COPD and Can’t Commit to Quitting Smoking

Hello @nanax4, and welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect.
@kjr11 posted a beautiful post meant to help all who will listen.
I was a dedicated smoker for over 42 years and NEVER thought I could quit. Mostly because I didn't want to, I enjoyed my filthy habit. And also...I had tremendous FEAR that if I tried, I would start again, and IF I tried, I would crave them so bad it may make me crazy.
Part of that was true...fear of quitting something I enjoyed might mean I would never enjoy my life without those lying little sticks of poison.
Cigarettes are liars.
They lie to you and make you think they are your friend. They are always there for you.
When you're stressed.
When you're happy.
When you're sad.
When you're mad.
When you need to think.
When it's time to relax.
When you need to calm down.
During commercials.
At weddings, baby showers and funerals.
After dinner. Before breakfast with coffee. With a drink. The list goes on.
It's all a lie!
They are NOT YOUR FRIEND, they have lied to you and made you a slave to them. A silly little piece of paper with tobacco and nicotine and other cancer causing additives are NOT your friend.
This is an important concept to understand.
I also quit cold turkey. Not many people are successful, and start again, like only 8% are successful. I also have a full pack and a half of a pack in my freezer. In case of emergency I told myself. Knowing they were there (and still are to this day) gave me some peace. I didn't want to be going to Circle K at 1:30 AM on the day I was going to break...but I have not touched them.
Thankfully, it did not take getting bladder cancer like @kjr11, which is certainly a reason to quit. There are numerous other reasons to quit, which being a former smoker I know them all, and bet you do too.
I was also an athlete and felt pretty good being able to run and hike and ballroom/swing dance like I did. Plus, I only smoked like 5-6 day. That's not bad, right? Ha! Wrong!!!
But I knew. I knew it was going to catch up with me someday. I also felt like a hypocrite.
We don't need to be told how bad they are...we know. So no need to go there.

I have shared before in the "Smoking Section" at Mayo Clinic that the easiest way to quit smoking is the one that works for YOU!

Everyone that has ever quit this filthy and expensive habit will say they feel better and are grateful to not be a smoker.
There is NO downside to quitting.
You feel better, smell better, have more money, and have more time for real things, rather than standing outside, away from gentle people while you puff and drag on your cigarette.
You are a winner when you are a quitter.

I can share that Allen Carr's Easy Way to Quit Smoking book was a tremendous help to me when I first started. I loved learning the reason we are addicted to this hideous little creep.
I also got several bags of hot cinnamon candy at the Dollar Store and each time I wanted a smoke, I'd pop one of these hot and spicy candies in my mouth instead of lighting up.
I would take time during the awful cravings (they are real--they are awful) and straighten up a drawer. Or my pantry. Or the linen closet. Anything to use my hands and get away from the thoughts for ten minutes.
I can promise you this as well, the cravings are BAD. You will want to give in to the liars, but oh how wonderful you feel when you went all day without one. And then another. And a week has gone by, and now a month. And one day, you realize you went several days without even thinking about them. Hallelujah! You did it!
It WILL get better. Be prepared to fight for your life...because in a sense, that's what you are doing.

You have the power inside you. Sounds like Darth Vader in Star Wars...but it's true. It is within your ability to do this and nothing anyone says can make that happen.
Only you.
The excuses for not quitting are exhaustive. There will always be stress in life. 100%. For real.
I still crave them from time to time, but after 8 years, I know I will never go back.
And just like @kjr11, I too, was shocked how good I felt at two weeks. In a month. And now forever. I felt incredible!
You ask for "any real suggestions" but you may be blocking them because in truth, you don't want to quit, so you don't want to listen to suggestions...you will have a reason why you can't quit.
Here's the Truth:
You can quit.
You can quit.
You can quit.
You have to want it!
What will you lose by quitting cigarettes? Make a list. Read it. Ask yourself, what will I lose by quitting cigarettes?

@karukgirl I did quit! I smoked a long time ago. I smoked a pack a day when I was 18 yrs old . I quit smoking when I was 57. 39-40 years total. After 21 years of no smoking . I was diagnosed with emphysema in the ER , went home on 4 ltrs. Oxygen 24/7. That was 3 years ago . I am still on 4 ltrs oxygen 24/7. No portable consentrators work for me . I am the old crone with the tank on a cart . That D tank lasts me 1 1/2 hours . I carry spares . I even have a 2 tank cart . Smokem’ if you gottem ‘ . But be prepared . Blessed Be , Crystalena

Cyrstalena, @crystalena, thank you for posting a "truth hurts" post!
You sound like you have a wonderful attitude, and I appreciate how you have adapted to your new life with tanks and tubes. It must have been really devastating at first.

How very sad and surprising too, that after all those years of not smoking, you get hit with such a rotten diagnosis. It's a risk so many of us were willing to take. Thinking we are all that and a bag of chips and it won't happen to me.

Thank you for posting what you did...it hurts to think of how your life must be so limited now, and yet here you are...trying to help others.
I pray you continue to share with others your story and what they too may face from this terrible addiction to nicotine.
My dad always said "Do as I say, not as I do!" which is what we eventually learn if we live long enough on this planet.
Are you able to get outside and enjoy nature? Or feel comfortable going places? Do you have a hobby that brings you joy?

@karukgirl Hi , you are so kind .
I live in the upper part of the lower peninsula in Michigan . I-75 .. - 50 miles below the Big Mac. My husband had property . We came and built a house . That is when I quit smoking .. I had never experienced the seasons . The fall colors are eye candy . The snow beautiful . Spring and Summer too short . I do go out . Not a lot . But my husband is all help. He is the oxy man. I take rides on the wooden rumble seat on his tractor . We have a small ( pond) lake on our property . We go there and watch the red winged blackbirds and the loons. Bullfrogs burping . No more campfires in the rock fire circle . But we take a lunch sometimes . Yes , thank you , I am happy . I will be 81 soon . That’s a good long time to me . I like to keep meds as simple as I can . No respirator for me . I live as natural as I can . I am also a DNR. Life is still good for me . I want to enjoy every day of it . I have sold on eBay since the late 90’s . I sold things I painted , wood burned runes ,altars , pottery , dishes and a wide variety of things. I sell a bit now . I have been doing some Sashiko. It is slow stitching and freedom of design rules Thank you for your very kind note . You made my evening very warm , and I am smiling. Blessed Be , Crystalena

I’m currently reading Allen Carr’s book Easy Way to Stop Smoking. It’s really helping me get a different perspective on quitting smoking and why the WILLPOWER method has never worked for me. He encourages people not to quit until they have finished the whole book but I’m sure it would help someone who has already quit. Good luck!

@crystalena ,
What a beautiful picture you painted with words. I can "see" the colors, smell the pond, hear the birds and frogs...how wonderful you get to enjoy the property you live on.

Fellow mentor @gingerw is an artist with fabric as well...although I could not explain what it is she does with fabric...but it's creative for sure. I wonder if she has heard of Sashiko.
Eighty-one sounds younger all the time to me. What's the saying? It's not the years in your life...it's the life in your years that matter most.
You keep that wonderful attitude and be careful up on the wooden rumble seat! You don't want to add stunt person to your long list of accomplishments!
Where would one find you on eBay?

@karukgirl @crystalena Yes, I have done a bit of Sashiko! It reminds me of slow-stitching, and needs to be accurately placed since it is done by using contrasting fabric and thread! I am mostly a quiltmaker and writer. Being able to translate a "mind's eye view" into words or fabric is a challenge I eagerly take on!
Ginger

Oh boy! Do I ever know your current situation @peacelovejoy! I was a dedicated smoker of cigarettes for 42 years. It is an addiction. And to those who serve their cigarettes demands, the embarrassment of defending our little "friend" keeps us in a vicious cycle.
There is only one way to quit smoking.
What is it you ask?
The way that works for you! It is in YOUR power to stop, not a patch, not an e-cigarette, not gum...those all contain the drug you crave.
I quit January 8, 2018. For anyone with this addiction, you never forget the momentous day of ending your slavery to this little, stupid, liar. I said your same words... "I can't quit because I can't handle the stress in my life". Cigarettes lie. We think we need them to calm down. We need them to enjoy a party. We need them to think. We need them if we have a cocktail. We need them when we are happy. We need them when we are sad, mad, stressed. It's all a lie. The truth is it is an addiction. And it is the most powerfully addictive substance on Earth. More addicting than heroin. The withdrawals are nothing like heroin though...it's in our mind where the addiction lives.
May I suggest a book that really helped me? Allen Carr's Easy Way to Quit Smoking. I found it fascinating how nicotine works in the brain, and the psychology behind all of it. It has been 5 years since I smoked my last cigarette. I will not say it was easy. It was really, really a battle in the beginning. But I wanted to be the one in control, not allow some stupid little object to control me. Cigarettes are liars! I won't say I still don't want one, but the times I crave them are further and further apart. I was so amazed one day when I realized I didn't even think of having a smoke once that day. That is when I knew...I made it! Every person is different. I quit cold turkey. I read that only 8% of cold turkey quitters make it. I am one of them. Some things that helped me in the very beginning: I went to the Dollar Store and got bags of hot cinnamon hard candy. I had a habit in the evening of smoking between commercials on TV, so when a commercial came on I would go straighten the linen closet, or my shoe rack, or the pantry, or my sock drawer. I kept my hands busy and my mind occupied with a task so I could ignore how badly I really wanted a smoke. It all worked eventually, but it was not easy. The Allen Carr book was helpful in the explanation of the little monster who lived in my head, demanding me, telling me, lying to me, that I "need" a cigarette. We need food, water, shelter, community. We do not need cigarettes.
I really do understand where you are coming from. I hated that I smoked. It's like we are outcasts in society and get dirty looks from people who are so much smarter and better then us. We are banned from buildings, and are just generally lowly people. I also really, truly believed, with all my heart, that I would never enjoy my life again without my little friend. I feared not having them when I was stressed. I needed them after all. But again, it is just a lie. So here is the truth: Stress will always be part of our lives, period. Whether you smoke or not, the cigarettes add no value, do not fix problems, and hurt your health. It's easy for others to look at a 600 pound person who eats all day and is going to die. Why don't they just stop eating? It's killing them! Or in your case, being diagnosed with COPD, knowing it is from your addiction. Why don't you just stop? It's killing you! It sounds easy to say unless you walk in your shoes. So @peacelovejoy, I do understand. I did walk in your shoes. And I pray you find the will to live your best life, free from the little liars as soon as possible. Make today be your last day spent serving your cigarettes, and tomorrow a new beginning. Free. The feeling of being free from them is amazing! Every year in January, I add up how much money I saved from not smoking. In my case it would be around $1,000. A year! Anyway, I buy myself a little something. Like a pair of boots. Or a pretty new outfit. The point is there is absolutely NO downside to quitting. You save your health, which is the most precious commodity, you save money, you feel better, smell better, and life is better. You know the downside. Nobody has to ask you, 'don't you know what you are doing to yourself?' Of course we know! We are just slaves to the little monster inside our head. Quitting changed my life for the better in ways I can't describe to you. Oh how I wish the same for you!
After you learn that cigarettes are just liars, what do you think will be the biggest obstacle you face?

@karukgirl
Just read your story and advice and will be sharing with my 74 yr old sis. She and I both started smoking in our early teens and I finally found my “way to quit” after smoking for 48 years. My husband and I were able to do it together tho each of us had different methods. By July 4th, 2016- we had both smoked our last puff of tobacco! We could not believe we did it!
Have given tips to my sis over the years but your post will really impress her. Thank you for sharing this.