1. < Mental Health

~ Depressed and scared, not making it financially ~

Posted by Barb @amberpep, Feb 26, 2019

I'm 74 years old and moved 3 years ago from MD to VA. My girls had hounded me to come down for several years so I finally did it. I sold my condo (at a loss), and a job with a dentist. Well, here I am, and financially I'm just not making it. That amount I earned from the dentist covered me with just a little left over. Now, more than often, I don't have enough. I eeked out just enough for my rent this month, and now there's not even enough for a quart of milk. I get S.S. and what I get goes right out for my rent (usually there's enough), and my son sends me money each month. I'm sickened, depressed, and scared. I live in low income housing, and have a budget that practically squeaks. I'm thinking of starting to sell some of my furniture.
I so wish I'd have stayed in MD, for so many reasons, this being one of them. I have applied for oodles of jobs (they're all on line now), and legally they're not supposed to ask you how old you are (although many do), but they all ask when you graduated from either high school or college .... well, it doesn't take rocket science to figure out how old a person is. I'm so depressed about this, and .so upset that my stomach.constantly churns.
Thanks for letting me vent.
abby

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kimspr3 | @kimspr3 | Aug 14, 2019
In reply to @smilie "Hi. Here’s what my brother in law told me. Stock brokers only work with the rich..." + (show)
@smilie

Hi. Here’s what my brother in law told me. Stock brokers only work with the rich people. That he’s the only one who can help me with my finances and everyone else will steel from me. I’m so very depressed, angry, frustrated, frightened, anxious, confused and tired. I’m going to sleep for a little bit more. The truth about my brother in law is that he’s the one who will make me go broke. I’ll explain later. I’m going to try and sleep.

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Is it possible to put your foot down and say, no more? Not true about stock brokers. I hope you had a good rest.

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Moderator
Lisa Lucier, Moderator | @lisalucier | Aug 19, 2019
In reply to @smilie "Hi. Here’s what my brother in law told me. Stock brokers only work with the rich..." + (show)
@smilie

Hi. Here’s what my brother in law told me. Stock brokers only work with the rich people. That he’s the only one who can help me with my finances and everyone else will steel from me. I’m so very depressed, angry, frustrated, frightened, anxious, confused and tired. I’m going to sleep for a little bit more. The truth about my brother in law is that he’s the one who will make me go broke. I’ll explain later. I’m going to try and sleep.

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Hi, @smilie - have you had the chance to speak to the social worker you've been in contact with about your finances and your brother-in-law's involvement with that? You mentioned that he will make you go broke. Will you share more about why you feel that way?

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Moderator
Lisa Lucier, Moderator | @lisalucier | Aug 23, 2019
In reply to @kdo0827 "It can be so frustrating trying to find something that will help. I’ve finally found that..." + (show)
@kdo0827

It can be so frustrating trying to find something that will help. I’ve finally found that a combination of Cymbalta and Adderral help. I still don’t have any desire to get out and go places but some of that is related to my chronic pain. Normally after I do get out I enjoy things but it’s like pulling teeth(I was a dental practice manager) to get me out. The Adderral has made a big difference in my energy level and it makes me feel good to accomplish things during my day. You’ve certainly had a lot to deal with. Have you tried Cymbalta or Adderral?

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Hi, @kdo0827 - just wanted to check in and see how things are going lately? Are you still taking the duloxetine (Cymbalta) and dextroamphetamine-amphetamine (Adderral)?

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1 reply
smilie | @smilie | Sep 4, 2019
In reply to @lisalucier "Hi, @kdo0827 - just wanted to check in and see how things are going lately? Are..." + (show)
@lisalucier

Hi, @kdo0827 - just wanted to check in and see how things are going lately? Are you still taking the duloxetine (Cymbalta) and dextroamphetamine-amphetamine (Adderral)?

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Hi Lisa, I still don’t know how to post.

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1 reply
smilie | @smilie | Sep 4, 2019
In reply to @smilie "Hi Lisa, I still don’t know how to post." + (show)
@smilie

Hi Lisa, I still don’t know how to post.

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I don’t take any of those. I don’t talk to my sister and her husband. Things are really bad!!!!

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1 reply
Moderator
Lisa Lucier, Moderator | @lisalucier | Sep 4, 2019
In reply to @smilie "I don’t take any of those. I don’t talk to my sister and her husband. Things..." + (show)
@smilie

I don’t take any of those. I don’t talk to my sister and her husband. Things are really bad!!!!

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Hi, @smilie - not sure if you've gotten to check out this page before on Get Started on Connect https://connect.mayoclinic.org/get-started-on-connect/? If not, I think you'd find it useful. There click on the plus signs + to see the information under each topic.

When you say things are really bad, do you mean with your sister and her husband, or something else?

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1 reply
smilie | @smilie | Sep 7, 2019
In reply to @lisalucier "Hi, @smilie - not sure if you've gotten to check out this page before on Get..." + (show)
@lisalucier

Hi, @smilie - not sure if you've gotten to check out this page before on Get Started on Connect https://connect.mayoclinic.org/get-started-on-connect/? If not, I think you'd find it useful. There click on the plus signs + to see the information under each topic.

When you say things are really bad, do you mean with your sister and her husband, or something else?

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Hi Lisa, it’s with both. I don’t have anything to do with either of them. I’m moving out of the house they rented because I cannot afford to live here both financially, emotionally, psychologically. It’s so very sad!!!! I need to keep sorting out my things but today or at least this morning I’m having a hard time doing things!!!! I can’t stop crying and I can’t calm myself down!!!!

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1 reply
Moderator
Colleen Young, Connect Director | @colleenyoung | Sep 7, 2019
In reply to @smilie "Hi Lisa, it’s with both. I don’t have anything to do with either of them. I’m..." + (show)
@smilie

Hi Lisa, it’s with both. I don’t have anything to do with either of them. I’m moving out of the house they rented because I cannot afford to live here both financially, emotionally, psychologically. It’s so very sad!!!! I need to keep sorting out my things but today or at least this morning I’m having a hard time doing things!!!! I can’t stop crying and I can’t calm myself down!!!!

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@smilie, I'm confident you can. Deep breath. How are you doing?

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2 replies
smilie | @smilie | Sep 7, 2019
In reply to @colleenyoung "@smilie, I'm confident you can. Deep breath. How are you doing?" + (show)
@colleenyoung

@smilie, I'm confident you can. Deep breath. How are you doing?

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Hi. I hard everyday to feel good and get things done. But this morning I could do nothing but lye in my bed and crying and very sleepy and slow at getting anything done! Life sucks big times right now!!!!

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Faithwalker007 (Renee) | @faithwalker007 | Sep 8, 2019

Your story sounds so familiar to my own parents. They packed up and moved to Florida after my brothers begged them. Did they help? Nope. (Sorry, long story.) We support my parents when and if they ever need it and we are both disabled and live on a fixed income. Why? Because we want to. My folks have now left Florida (please note that one brother no longer lives there as well.)
I only have two questions for you and please know you are in my thoughts and prayers. I hope you seek and find the strength and hope to do what makes you happy.
1. What's wrong with the "girls" helping you like your son does? (If you stay, that is.)
2. What's stopping you from going back to Maryland? Decide to do it. Start the process! Job, home, friend to help? Go for it!

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