ICD shock anxiety.

I think it's good ol' classical conditioning. It's the same thing that happens when you get drunk on (pick your fave drink) and then cannot drink it any more because you think it makes you sick. No, too much of it made you sick, but I can understand why it's not on your fave list any more. You have made the association with that drink and feeling horrible next morning...or all night long AND morning.

In this case, you have had several unexpected shocks, which by themselves are distinctly unpleasant. However, they signify a change in your heart's condition, possibly a deterioration that has begun to assert itself, and that is worrying. Who wouldn't feel that way with an ICD doing what it is meant to do?

You will feel somewhat better once you and your cardiologist knows what has changed, and if it can be managed. If it's the ICD, that can be fixed. If it's you, you might be able to be fixed. And then you can forget about any more shocks. But I would hope, and try, to convince you that the ICD is probably doing what it was engineered to do....................FOR you. Yeah, it's a sudden and swift kick in the pants, but...you need it....maybe?

@gloaming it's blaringly obvious, that you have never carried an implanted defiberlating device in your chest.

Were you conscious for the five shocks? I had an event where I was unconscious, and I got shocked three times to get me in rhythm. I would not have guessed that until my data was pulled.

I ask because I did have headaches and lightheadedness for a few months afterwards which I attribute for being unconscious for a minute in VT/VF. The anxiety is very real when you know what it feels like pre-event. The only thing that makes it better is TIME. Sometimes we don't have the answers we want or need. Listen to your EP team. I'm not sure who your provider is, but second opinions are always an option too if you feel the need.

I'm sorry you are going through this, and I can relate. The anxiety will get better but a small piece may always be there. It is scary, it's always easier said than done, but we have to live our lives. We did not choose to walk this path, BUT we can choose how we walk it.

@rkent Okay, what's your point?

@abenn86 hello, I was not conscious for all five shocks I only know I had one shock the rest was information pulled from data as you mentioned. How long did those headaches/ lightheaded last? So maybe this is why I’m feeling this way. I thought it was the mexilatine medication but I can’t stop it if it’s helping me.

@gennsa

My headaches and light headedness lasted two or so months. Every time I started feeling that way, I thought another event was happening as I got very light headed and dizzy before my event.

I did have a med change as well with being put on Amiodarone along with Metoprolol which I had already been taking. My HR would get into the low 50's so that with those symptoms they did cut my Metoprolol in half. So, it is hard to say for sure if it's the event itself or medicine. My guess is a combination of both? I feel like any time we have these events and go unconscious that it leads to a period of brain fog after. Today was actually my last day on Amiodarone so we will see how that goes.

It is scary. I know that. I assure you that time helps. If you aren't already, have you considered therapy for the anxiety. It's a matter of finding the right fit, but once I did it has helped me tremendously and I was never a therapy guy years ago.

Hi Gennas @gennsa i can really relate to what your going thru. I had a pacemaker with defibrillator for about 10 years. Not as young as you tho. I too became very fearful of the next shock. I always had 2 shocks together a minute or so apart whenever I went into VT. I got so fearful I did see a councilor about it that helped a little but I found my own way to deal with it. I would basically check my pulse whenever I would get a feeling something was wrong and if my pulse felt normal I would chock it up to anxiety and move on. I would sometimes even yell at myself for being so upset about something that was not happening.

I also found out about 2 methods that can help reset the heart when its in a VT they are also used when someone is having a heart attack.

1. Cought very strong and violently can squeeze the heart and cause it to change rhythm.
2. As a woman maybe you know the other one. It's taught to pregnant woman to help get their pelvic floor muscle stronger to be ready for delivery. But basically you squeeze the muscle you use to go number 2 and hold it for a few seconds release and re hold. Keep it up until your rhythm corrects itself or you get shocked. But I found at least it was something I could do to take my mind off the shock.

One other area if I was at home is i would lye down and try to relax.
Hope
Those help.
One other area is tell your EP doc. And try different settings on your pacemaker. I had my set to try
And pace me out of a VT prior to shock. Sometimes it worked but towards the end nothing was working. If your wondering my heart got to the point that I was on 3 medications and nothing was working so I ended up with a transplanted Heart.

I might also mentioned that I was on Aminodrone and Mexitine most of my 10 years. One doctor tried to take away the medicine and only have me on a low dose of Aminodrone but once it got out of my system it came back with a vengeance. So I actually believed for a while probally 5 or 6 years went really well being on both. So I know in my case the medicine was important.
Hang in there and let you Doctors know how your feeling. The peacemakers they have today have all kinds of new tricks to solve issues as I remember my first pacemaker was in 2007 and I had a battery replacement in 2012 I think and that gave me more options to settings. I got my transplant in 2018 and im sure since then there is even more options.
Have a Blessed Day