1. < Just Want to Talk

How about a laugh, (hopefully)

Posted by Leonard @jakedduck1, Dec 31, 2018

I believe laughter is the best medicine. Laughter has actually been scientifically proven to help people with depression issues.
Let’s give it a try so we can all get happy and feel better. Many Epilepsy forums I’ve been on had joke sections. I was probably the biggest joke of all since I didn’t get a lot of the jokes. They said the jokes couldn’t be above 4th grade level for me to understand them so my jokes may be rather simplistic but let’s give it a try.
Have a lovely day everyone,
Jake

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jam5 | @jam5 | Jan 9, 2022
In reply to @jakedduck1 "I've heard some people are really going crazy from isolation. I'm glad I'm not one of..." + (show)
@jakedduck1

I've heard some people are really going crazy from
isolation. I'm glad I'm not one of those.
I've just been talking about this with the microwave
and toaster while drinking coffee and all of us
agreed that things are getting bad.
I didn't mention anything to the washing machine as
she puts a different spin on everything.
Certainly not to the fridge as he is acting cold
and distant.
The sink just said everything is going down the drain.
In the end the iron calmed me down as she said
everything will be fine, the situation isn't that pressing.
The vacuum was very unsympathetic. Told me
to just suck it up, but the fan was more optimistic and felt it would all soon blow over!
The toilet looked a bit flushed when I asked its opinion
and it didn't say anything, but the door knob told me
to get a grip.
The front door said I was unhinged and then.
The curtains told me to pull myself together!

Jump to this post

Thank you for the laugh!

REPLY
imallears | @imallears | Jan 9, 2022
In reply to @jakedduck1 "A man just bought a new Ferrari and he decides to take it out for a..." + (show)
@jakedduck1

A man just bought a new Ferrari and he decides to take
it out for a spin. As he's driving, he starts speeding
down the road that he's driving. He suddenly notices a
police car is behind him with his lights flashing and
siren wailing. The man floors he gas petal and takes off.
A few moments in the speedy chase the man thinks,
"What the hell am I doing? This isn't worth going to jail!"
He pulls over and the cop approaches the car.
"Listen, we both know that you were speeding. My shift
is over in 5 minutes and if I write you a ticket, there's
going to be paperwork that I don't want to do. If you can give me one good reason as to why you're
speeding, I'll let you go."
The man thinks for a moment and says, "Well officer, just
recently my wife decided to run off with a police officer
and when you were chasing me, I thought you were bringing her back!"

Jump to this post

@jakedduck1

Hey Leonard, how about some male gender jokes? There’s so many of those it boggles the mind.

Just saying…..
FL Mary

REPLY
2 replies
Mentor
Lori, Volunteer Mentor | @loribmt | Jan 9, 2022
In reply to @imallears "@jakedduck1 Hey Leonard, how about some male gender jokes? There’s so many of those it boggles..." + (show)
@imallears

@jakedduck1

Hey Leonard, how about some male gender jokes? There’s so many of those it boggles the mind.

Just saying…..
FL Mary

Jump to this post

Hahah Mary!!! I’m waiting for his reply with anticipation. How about you! 😂

REPLY
imallears | @imallears | Jan 9, 2022

@loribmt
Oh, I'm sure Leonard is searching for an appropriate comeback
Would love to have him as a neighbor..what fun...I can give as good as I can take lol and he can too.
We love our @jakedduck for bringing smiles and laughter to the Mayo group.

Fl Mary

REPLY
1 reply
Mentor
Lori, Volunteer Mentor | @loribmt | Jan 9, 2022
In reply to @imallears "@loribmt Oh, I'm sure Leonard is searching for an appropriate comeback Would love to have him..." + (show)
@imallears

@loribmt
Oh, I'm sure Leonard is searching for an appropriate comeback
Would love to have him as a neighbor..what fun...I can give as good as I can take lol and he can too.
We love our @jakedduck for bringing smiles and laughter to the Mayo group.

Fl Mary

Jump to this post

Shhhhh. This only encourages him. Giggle.

REPLY
Leonard | @jakedduck1 | Jan 9, 2022
In reply to @imallears "@jakedduck1 Hey Leonard, how about some male gender jokes? There’s so many of those it boggles..." + (show)
@imallears

@jakedduck1

Hey Leonard, how about some male gender jokes? There’s so many of those it boggles the mind.

Just saying…..
FL Mary

Jump to this post

@imallears
I would be the first to joke about my own kind if there was anything funny about them to joke about.
Come back from me? Would I do that? Besides, you gals are much more cleaver than I am.
Now I wasn't raised to doubt the word of a lady so if you say there are guy jokes out there so be it. Maybe you could post a few.
Jake

REPLY
1 reply
Mentor
Lori, Volunteer Mentor | @loribmt | Jan 9, 2022
In reply to @jakedduck1 "@imallears I would be the first to joke about my own kind if there was anything..." + (show)
@jakedduck1

@imallears
I would be the first to joke about my own kind if there was anything funny about them to joke about.
Come back from me? Would I do that? Besides, you gals are much more cleaver than I am.
Now I wasn't raised to doubt the word of a lady so if you say there are guy jokes out there so be it. Maybe you could post a few.
Jake

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Well, Jake…
An english professor wrote up on the board “woman without her man is nothing” and told his students to punctuate it.
The males in the class wrote “Woman, without her man, is nothing.”
The Females wrote “Woman! Without her, man is nothing.”

“Men are like fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it’s our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you’d like to have dinner with.”

REPLY
Leonard | @jakedduck1 | Jan 9, 2022

@loribmt
Did you fine ladies ever stop to think that you might actually be the cause rather than the cure???
Have a nice day,
Jake

REPLY
1 reply
Mentor
Lori, Volunteer Mentor | @loribmt | Jan 9, 2022
In reply to @jakedduck1 "@loribmt Did you fine ladies ever stop to think that you might actually be the cause..." + (show)
@jakedduck1

@loribmt
Did you fine ladies ever stop to think that you might actually be the cause rather than the cure???
Have a nice day,
Jake

Jump to this post

Nope! 😁

REPLY
Leonard | @jakedduck1 | Jan 9, 2022

EATING OUT
-When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and
John will each throw in $20, even though
it's only for $32.50. None of them will have
anything smaller and none will actually
admit they want change back.
-When the girls get their bill, out come the
pocket calculators.
MONEY
-A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs,
-A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that
she doesn't need, but is on sale.
BATHROOMS
-A man has six items in his bathroom:
toothbrush, toothpaste, razor, shampoo,
soap and a towel.
-The average number of items in the
typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man
would not be able to identify more than
20 of these items.
ARGUMENTS
-A woman has the last word in any
argument.
-Anything a man says after that is the
beginning of a new argument.
FUTURE
-A woman worries about the future until
she gets a husband.
-A man never worries about the future
until he gets a wife.
Jake

REPLY
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