My wife has been diagnosed with Mild Cognitive Impairment

Those early years before and after diagnosis were hard. My husband, who had always been a loving, kind and agreeable type person seemed to flip in personality and was becoming angry over the smallest of things. He could misplace a hammer and would get so worked up at me as well as himself. I would get so upset with him for accusing me of always being mad at him or hollering at him when I wasn’t or I didn’t. I would stay so frustrated trying to figure out what was wrong with him. When an incident happened in front of my sister and later a friend, I knew I needed to get him checked out again. I had been trying to tell his doctor for nearly two years something was wrong, but the doctor would just laugh it off and attribute his symptoms to normal aging. He was finally diagnosed with MCI. I wish I could say things immediately got better but it took some time. The medicine helped and his realization that there was something medically wrong helped him to work through that time. His diagnosis has since moved on to Alzheimer’s/possibly Lewy Body too and we face different battles now….Try to be patient and understanding with your wife. She really can’t help it. Walk away for bit to settle yourself when things are hard. Learn all you can about her condition. There is a lot of info on line, buy the book “The 36 Hour Day.” It will help you to understand most everything that you will face. Mayo Connect Support Groups are awesome. It helps so much sharing/learning from others who are on the same journey you and your wife are on.

Dear David:
Good for you reaching out to get support, so important. Very, very sorry for the loss of your son.
My husband started with an MCI diagnosis and now it's dementia.
Regarding your marital worries, just from my experience (before I knew what was wrong with my husband), I thought we were having trouble in our marriage due to his behavior and the way he started acting towards me: no more kissing, touching, hugging, no affection, no birthday cards, no empathy, no conversation.
Once we had a diagnosis I gave up on the idea of marriage counseling, because he just is not in an emotional or cognitively stable place to understand what is happening. So, we remain friendly roommates.
The loss of our relationship the way it was is hard to bear. I don't think I've necessarily arrived at the acceptance stage, and am still angry and frustrated on a daily basis (but it's lessening).
The caregiver classes I take have helped so much. The more understanding I have of dementia the more it helps me respond appropriately (sometimes 🫠).
All the best to you. 🫂

@davidwinkler8 Like the others said, just read, read, read and yet there's always new behaviors to cope with.
I'm sorry for your loss of your son.
My husband & I will be married 53 years in June, MCI diagnosed 1 1/2 years ago, but I can look back many years before that at my notes to myself and see the clues before I knew that there were clues. I just couldn't understand some of the behaviors that he was exhibiting. He gets angry, as well, says I'm always on him about everything and that he just has to face that I just don't love him any longer. It's so difficult that they see our behaviors so differently and there's nothing to do about it. It's even harder when they have so much of their cognitive abilities, still, but yet so much missing, and that is what we are left to navigate through.
This site is the greatest place to read others' and write your own trials and tribulations.
Good luck to you.

I have been having memory issues for the past few years, more anxiety and then started with a short temper, my husband was concerned and I went for an Alzheimer evaluation. The result was a Mild Cognitive Impairment diagnosis which has helped me to recognize when I am struggling. My husband and I have been married and best friends for 54 years and I worry about his future. My mother and several aunts had Dementia so I know what it looks like but now I understand how they were feeling. Right now I am healthy and keeping up with our lives.