Inability to live a normal life — lost, scared

Posted by davidinvegas @davidinvegas, Dec 20, 2018

I have always had a hard time living what I would deam a normal life. I probably don't need to break it all down. My epilepsy has never been fully under control. 32 years or so. The number of seizes isn't the problem, although 1 is to many. About 2 a month, very severe. A lot of injurys over the years. Mostly head injuries. Getting to be a real problem on my mental outlooks. I have had a lot of changes in my life over the past 6yrs. Rainging from divorce too mom passing away, selling her house. Me moving and not being able depend on anyone. Taking care of business is feeling farther and farther away. Afraid, embarrassed and just plain lost. Getting work is proving to be tough mentaly and physically. Leaving it at lost, scared, can't see any kind of light in my personal tunnel.

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Hi Davidinvegas,
I’ve just dealt with a problem roommate and thank God THE BITCH IS GONE! She doesn’t feel like she owes me a dime for the month of December because she did not spend the night here at my home since December 4th. Realize she told me on Tuesday that she was moving out the following weekend! I learned a lot that I think can serve you well with your next roommate. First if all, interview more than one potential roommate. Tell each one your dealbreakers, like no drinking, pay on time, late fee per day after the 5th, not allowing sleep overs, drugs or “borrowing” Of personal items, etc. WITHOUT ASKING YOUR PERMISSION FIRST. Maybe you don’t want to share food or anything so make this known before you offer for the person to move in.
If you could find a dependable roommate who could maybe help clean your home, help to transport you to appointments during certain hours and maybe cook, etc., you could offer the room for less rent. Get this all down in writing down to how many hours of cleaning you expect in return for so much discount in rent. Write down the consequences of failure to perform according to agreement between you. Maybe the roommate could help walk your dog, feed her, transport her to the vet and groomer, pet sit, etc. AGAIN GET IT ALL IN WRITING! Get a first and last month rent BEFORE the person moves in! All of these arrangements must be written down, discussed and agreed upon BEFORE the person moves in. Be very specific when you write up what you are 👀for in a roommate. Include MYST LIKE DOGS!
You have so many more options than you think. Don’t settle for anything or anyone. No drinking and paying on time could get you something many people you don’t want to live with. Write up an advertisement for your ideal roommate. Describe exactly who you are looking for and the situation that would work best for you. Express what you have to offer in lower rent in return for a certain amount of housekeeping, cooking, dog walks, etc. Put all the specifics and details in writing as part of the lease agreement, have the renter initial each item and collect the first and last month’s rent. You can even get as specific as male or female wanted, student for example, and services in the home sought in return for room for certain amount of rent. Describe exactly who you are seeking and the situation you are seeking. Put it out there and the person and situation will find you. Describe all the good perks you have the offer.
I see now that I did not expect enough from the roommate or enough rent $. Be as specific as possible about who you are 👀 for, your expectations, and the situation and arrangement you are seeking. Include the perks and positives of being your roommate. Having all the details in writing helps eliminate problems down the road. There may be a service that helps pair up roommates. We have an app. called Nextdoir where neighbors connect and share things for sale, situations sought, pets missing and found etc. Networking helps find someone who others can recommend. I think funding the right roommate can help
Change your situation.

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@petangelkat1

Hi Davidinvegas,
I’ve just dealt with a problem roommate and thank God THE BITCH IS GONE! She doesn’t feel like she owes me a dime for the month of December because she did not spend the night here at my home since December 4th. Realize she told me on Tuesday that she was moving out the following weekend! I learned a lot that I think can serve you well with your next roommate. First if all, interview more than one potential roommate. Tell each one your dealbreakers, like no drinking, pay on time, late fee per day after the 5th, not allowing sleep overs, drugs or “borrowing” Of personal items, etc. WITHOUT ASKING YOUR PERMISSION FIRST. Maybe you don’t want to share food or anything so make this known before you offer for the person to move in.
If you could find a dependable roommate who could maybe help clean your home, help to transport you to appointments during certain hours and maybe cook, etc., you could offer the room for less rent. Get this all down in writing down to how many hours of cleaning you expect in return for so much discount in rent. Write down the consequences of failure to perform according to agreement between you. Maybe the roommate could help walk your dog, feed her, transport her to the vet and groomer, pet sit, etc. AGAIN GET IT ALL IN WRITING! Get a first and last month rent BEFORE the person moves in! All of these arrangements must be written down, discussed and agreed upon BEFORE the person moves in. Be very specific when you write up what you are 👀for in a roommate. Include MYST LIKE DOGS!
You have so many more options than you think. Don’t settle for anything or anyone. No drinking and paying on time could get you something many people you don’t want to live with. Write up an advertisement for your ideal roommate. Describe exactly who you are looking for and the situation that would work best for you. Express what you have to offer in lower rent in return for a certain amount of housekeeping, cooking, dog walks, etc. Put all the specifics and details in writing as part of the lease agreement, have the renter initial each item and collect the first and last month’s rent. You can even get as specific as male or female wanted, student for example, and services in the home sought in return for room for certain amount of rent. Describe exactly who you are seeking and the situation you are seeking. Put it out there and the person and situation will find you. Describe all the good perks you have the offer.
I see now that I did not expect enough from the roommate or enough rent $. Be as specific as possible about who you are 👀 for, your expectations, and the situation and arrangement you are seeking. Include the perks and positives of being your roommate. Having all the details in writing helps eliminate problems down the road. There may be a service that helps pair up roommates. We have an app. called Nextdoir where neighbors connect and share things for sale, situations sought, pets missing and found etc. Networking helps find someone who others can recommend. I think funding the right roommate can help
Change your situation.

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One of the things I learned from renting apartments and such. Renting to family and friends sometimes will cause you the most problems. It just sounded like someone you knew. I am so sorry she disappointed you. Things will get better.

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@psearby17

Much Good Luck David with your interview on Thursday. Will be thinking about you. Please give us an update. You've got this!

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My job interview is today. I look to meet most required duty. Just not sure how to answer about health issues. Unexpected trips to hospital, days to recover, days I just don't feel right. Just be honest. Not sure? How will or should interviewer react?

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@davidinvegas

My job interview is today. I look to meet most required duty. Just not sure how to answer about health issues. Unexpected trips to hospital, days to recover, days I just don't feel right. Just be honest. Not sure? How will or should interviewer react?

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@davidinvegas Sounds like you’re a bit worried about the interview. Be sure to emphasize what you do well and how you can contibute. When the subject of health comes up, be honest, but also talk about how you won’t let it interfere. Be very positive. They’ll want you and can work around your situation. Rthere are some laws in the workplace that cover employees with health issues. Good luck!

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@davidinvegas

My job interview is today. I look to meet most required duty. Just not sure how to answer about health issues. Unexpected trips to hospital, days to recover, days I just don't feel right. Just be honest. Not sure? How will or should interviewer react?

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@davidinvegas

I hope you get this before your interview today. It is illegal for the company to ask questions about your health in an interview! Don't answer or offer any information about your health in the interview. After you get the job you can discuss your health needs with Human Resources. You'll be protected by the ADA once you've been hired. I was an Human Resources executive before I retired, so I know. Don't give them any reason not to hire you. Go with your skills, what work you've done in the past, and how you will contribute to the organization. Good luck!

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@gailb

@davidinvegas

I hope you get this before your interview today. It is illegal for the company to ask questions about your health in an interview! Don't answer or offer any information about your health in the interview. After you get the job you can discuss your health needs with Human Resources. You'll be protected by the ADA once you've been hired. I was an Human Resources executive before I retired, so I know. Don't give them any reason not to hire you. Go with your skills, what work you've done in the past, and how you will contribute to the organization. Good luck!

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Questions about why I don't drive or can't climb latters or anything I know not to do. If they ask why I don't have drivers license or what is it that limits me. First interview went great. I did get to go over my resume and really talked myself up with all my work history and what I've done to qualify me for job. I was only asked if I had a driver's licence, no I have state id. She didn't ask why.

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@davidinvegas

I'm happy your interview went well. The interviewer can't ask you why you don't have a driver's license. If driving is not part of the job, they can't ask you anything about it. They probably want to know if you have a driver's license because they will do a background check and sometimes use your license number for that. They will check motor vehicle records to see if you lost your license due to DUI, etc. They usually only go back 7 years of your history. The basic thing I told all interviewers was only ask questions relevant to the job--nothing else. You shouldn't volunteer extra information about your health until you have been hired. If you have other questions, I'm happy to answer them.

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@gailb

@davidinvegas

I'm happy your interview went well. The interviewer can't ask you why you don't have a driver's license. If driving is not part of the job, they can't ask you anything about it. They probably want to know if you have a driver's license because they will do a background check and sometimes use your license number for that. They will check motor vehicle records to see if you lost your license due to DUI, etc. They usually only go back 7 years of your history. The basic thing I told all interviewers was only ask questions relevant to the job--nothing else. You shouldn't volunteer extra information about your health until you have been hired. If you have other questions, I'm happy to answer them.

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Thank you for your information. Does using food stamps ad to total income?

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@davidinvegas I have a few friends with SNAP benefits (food stamps) and the food is not considered income.

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