Personality Change of Kidney Transplant Patient

Yes, I have talked with his doctors about his changes. I have told them he is depressed. I have told him he is depressed and we have discussed the signs/symptoms of depression. I have serious depression and know it well. His PCP asked him if he felt down sometimes to which hubby affirmed that he did. The doctor's response was, "Well, we all get that way from time to time. It comes with getting older." When hubby told me this I nearly exploded but didn't as he trusts this doctor and my speaking against him doesn't help matters. I on the other hand don't trust this doctor as far as I can throw him.

Hello @cindyt63,

I'm sorry to hear that your husband's PCP was not more proactive when your husband mentioned his depression.

Have you considered a second opinion? It might be helpful so that both you and your husband could have a better quality of life.

I can completely emphasize with your situation which I certainly hope has very much improved or resolved. I'm am also at my witts end with my husband's change in personality following his kidney transplant 7 weeks ago. I have tried everything I can think of, including pastoral counsel. He continues to go into fits of rage, cursing me, putting me down and saying all our problems are my fault. I am the one who reports this to his doctors & social worker but he will not listen to their suggestions. Do you have any suggestions based on your experience? Thank you for sharing your story.

@lulujj777
Hi, I am familiar with two cases of personality changes such as are being described here. One was in myself after receiving massive steroid infusions after diagnosis of MS in 1999. In the months subsequent to this my personality changed to a degree which I didn't notice at all but my wife noticed clearly. I became different from my normal kind caring self. At first she came to wonder whether I was having an affair (which I was not and never have) but eventually through research she found out that steroids can cause significant personality changes in a person. Mine went away after a few months. The other case was Bill, our one time next-door-neighbor who had had heart surgery and, according to Barb, his wife, an ER nurse, one or more of the heart medications he received changed him from a very sweet a wonderful gentleman into an angry, mean and abusive person. Barb was beside herself in how he treated her, even as she was caring for him while he remained sick. In a few months Bill died of his ongoing heart issues. I do think that certain medications, and steroids for sure, can cause this type of personality change. If I were you I would investigate all medications your husband is receiving, or has received (in my case it was 2 months after I'd gotten the steroids), for this possible side effect. BTW, I also just read that personality changes can also be caused by anesthesia. Best, Hank

So glad to find your post. My husband completely changed after his transplant and left me not quite 2 years later. It’s heartbreaking.

Hi @momoftwoboys, I'm so sorry to hear that your husband's transplant resulted in separation. How long ago did this happen? How are you and your boys doing?

Thanks for replying! We are doing as good as can be expected. They are good I think but this happening during Covid has really made things tougher. I still don’t have closure to what exactly made the sudden shift in personality and not for the better. Was it a certain medication, a trigger of an earlier mental issue that was deep seeded? I may never know but my guess it was a combination of both. Awful no matter what bc my kids don’t have the same caring father they use to have.

@momoftwoboys, it really is impossible to know the cause for sure, not to mention unsatisfying. There may never be a true sense of closure, but it sounds like you are focusing on the things that are in your control - your wellbeing and caring for your boys.

@momoftwoboys You are really in a difficult position yet you’re staying strong. Have you been able to talk with your husband’s doctor to see if he has any clue to the changes? Maybe the doctor could refer your husband for mental health when he next sees him. I’ll be thinking of you and your boys

Back when he lest me I did reach out to them and sent a message to his counselor he had been seeing. That’s all I could do bc he took me off his HIPPA. Thank you for replying and thinking of us.