No more Driving

Posted by johnna16 @johnna16, Jun 3, 2023

My husband’s neurologist recommended to him not to drive. I also am trying to schedule him for drivers evaluation. He doesn’t want to do this but once I have appointment I’ll get him to go. I’m hoping he decides to stop driving before the evaluation. I let him know he’s a danger to himself and others etc etc. Does anyone have any suggestions how I can convince him. Fortunately he only drives to the gym 5 minutes away but anything can happen.
Please do not lecture me about he shouldn’t be driving as I already know this. I am asking for any ideas of what can I tell him and yes I can take away the keys but I would like not to have to do it that way.
Also I haven’t been in car with him for months. He was driving fine about 3 months ago. However it’s best for him to stop. He will be 80 this August. His diagnosis is MCI but I think he is in a dementia stage. Thank you!

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Caregivers: Dementia Support Group.

bobbisedlmayr | @bobbisedlmayr | Jun 10, 2023

In reply to @johnna16 "I am genuinely sorry for what you’re going through. Some days seem endless. I will keep..." + (show)

Thank you its nice to have a place to come and freely talk about what we r going thru.

janet7 | @janet7 | Jun 10, 2023

In reply to @johnna16 "Thank you. Fortunately he drives to the gym only 5 minutes away But I told him..." + (show)

One more thing!
I was told when I called to schedule the driving test that there is a waiting list and yesterday I got an appointment for the middle of September. FYI

bobbisedlmayr | @bobbisedlmayr | Jun 11, 2023

In reply to @janet7 "My doctor has sent an order for my husband for a driving test lasting 3 hours:..." + (show)

I signed my husband up for courage kenny a private driving school to evaluate just as u described He has appt nov 8. His driving has to be evaluated every 6 mos due to lewy body dementia diagnosis. It costs $500 here. But I am thankful for it. I feel will be more thorough then the dmv test was.

bobbisedlmayr | @bobbisedlmayr | Jun 11, 2023

In reply to @janet7 "One more thing! I was told when I called to schedule the driving test that there..." + (show)

Yes a very long wait. I digned up a month ago for nov 9

windyshores | @windyshores | Jun 11, 2023

In reply to @bobbisedlmayr "I signed my husband up for courage kenny a private driving school to evaluate just as..." + (show)

I initially used a driving school too. I found they were too lenient. Also they cannot take any action.

We used a rehab driving evaluator who did have the authority to take the license away on the spot and let the DMV know.

However a driving school may give a good assessment. My mother would not have listened to it or complied!

bobbisedlmayr | @bobbisedlmayr | Jun 11, 2023

In reply to @windyshores "I initially used a driving school too. I found they were too lenient. Also they cannot..." + (show)

What is a rehab driving instructor? Where do you look for one of those? I felt dmv was too lenient. I do think he needs an assessment of where he is at.

windyshores | @windyshores | Jun 11, 2023

In reply to @bobbisedlmayr "What is a rehab driving instructor? Where do you look for one of those? I felt..." + (show)

You get a referral from your MD to the rehab driving eval.

bobbisedlmayr | @bobbisedlmayr | Jun 11, 2023

Thank you

johnna16 | @johnna16 | Jun 20, 2023

In reply to @janet7 "If your husband stopped driving before the test, that would be a real blessing. I finally..." + (show)

Some good news. An advocate put me in touch with someone who assesses MCI/dementia patients for driving in the home. We have appointment this Thursday. I’ll keep you posted how it goes.

janet7 | @janet7 | Jun 20, 2023

I am going to make an appointment with a driving rehabilitation program our neurologist set us up with. It is an hour of evaluation and two hours of behind the wheel in one of their cars. Then we will be able to get a final decision as to whether my husband can drive or not.
He has been quiet and not talking about the test but when I drive, he is constantly finding fault with my driving. Today he finally said he doesn’t want his license taken away and never be able to drive again. I told him he could have a bad accident and we could be sued and lose our home. He understands this but not enough to stop driving. I’m thinking of having him talk to a counselor to help him get through this difficult time.
Please pray for us.