1. < Caregivers: Dementia
Profile picture for mtdt757

How to have the discussion of taking away the car keys?

Posted by mtdt757 @mtdt757, Aug 4 11:19am

The time has come (Have been putting this off). After so many brain fog issues in the last month, I can't let my husband drive anymore. Not looking forward to this conversation. Any tips and suggestions would be appreciated.

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Caregivers: Dementia Support Group.

Profile picture for kjc48
kjc48 | @kjc48 | Aug 8 8:18am

@judimahoney Nothing is forever, but what a painful process when it has to end so abruptly. I'm sorry for your gaping wound, but rest assured, I have one too. I had hoped my husband and I would have been able to take another Bahamas trip, where he captained the boat. So beautiful that week. So blessed to have at least taken that trip with him.
Best, Karla

REPLY
Profile picture for mtdt757
mtdt757 | @mtdt757 | Aug 9 11:40am
In reply to @judimahoney "@mtdt757 I started the conversation with my husband before he stopped driving, telling him his judgment..." + (show)
Profile picture for judimahoney @judimahoney

@mtdt757
I started the conversation with my husband before he stopped driving, telling him his judgment was off and he was veering off course frequently. He would not be convinced that he needed to stop, and thought he was just fine.
The way it ended was horrible, and we and the other driver nearly lost our lives (so, no, he wasn't fine to drive anymore).
My husband has anosognosia along with his frontotemporal dementia, so the lack of self-awareness makes it challenging to convince him of anything.
The best advice I read from folks on this site is to have their doctor take away their license. Alternatively, you can anonymously report a person to the DMV, and they send a letter to them requesting they come in to take a physical driving test.
Good luck!

Jump to this post

@judimahoney My husband's doctor wrote up a directive for me to take away the keys 5 months ago. I have hidden the keys which results in an argument with him. I spoke to someone that said disable the battery cables to the car. I'm going to have his brother, that is coming to visit do that.
Prayers

REPLY
Profile picture for Colleen Young, Connect Director
Moderator
Colleen Young, Connect Director | @colleenyoung | 6 hours ago

Also see these related discussions:
- The Driver's License Discussion... https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/the-drivers-license-discussion/
- Driving-and when to stop https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/driving-and-when-to-stop/
- Gave up driving, but... How to ask others not to encourage driving?https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/gave-up-driving-but/

REPLY
Please sign in or register to post a reply.