Aging and Changing

Posted by bakerwise @bakerwise, Oct 16, 2018

Discussion Group for people frustrated by eating out in public or feeling as if behavior with a diagnosed but not "solved" problem could result in exclusion from their family's dinner table. Examples: Spontaneous urination and laughter during dinner or tremor that causes food to be pushed off a plate.

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Just Want to Talk Support Group.

@colleenyoung

@bakerwise, what great topic to explore: Aging and Changing. As we age or experience a health event like stroke or car accident we are sometimes forced to adapt to unexpected changes that can exclude us from activities we love and took for granted. Hand tremors, incontinence, memory loss, speech changes, mobility changes are just a few. There are many more.

How does one adapt? How does one negotiate between acceptance and pushing through? These are questions we constantly ask and re-evaluate. I'd like to bring @hopeful33250 @debbraw @parus @thankful and @harriethodgson1 into this discussion, and hope others will join in as well to share their experiences.

What life change(s) are you facing? What impact has it had on your daily life? What solutions or adaptations have you made? Where are you with acceptance?

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@bakerwise- Great topic! As for me, I suffered a major HA back in 2014 and although I was eating the right foods & exercising 3x a week the only thing we could come up with is that genetics played a roll in all of this. I learned that my grandfather on my mothers side had had a HA back in the early 60's at the age of 66 and back then they just treated him mostly with diuretic's and he lived into his late seventies.
I think the biggest thing for me was the mental aspects of all this! I went through cardiac rehab soon after my HA and that went well and moved right back into exercising again as before, but I struggled with what I called "damaged goods" syndrome. After my HA my EF (ejection fraction) was about 35% (normal would be somewhere between 65-75%). I was told that often within the 1st year HA patients will grow additional blood vessels into the damaged area of the heart and the EF usually improves. Well after exercising and continued good eating habits, I was pumped for my 1 year appt. and the results of the upcoming Echo. Well, bottom line was no difference! I had set myself up for some real positive news only to hear in my opinion the opposite! I hit bottom for days and decided I was not going to let this control me and so I continued my exercising, etc. I felt great physically, but in the back of my mind was this haunting!

Last year on our regular trip down to Tucson in April I decided earlier in the year to make an appt. at the Scottsdale Mayo on the tail end of our vacation. I was scheduled for about 5 tests throughout the day with a Stress Echo as the last test of the day. I was seeing a wonderful cardiologist there named Dr. Lynch. He was a hands on doc who was a great listener and was in on just about every phase of even the simple tests that day. When it came to the Stess Echo, he stayed in the darkened room throughout the entire test and while I was up on the treadmill he was right behind me like a coach encouraging me all the way. I had not be able to get my heart rate much past 138 in my cardio sessions at the gym even though I pushed myself, but this day as Dr. Lynch was monitoring me he said "can you go more"?
I felt great and answered yes. He pushed 2 levels past and we ended with a speed of 8 and an elevation of 16. My heart rate got to 155 and I felt like I was running up a mountain! As they had me pop down on the bed for the "stress side of the echo" between Dr. Lynch and the tech they were really excited and kept saying wow, great pictures, good work! Well, as we met in his office soon after this test, he told me that he estimates that my EF was now more like 50+%! I was so... exzillerated by this news and asked how could this change come 3 yrs. later? Dr. Lynch said "well, either the earlier echo's were wrong or more likely you just took longer to grow those new blood vessels".
That was the best experience I ever went through! That experience made me want to continue to work harder and my outlook has totally changed! We must stay optimistic! I knew more than ever that God was not done with me and each day I'm Thankful!
Jim @thankful

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@thankful

@bakerwise- Great topic! As for me, I suffered a major HA back in 2014 and although I was eating the right foods & exercising 3x a week the only thing we could come up with is that genetics played a roll in all of this. I learned that my grandfather on my mothers side had had a HA back in the early 60's at the age of 66 and back then they just treated him mostly with diuretic's and he lived into his late seventies.
I think the biggest thing for me was the mental aspects of all this! I went through cardiac rehab soon after my HA and that went well and moved right back into exercising again as before, but I struggled with what I called "damaged goods" syndrome. After my HA my EF (ejection fraction) was about 35% (normal would be somewhere between 65-75%). I was told that often within the 1st year HA patients will grow additional blood vessels into the damaged area of the heart and the EF usually improves. Well after exercising and continued good eating habits, I was pumped for my 1 year appt. and the results of the upcoming Echo. Well, bottom line was no difference! I had set myself up for some real positive news only to hear in my opinion the opposite! I hit bottom for days and decided I was not going to let this control me and so I continued my exercising, etc. I felt great physically, but in the back of my mind was this haunting!

Last year on our regular trip down to Tucson in April I decided earlier in the year to make an appt. at the Scottsdale Mayo on the tail end of our vacation. I was scheduled for about 5 tests throughout the day with a Stress Echo as the last test of the day. I was seeing a wonderful cardiologist there named Dr. Lynch. He was a hands on doc who was a great listener and was in on just about every phase of even the simple tests that day. When it came to the Stess Echo, he stayed in the darkened room throughout the entire test and while I was up on the treadmill he was right behind me like a coach encouraging me all the way. I had not be able to get my heart rate much past 138 in my cardio sessions at the gym even though I pushed myself, but this day as Dr. Lynch was monitoring me he said "can you go more"?
I felt great and answered yes. He pushed 2 levels past and we ended with a speed of 8 and an elevation of 16. My heart rate got to 155 and I felt like I was running up a mountain! As they had me pop down on the bed for the "stress side of the echo" between Dr. Lynch and the tech they were really excited and kept saying wow, great pictures, good work! Well, as we met in his office soon after this test, he told me that he estimates that my EF was now more like 50+%! I was so... exzillerated by this news and asked how could this change come 3 yrs. later? Dr. Lynch said "well, either the earlier echo's were wrong or more likely you just took longer to grow those new blood vessels".
That was the best experience I ever went through! That experience made me want to continue to work harder and my outlook has totally changed! We must stay optimistic! I knew more than ever that God was not done with me and each day I'm Thankful!
Jim @thankful

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@thankful. Congrats for what you went through and havening a good positive outlook

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@hopeful33250

Thanks for your input, @lioness, you adapt to the needed changes so well. Your participation on Connect is a great way to expand your influence.

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@hopeful33250

AGREED!!!!!

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@thankful

@bakerwise- Great topic! As for me, I suffered a major HA back in 2014 and although I was eating the right foods & exercising 3x a week the only thing we could come up with is that genetics played a roll in all of this. I learned that my grandfather on my mothers side had had a HA back in the early 60's at the age of 66 and back then they just treated him mostly with diuretic's and he lived into his late seventies.
I think the biggest thing for me was the mental aspects of all this! I went through cardiac rehab soon after my HA and that went well and moved right back into exercising again as before, but I struggled with what I called "damaged goods" syndrome. After my HA my EF (ejection fraction) was about 35% (normal would be somewhere between 65-75%). I was told that often within the 1st year HA patients will grow additional blood vessels into the damaged area of the heart and the EF usually improves. Well after exercising and continued good eating habits, I was pumped for my 1 year appt. and the results of the upcoming Echo. Well, bottom line was no difference! I had set myself up for some real positive news only to hear in my opinion the opposite! I hit bottom for days and decided I was not going to let this control me and so I continued my exercising, etc. I felt great physically, but in the back of my mind was this haunting!

Last year on our regular trip down to Tucson in April I decided earlier in the year to make an appt. at the Scottsdale Mayo on the tail end of our vacation. I was scheduled for about 5 tests throughout the day with a Stress Echo as the last test of the day. I was seeing a wonderful cardiologist there named Dr. Lynch. He was a hands on doc who was a great listener and was in on just about every phase of even the simple tests that day. When it came to the Stess Echo, he stayed in the darkened room throughout the entire test and while I was up on the treadmill he was right behind me like a coach encouraging me all the way. I had not be able to get my heart rate much past 138 in my cardio sessions at the gym even though I pushed myself, but this day as Dr. Lynch was monitoring me he said "can you go more"?
I felt great and answered yes. He pushed 2 levels past and we ended with a speed of 8 and an elevation of 16. My heart rate got to 155 and I felt like I was running up a mountain! As they had me pop down on the bed for the "stress side of the echo" between Dr. Lynch and the tech they were really excited and kept saying wow, great pictures, good work! Well, as we met in his office soon after this test, he told me that he estimates that my EF was now more like 50+%! I was so... exzillerated by this news and asked how could this change come 3 yrs. later? Dr. Lynch said "well, either the earlier echo's were wrong or more likely you just took longer to grow those new blood vessels".
That was the best experience I ever went through! That experience made me want to continue to work harder and my outlook has totally changed! We must stay optimistic! I knew more than ever that God was not done with me and each day I'm Thankful!
Jim @thankful

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What a great story, @thankful. You must be very glad that you extended your time in AZ to go to the Mayo Clinic there. Dr. Lynch sounds awesome as well. I appreciate your sharing that experience.

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@lioness

@hopeful33250 We all need to see the glass full you Theresa are a good example of being so positive and helping others is being of good service and balance in our lives With all the problems in my life I as all of us have to adjust I know if I walk to much then my thighs hurt like crazy so Im getting my groceries delivered I cant walk all day like I use to so will just live in my senior building and help others here,I do chair exercises and water aerobics which keep me moving,for this is the key

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@lioness your words are very wise! While I am in my mid-60s, and experience a few chronic illnesses plus a couple of other physical issues. I work very hard at keeping my mental and emotional health as good as possible. My conditions do not define who I am - I am not them I am myself. Do I have the same stamina I had 20 years ago or even 10 years ago? No. But I do the best I can every day based on how I feel. I try to keep positive and understand that I simply cannot keep up with everybody else and they either need to learn to accept that or move away.
Ginger

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@gingerw

@lioness your words are very wise! While I am in my mid-60s, and experience a few chronic illnesses plus a couple of other physical issues. I work very hard at keeping my mental and emotional health as good as possible. My conditions do not define who I am - I am not them I am myself. Do I have the same stamina I had 20 years ago or even 10 years ago? No. But I do the best I can every day based on how I feel. I try to keep positive and understand that I simply cannot keep up with everybody else and they either need to learn to accept that or move away.
Ginger

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@gingerw glad to hear this positive attitude and keeping physical is our key to doing the best we can be now yes disease doesn't define us.

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@hopeful33250

What a great story, @thankful. You must be very glad that you extended your time in AZ to go to the Mayo Clinic there. Dr. Lynch sounds awesome as well. I appreciate your sharing that experience.

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@hopeful33250- Thank you Teresa! Yes I was excited to get a chance to go to Mayo and Dr. Lynch is a real gem! I stay in touch with him through their portal site and he generally gets back to me personally within a few days, which I can't even get my cardiologist here to do? Be well! Jim @ thankful

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Aging has brought about many changes thus causing existing issues to appear and/or become worse. For me acceptance of conditions and now being diagnosed as having disorders, syndromes and chronic conditions may not be designed to encourage me to feel like I am a failure-well, at times it does. I am chronically old what more can I say???!!!!
I can have an attitude and oft feel I am entitled to have thus-I am not. Being chronically old does not suddenly lavish me with rights.
Now where I was heading with this I have no idea-I forgot as I am also chronically forgetful...😉
I can comment that acceptance has been a start. I can also find myself back at the starting line at times and this is okay although I must use caution at to where I admit thus.

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@parus

Aging has brought about many changes thus causing existing issues to appear and/or become worse. For me acceptance of conditions and now being diagnosed as having disorders, syndromes and chronic conditions may not be designed to encourage me to feel like I am a failure-well, at times it does. I am chronically old what more can I say???!!!!
I can have an attitude and oft feel I am entitled to have thus-I am not. Being chronically old does not suddenly lavish me with rights.
Now where I was heading with this I have no idea-I forgot as I am also chronically forgetful...😉
I can comment that acceptance has been a start. I can also find myself back at the starting line at times and this is okay although I must use caution at to where I admit thus.

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@Parus your not alone Im there with you right now I have a horrible sore throat ,cold besides all the aches and pain I forget what I had for supper last night We are born with a purpose in life and at our age our purpose is still there but our age gets in the way ,my mind is young but body just wont follow just do the best you can ,thats all we can do

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@parus

Aging has brought about many changes thus causing existing issues to appear and/or become worse. For me acceptance of conditions and now being diagnosed as having disorders, syndromes and chronic conditions may not be designed to encourage me to feel like I am a failure-well, at times it does. I am chronically old what more can I say???!!!!
I can have an attitude and oft feel I am entitled to have thus-I am not. Being chronically old does not suddenly lavish me with rights.
Now where I was heading with this I have no idea-I forgot as I am also chronically forgetful...😉
I can comment that acceptance has been a start. I can also find myself back at the starting line at times and this is okay although I must use caution at to where I admit thus.

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@parus
So put!
I think about aging, too. I wanted to do it with elegance and dignity. I know I am aging for all the reason you stated so well. But my mind tells me that my body is trying to tease me or test me. I'm really not 63, I am younger. I won't even attempt to guess my 'real' age that I see on the talk shows on TV.
This was suppose to be one of the BEST times of my life. Retired, children grown and successful in marriage and work, grands are terrific and growing like a weed, living in beautiful weathr, the ability to travel...but it isn't happening. As you said, aging has changed my life and the life of people around me, especially my hubby and kids.

All I am willing to accept is the age that is on my personal documents. The rest, I am going to continue to fight for and or against.
Luck to us all!!!!!!

Ronnie (GRANDMAr)

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