest and most effective done after waking up, while laying on the bed).
Hopefully something here is helpful 🙂🌺

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You're my hero! Your spirit lifts me. 🙂

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I have the _Get It Together _ workbook from Nolo Press.
This book offers an organized approach to collecting all the necessary records and information that will guide the people who may need to step in if I die or am incapacitated.
For example, I have made sure that all my bank accounts and investments have the necessary riders so that upon my death they will immediately become available to my wife and daughters, avoiding the cost and delay of probate. And I have arranged a loving adoption for my dog if it's needed.
I'm in the process of making cremation arrangements with the Neptune Society so that my body will be taken care of with one phone call.
As I complete taking responsibility for these things I am feeling very free to give all my energy to filling my remaining life with joy, be it days or decades.
Speaking of decades, I also suggest that everyone create and maintain a ten year life plan, really naming and writing down what you want to do. Don't let it escape you!

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@edsutton

I have the _Get It Together _ workbook from Nolo Press.
This book offers an organized approach to collecting all the necessary records and information that will guide the people who may need to step in if I die or am incapacitated.
For example, I have made sure that all my bank accounts and investments have the necessary riders so that upon my death they will immediately become available to my wife and daughters, avoiding the cost and delay of probate. And I have arranged a loving adoption for my dog if it's needed.
I'm in the process of making cremation arrangements with the Neptune Society so that my body will be taken care of with one phone call.
As I complete taking responsibility for these things I am feeling very free to give all my energy to filling my remaining life with joy, be it days or decades.
Speaking of decades, I also suggest that everyone create and maintain a ten year life plan, really naming and writing down what you want to do. Don't let it escape you!

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Thank you, @edsutton. These are great suggestions !

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@edsutton

You're my hero! Your spirit lifts me. 🙂

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Thank you - I really appreciate the sentiment 🌺🙂

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