Anyone have suggestions for elderly parent who refuses to take meds?

Posted by bessjf @bessjf, Aug 10 7:31pm

I am the primary caretaker for my 99-year-old mother whose cognitive abilities have been deteriorating more in the past few months. She does not have dementia in the sense that she recognizes everyone/her daily life, history etc. but her short-term memory is very poor and she asks the same questions (eg: What time is it? What day is it? What are you doing today? Did you talk to [sibling] today?) all day long. I manage everything in her life - finances, healthcare, meals, maintenance, transit, clothing etc. - and medications. I order them, organize them and give them to her. About a month ago, she started debating with me about having taken them, and then refusing to take them. This has now become a regular thing. My brother suggested I have her sign her name in the morning and evening when she takes them so she has some agency. That worked for a couple of weeks and this evening she signed her name, I handed her the pills, and she looked right at me and said, “You already gave those to me, I’m not taking them.” I showed her the paper with her signature - made no difference. I have all the pills in view and they are marked Monday-Sunday and times of day. The morning pills were gone and the evening pills were in the cup I handed her. It made no difference - she refused. Suggestions?

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Profile picture for carol67 @carol67

My dad did the same thing. We honored his wishes. He was mentally fine. He was done with everything. That's what happens on the journey to the end. Not taking the meds did not affect his health. He was 91. He was adamant about it. It was his choice.

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@carol67
Sometimes taking them with pudding or applesauce makes them easier to swallow and covers the taste of the pills.

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Profile picture for lisamk80 @lisamk80

@carol67
Sometimes taking them with pudding or applesauce makes them easier to swallow and covers the taste of the pills.

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@lisamk80 he had no problem swallowing. It was his choosing. After a certain point , it was time to listen to what he wanted.

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Profile picture for lisamk80 @lisamk80

@carol67
Sometimes taking them with pudding or applesauce makes them easier to swallow and covers the taste of the pills.

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@lisamk80 Welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect! I know that you have been on the side lines for quite a while and now you’ve decided to give a suggestion! And it’s a great suggestion, too!
Are you caring for someone with dementia or just doing some educational reading?

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