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Has anyone had to look for a group home for a special needs child?
Has anyone dealt with looking for a group home for an adult special needs child.
I am 80 yrs old, but young at heart, my husband is 79. Yrs old.
We adopted our daughter when she was 2yrs old, to join our family with 3 brothers.
She has been a blessing and a joy, everyone loves her.
But at our age we want to be able to help her make the transition before it becomes an emergency occasion.
She is in a day program which she loves, is involved with our religious community and has contact with her brothers and families. Her brothers love her but not in a position to take her.
I am having a very hard time dealing with this and just writing about it brings me to tears. I will miss her so much, she makes us smile every day and wakes up every day happy to do whatever is planned.
Yes she had her off times, she doesn’t like it when I check her teeth and have her brush them more, she doesn’t like clothes shopping for herself and just wants to get it over with. She loves to help in the house and is happy if she can wash laundry , dry and put it away, same with dirty dishes in the dishwasher.
How am I going to get through this and not upset her by crying.
She has been accepting of the idea because I likened it to her brothers going away to college, and all the new friends they made and the things they learned, but still came home to visit. Kim is 52 yrs old, the same age as her youngest brother,
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My sister transitioned away from home at 50 yo. My parents never wanted her “labeled” with a disability, so she does not qualify for government support although she functions somewhat similar to Down Syndrome. So the group support she receives is different, all private pay. My mom had investigated available group living supports in FL, chose five, and we drove around FL to visit each, meet staff, view how it functioned.
A friend whose daughter has a child with a disability moved her daughter to a government support group home when she was about 20. This mom also loved the time with her daughter so when she started at the group home, I believe, she only stayed a couple of days a week for maybe 3-4 weeks. They added more days. She continued to spend weekends at home for quite a while. Now, about 7 years later, they still take her shopping or out to lunch. Visiting overnight at home is very infrequent. The young woman with a disability adjusted well to the group home, found a best friend, and does not object to staying in the group home. Of course, no later how few days she was at the group home, the cost was the same as if she were there 24/7 as the home needed to hold her room and have enough staff.
@triciaot Thank you for your reply, it’s nice to know that your friend’s daughter made a good adjustment, a few days at a time worked well for her. How is your sister doing ?
I am also in the process of seeing a lawyer to have our middle son who lives near us appointed a Co-guardian so that if something happened to my husband and I at the same time, he would not go through the court system to get guardianship. There’s a lot to think about when you get older. We already have a will with a Special Needs trust in place.
@emyliander My sister is doing well! I have power of attorney for financial and healthcare, but not guardianship. Technically she can make her own decisions, but really she does not handle any big issues. My nephew also has legal documentation to take over as POA when I no longer can do it. There is a trust in my mother’s name that my sister is sole beneficiary that I oversee. The hope is that it lasts!!
There is a lot to think about! Its good that you will have the legal work done for your son to help out if needed. My older brother had been managing my sister’s care but was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer last year so we transitioned her care to me. That was a lot of work!