Long-term depression
I have been depressed, when I think about it, since I was a kid (I"m a senior now!) I have been treated off and on with meds and minimal talk therapy, but nothing changes. In the past it has been underlying but as I grow older it is becoming more intense. People ask: 'why are you depressed? I never get depressed, just get a better attitude'. Or they don't hear my (probably passive-aggressive) cries for help. Or they say: 'what do you have to be depressed about?' Actually although I agree with these opinions to a certain extent, it does not address the problem that depression is not a 'why', not is it a 'choice'. It's almost like being gay, you just are. Maybe I should just accept it (guess that's what I have done for decades 🙂 But I don't want to. I want to feel better now. Earlier in my life I was able to enjoy things, although the depression would keep popping out. But now I seem to have trouble enjoying anything, including my own family, and it's harder and harder to 'push depression down' once it's popped. So I have longer periods of depression and sadness and sleeplessness and lonliness, an shorter periods of being able to enjoy my life. Or want something. Or look forward to anything. I will say too that I have as much to be happy about as I do to be unhappy - but as I said, it's not a 'why'. I'm looking for people to explore this idea, and to help each other begin to overcome. Or maybe it's just me and there's no one else who feels this way -- 😉 Thank you for reading all this.
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Hi Lisa
No-I am fine on my medication but I like to share info. that I read about in the paper in case it may be helpful to somebody else.
( I am interested in the medical field).
Ainsleigh
Thank you, my prayers are with you too dianajane.
Thank you for your kind words.
Yes. Just to live peacefully one day at a time. Thats all I desire as well. My wish for you, too.
always
Thank you LoveToAll. I think it is feeling like I am all alone. You began to think you are the only one that has this. You look around at all the other people...they are living, laughing going on with life. You want so bad to be (normal) ???. Yes, the worst thing is feeling alone and that you arn't enjoying life like you should.
Hi Annie! You are certainly not alone, and that is why I am glad you are here with us. Many of us have "been there and done that." I have had a long period of feeling pretty much alone, as 1) we live out in the country with no neighbors, 2) I travel 45 minutes one way to work in another town, 3) we go to church in yet another town, as my family is involved with the praise band there, 4) my only sister lives 1200 miles away and we do not see each other often. I have become a stranger in my home community, with not much time to create/maintain new ties. I'm feeling pretty much like a robot, and there are times when I have shed tears all the way home from work in the afternoons. While my husband is a good musician, he is not a social person, so I cannot rely on him to create relationships we both can tap into. My fur babies save me! I know I am missing so much. Soon I will retire and, hopefully, I will find some roads into new groups/activities. So I FULLY UNDERSTAND how you feel. I'm TOUGH, by golly, and I will not give up. Guess what? I have a big, red, stuffed Love Frog that rides to/from work with me! It has been nice to be able to touch something warm and fuzzy on those days I was shedding tears! No, I'm not crazy; just creative! lol When all else fails..... Know that I care about you and will be looking forward to hearing how you approach all of this. I know you will be successful, whatever you have to do! God bless you!
You’re definitely not alone. I wish we all lived near each other and could meet to support one another. Having this forum is a wonderful tool though. I find myself jealous of even my adult children who seem to have it all together and how they are living so carefree. Of course I’m very happy, proud and supportive of them but I often sit and think will I get back to that life? Still struggling today with the Lexapro withdrawal and the Cymbalta addition. Also still sick so it’s not been my best week. I will say my head seems more alert, perhaps clearer so maybe that means the Lexapro is on its way out! All we all really want is to be at peace, to smile, to want to join in. It’s not too much to ask for. We simply have to keep trying to find what works for us. I pray that each of you will find yours soon.
Well said @kdo0827. Do you mind if i ask if you are a senior.
And you, as well, @kdo0827 ! And yes, wouldn't we be a productive group?! I hope you truly are moving toward better times, and I hope you will keep us posted. God bless you!