Pancreatic Cancer Group: Introduce yourself and connect with others

Hello from Chula Vista, California,

I was diagnosed with PDAC 3 weeks ago (3/6/26) during a hospital stay. They haven't staged it, but as far as treatment goes, my 3cm undifferentiated malignancy is "borderline resectable." Plan is to do 6-8 rounds of mFOLFIRINOX, then try to resect, then more chemo. All new to me, and I'm trying to keep my head above water. I recently moved from Maryland to SoCal after a fall Semester at Sea, turned 67 on December 30th, retired January 1st, started Medicare on Feb 1st, and started having GI symptoms on Feb 10th. My chest port will go in this Friday, April 3rd, and I've asked my brother to pre-emptively shave my head this weekend. A new voyage underway, for sure.

Grateful for this community as I get started with both treatment and retirement. Thanks for taking me in when I'm not a Mayo patient, but need community. I'll be reading all your questions and comments!
Warm regards,
Mary D

@gvk911 You have had a bit of a journey to get here huh? Hearing the diagnosis can be quite a gut punch. Have you been able to catch your breath a little yet? The conversation with the oncologist determines your next steps correct? Do you have an appointment for that conversation or is it just sitting by the phone waiting for the call?

After about three years of getting progressively sicker and unintentionally losing a lot of weight, I was diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer in 8/22. It spread primarily to my liver and some bones. Due to the spread, surgery wasn't an option. I have been living on chemo since. I get treated at Mayo in Phoenix. I got a folder of information during my diagnosis oncology visit with a mention of Mayo Connect. I lurked around for a few months and learned so much from others. It confirmed that I was fighting for my life, and we are better than me. So, I decided to contribute my journey to hopefully help others by being part of their we. I also learn something new every day here, and it is nice to have a group of peers that can relate to what I am going through. In addition to helping with the medical side of things, it also helps with the mental and emotional side of being a cancer patient. At times, I find them to be equally if not more challenging as the physical obstacles. Until you get the diagnosis, you really don't know what it is like.

@tomrennie
Thanks Tom. I was lucky enough to get an appointment with an oncologist tomorrow. His receptionist called me and asked if I could fill a cancellation. I might be crazy but I am not stupid, well, not that stupid, so I took the appointment. Yes, I knew that pancreatic cancer was one of the worst and I did not think that I would be getting it, but here I am. Hopefully I can make it through. I am sure that I can! Right now I feel good, but now that I know that I have pancreatic cancer I can feel a burning sensation in my stomach sometimes when I am eating. I think that it is just my mind thinking about my pancreas but this is a question for my doctor.
So you are coming up on four years. Hoping that you are feeling fine. Next week I will get back to you and inquire more about you. Thanks again.

@tomrennie it’s still a battle I’ve got an appointment Thursday and I’m going to speak to my physician and ask for a referral. I appreciate everyone on this platform. It’s encouraging, I don’t speak of things around my family they don’t want to know ( I think it scares them) so I keep it all inside.. I’m really hoping to get some answers sooner than later. Thank you

@tomrennie it’s still a battle I’ve got an appointment Thursday and I’m going to speak to my physician and ask for a referral. I appreciate everyone on this platform. It’s encouraging, I don’t speak of things around my family they don’t want to know ( I think it scares them) so I keep it all inside.. I’m really hoping to get some answers sooner than later. Thank you

Hello from Chula Vista, California,

I was diagnosed with PDAC 3 weeks ago (3/6/26) during a hospital stay. They haven't staged it, but as far as treatment goes, my 3cm undifferentiated malignancy is "borderline resectable." Plan is to do 6-8 rounds of mFOLFIRINOX, then try to resect, then more chemo. All new to me, and I'm trying to keep my head above water. I recently moved from Maryland to SoCal after a fall Semester at Sea, turned 67 on December 30th, retired January 1st, started Medicare on Feb 1st, and started having GI symptoms on Feb 10th. My chest port will go in this Friday, April 3rd, and I've asked my brother to pre-emptively shave my head this weekend. A new voyage underway, for sure.

Grateful for this community as I get started with both treatment and retirement. Thanks for taking me in when I'm not a Mayo patient, but need community. I'll be reading all your questions and comments!
Warm regards,
Mary D

@tjberryi My husband doesn't speak much either 💔 I try to engage in any way I can just to try to help him open up. Anything to understand how he's feeling. At times I feel guilty if this makes any sense? That I'm not having to deal with all that he's endured these last 18 months. I told him as much also. That I at times can't imagine how hard this is for him.
I feel for you also . Anyone you can talk to? Sometimes people need time to deal with the reality of all this. It's so hard for all involved. 🙏

@casey1959 It is so hard for all involved especially initially. My wife asked me a few years ago, when I was really sick and beginning treatment, what she could do to help. I responded that I didn't know. I really didn't. I was scared for my life, and I didn't know what to do. She left my "sick room" crying, and I laid there crying. My wife is a problem solver by nature. Her inability to "fix" my cancer problem, and watching me suffer, was extremely difficult for her. I know that she felt guilty about it. I felt guilty for destroying our dreams. When we were 28, we got married and moved from the Philadelphia area to Arizona for job opportunities. We had a dream for our lives together. We worked hard, built good careers, adopted kids, saved money, and planned for an enjoyable retirement. At 56, I ruined our dreams by getting cancer. She now felt the added responsibility of paying for my medical bills. Neither of us really knew how to handle it let alone talk about it with each other. Those initial conversations always were emotional and not helpful for either of us. It took a lot of time, tears, and patience on both of our parts, to get better and dealing with it all... together. We still struggle, but we are way better at it than we used to be. Last night, we actually talked about trying to be happier right now. Enjoy today. We don't know how many more todays that we will have together. We need to plan for the future, both good and bad, but we need to cherish the time we have now. It was a calm, rational, surprisingly joyful conversation. I don't have any answers for you. Like I have said, the mental and emotional challenges of dealing with cancer can be far more difficult than dealing with the physical challenges. Can anyone else relate to any of this?

@tomrennie oh my yes yes yes. I'm in tears right now. Our current issue. Bless you both.

@casey1959 I cried a lot typing it. I also have learned that crying with others beats crying alone. This time, my tears were good tears. Our dog gets upset when we cry. He crawled on my lap trying to get me to stop crying. Ever try to type with a 75 pound dog sitting on your laptop? It worked. I stopped crying and started laughing. Even the dog has learned how to help us cope better.