Caregiving: I’m frustrated and exhausted.

Becky Hello, Not been on line. Thank You so much, I could not ask for more from all of you!!!!!!! But, come to me also, Smile. I have to tell my husband about the rails in the bathroom ETC. Primary Care Dr. sent the Visiting Nurse, OT, and PT. It was sad when they left, did not last any more than 3 weeks. Only because there is nothing more than can do. 4th I went to a BBQ for 2 hrs. It was good to get out, dressed. Please tell me how you are. Can't use a shower chair because sitting is difficult. I don't know if I mentioned, I have Flat Back Syndrome. My Lumbar Spine doesn't curve anymore. I try to sit having dinner with my husband or if can't I just stand. Your husband is thoughtful and cautious. I won't use a wheelchair yet. I remember my mother saying that to me and now I'm saying the same. She had Post Polio Syndrome. I promise I will call on Monday. I called Dept. Of Aging before nerves thought to ask the questions. I hope your having a good day!

Hello rcjk, You helped already. I have never met so many, sincere, caring People. It does my heart good! For me it means so much. I have PTSD and I know you all are sincere. Meeting your husband was a "Love Story." I to try to do funny things to make him laugh, make sure his laundry is done, Healthy good meals. He seldom shows feelings, I will look into the Post Intensive site, April. My husband is not protective I used to be able to handle that because I was Independent. I worry also about what this does to him. I always say "I'm sorry" "I feel so guilty" I took know it's not Logical. I'm tryingcnot to do that but he is not a communicator, I am. What is he thinking? It was nice meeting you. Wishing you both a Happy Day!

Hi Ginger, I see a Psychologist she had a session with my husband. He's Passive Aggressive. I found a good site on line and it explained P.A. so well. He read it, agreed and that's the end of that. Today the remote to my pain pump is not working properly I told him he walked away. Yet he did a lot of work around our home. I Thanked him. My Psy. as you suggested told me to keep a ledger. I have been doing that on and off. Coloring is a big help. I appreciate your protection. You will never know, I can't explain it. Thank You I hope you are comfortable today!

I feel the same for all of you. I wish we could all meet one day. Thank You.

you will be in my prayers that things get better in your living situation. i am a care giver for 2 92 year old ladies my mom and my aunt (twins). its ok right now they are still independent but my aunt probably wont be much longer. i try to be as giving and caring as i can but both of them are always trying to apologize to me for putting me out. i said i do all this out of love for both of them and i k ow its the right thing to do and they have no one else but me. all i want to hear form them is im making their lives easier and they love em and appreciate what im doing for them. it comes form the heart/ i NEVER want either of them to ever feel guilty or say im sorry for me being there for them. im retired and sold my home and moved here to do just what im doing when they let me. they are stubborn and still very independent so i make sure every day i let them know im here. i let them do what they feel they can and i pick up the slack. do most of the driving to dr appt and take them shopping sometimes ..but again they are stubborn and at least mom is still independent. take care and again you are in my prayers

me being a caregiver for my 92 year old mom and her twin sister my aunt is knowing i will lose them one day and mom is my best friend, thats the hardest part for me. the helping is easy and done with love. they are not ill they are just aging and slowing down thank god no terminal illnesses but it ts the pain on knowing i will lose them one that that is hard for me. just a thought form a caregiver !

Are they able to get around?

My 92 year old neighbor would wear mini skirts, and would only hang around young people. She always tried to make the very most out of each day. If you focus on losing them, you will miss the present. My mother was sick the last years of her life, and it would get exhausting, so I understand that part of what you are going through. We always found things to do with her. Don't think about losing them, concentrate on making lasting memories.

who are you responding to ??

im doing that also me and mom do things and i have to just spend time at my aunts and she rarely leaves her house only to show for food and go to the doc but me and mom go to church and other things. we are talking about the movies and maybe even trying some fishing but when its cooler. But losing her always stays in the back of my mind as i have no idea what i will do when i lose her as she is all i have. i have watched over her and protected her and taken care of her my entire life. my father was not a nice man very abusive so i always had to protect her against him. i was also a cop for over 25 years so its in me to take care of people/ the more i try to not think about losing her the more i think about it. it is inevitable who knows when but i know i will have to deal with it one day. my family is real small now and most have passed and the ones still alive even my brother and sister are not close to me. it will be a shock to my life and i will be lost as to what to do when she is gone.