1. < Mental Health

No motivation — feel like I'm going down a black hole

Posted by twobluelady @twobluelady, Aug 23, 2017

Currently not on any medication though I have been in the past on Celexa. Thought most of my problem was a painful divorce and went off medication. Since then I have lost my job, living with family, gained almost 100 pounds. I just can't seem to find the motivation to change anything and feeling helpless. I know I need to find a doctor and get back on medication, but what can I do in the meantime? I feel I'm going down a black hole.

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Brightwings AKA Cute Susie | @brightwings | Mar 22, 2018

Ok, Bright Wings here. I so identify with no movation and depression. First of all, non of us are lazy. We are depressed. Huge difference.
I learned what I had to do was put one foot in front of the other and keep going. I wanted to end my depression. I was not going to take no for an answer.
Now having said that, there was no way I could do exercise. I never had in the past after all, so why would I think I would start in the midst of a depression.
I had to do other things first, such as going out and buying watercolor cards and copy them with watercolor paint.
Then I got motivational tapes, yes I know they don't make tapes any more. Give me a break, I'm 67. I also signed up for book tapes at the big library in Springfield, Mo. That way I could still "read" and get away from the tv. As I had to GO TO THE LIBRARY, it got me out of the house and usually a good lunch too.
I am a do what it takes kind of girl. Are you?

REPLY
Moderator
Lisa Lucier, Moderator | @lisalucier | Mar 23, 2018
In reply to @hopeful33250 "@twobluelady Welcome to Mayo Connect, I'm so glad that you posted about your lack of motivation..." + (show)
@hopeful33250

@twobluelady Welcome to Mayo Connect,

I'm so glad that you posted about your lack of motivation and your need to make some changes. You know, admitting you have a problem is the first step in getting better. Divorce is a difficult thing to recover from. Many of us have walked that road and understand how it feels.

Several months ago, we had a discussion called "Happiness: A One Week Journey," here is the link to that discussion, https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/happiness-a-one-week-journey/

Perhaps you will find some encouragement by looking at Dr. Amit Sood's program. In the meantime, stay connected with us. Find things to do that you enjoy, like walking, talking, listening to music, etc.

We look forward to hearing from you.

Teresa

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Hi, @ricktrout -- just saw your username on this discussion and wanted to let you know I am thinking of you. You sure went through a lot of losses, and I'm so sorry about that. Wondering how you are feeling these days?

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freesociety | @freesociety | Apr 19, 2018

I’ve come to realize a big part of my problem is staying home and not going out. When I do get out, run errands, etc, I feel better. However, hard to go out when you have to watch your money and self-esteem issues so bad. Feel like everyone is looking at the “fat” lady. In my group of friends, I am by far the biggest. In reality i know everyone is not looking at me, but emotionally it’s hard. Plus there ARE some people who definitely discriminate against you. It has happened to me before. Even in my looking for work, I’m paranoid about it.

REPLY
1 reply
Parus | @parus | Apr 20, 2018
In reply to @gentleness "Sometimes you really have to push yourself. Take a walk. I'm not the best at following..." + (show)
@gentleness

Sometimes you really have to push yourself. Take a walk. I'm not the best at following this advice though. It's hard. Do good things for yourself. A massage perhaps. Best of luck to you.

Jump to this post

I have learned that walking does help and it is a free activity-a definite plus when on a fixed income. hoping to get back to doing so once the weather warms enough.

REPLY
Parus | @parus | Apr 20, 2018
In reply to @hopeful33250 "@twobluelady Welcome to Mayo Connect, I'm so glad that you posted about your lack of motivation..." + (show)
@hopeful33250

@twobluelady Welcome to Mayo Connect,

I'm so glad that you posted about your lack of motivation and your need to make some changes. You know, admitting you have a problem is the first step in getting better. Divorce is a difficult thing to recover from. Many of us have walked that road and understand how it feels.

Several months ago, we had a discussion called "Happiness: A One Week Journey," here is the link to that discussion, https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/happiness-a-one-week-journey/

Perhaps you will find some encouragement by looking at Dr. Amit Sood's program. In the meantime, stay connected with us. Find things to do that you enjoy, like walking, talking, listening to music, etc.

We look forward to hearing from you.

Teresa

Jump to this post

@ricktrout How are things going for you?

REPLY
Mentor
Teresa, Volunteer Mentor | @hopeful33250 | Apr 20, 2018
In reply to @gentleness "Sometimes you really have to push yourself. Take a walk. I'm not the best at following..." + (show)
@gentleness

Sometimes you really have to push yourself. Take a walk. I'm not the best at following this advice though. It's hard. Do good things for yourself. A massage perhaps. Best of luck to you.

Jump to this post

Hi @parus

I agree. When winter ends we can all enjoy the benefits of the "free" out of doors again!

Teresa

REPLY
Parus | @parus | Apr 20, 2018

It seems motivation does not grow on trees nor within my psyche. I ask myself regularly why even bother. If I do not care then things seem easier. Just zone. Make sure the bills are paid and nothing else really matters. Retirement is spectacular-and the cow jumped over the moon. I am a winner in the isolation world.

REPLY
2 replies
callalily74 | @callalily74 | Apr 20, 2018
In reply to @parus "It seems motivation does not grow on trees nor within my psyche. I ask myself regularly..." + (show)
@parus

It seems motivation does not grow on trees nor within my psyche. I ask myself regularly why even bother. If I do not care then things seem easier. Just zone. Make sure the bills are paid and nothing else really matters. Retirement is spectacular-and the cow jumped over the moon. I am a winner in the isolation world.

Jump to this post

Glad to hear you're doing well.I'm beginning to share those same ideas. Not much else really matters, and most people are too busy caring about themselves, rather than ogling you.

REPLY
Moderator
Lisa Lucier, Moderator | @lisalucier | Apr 24, 2018
In reply to @freesociety "I’ve come to realize a big part of my problem is staying home and not going..." + (show)
@freesociety

I’ve come to realize a big part of my problem is staying home and not going out. When I do get out, run errands, etc, I feel better. However, hard to go out when you have to watch your money and self-esteem issues so bad. Feel like everyone is looking at the “fat” lady. In my group of friends, I am by far the biggest. In reality i know everyone is not looking at me, but emotionally it’s hard. Plus there ARE some people who definitely discriminate against you. It has happened to me before. Even in my looking for work, I’m paranoid about it.

Jump to this post

Hi, @freesociety -- wanted to check back with you and see how you've been feeling motivation-wise the last couple days. Have you been able to get out of the house at all?

REPLY
jnettle1 | @jnettle1 | Apr 24, 2018
In reply to @parus "It seems motivation does not grow on trees nor within my psyche. I ask myself regularly..." + (show)
@parus

It seems motivation does not grow on trees nor within my psyche. I ask myself regularly why even bother. If I do not care then things seem easier. Just zone. Make sure the bills are paid and nothing else really matters. Retirement is spectacular-and the cow jumped over the moon. I am a winner in the isolation world.

Jump to this post

Noooo, I am happy to ogle her.

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