Does anyone feel old and useless with age?

There is no age requirement for getting old. Some are old before their time while others stay young beyond their years. I am turning 67. When I was young that seemed very old. Now not so much. I don’t think I ever grew up or some say have common sense to acknowledge I’m older and to slow down. I stay engaged not because I have too but want too. It helps being physically fit with somewhat of sound mind. But for me pushing my endurance or testing my abilities both mentally and physically adds an element into my life that enriches me. Drives me to accomplish things that is personal and gratifying. It is hard with family who either will not support you or understand what we go thru as we age. We are loving capable people still able to do great things. Sometimes we have to stand up to be noticed for who we truly are.

Dear Rashida, I too grew up in a very negative background. My mother starting selling me when I was 4 years old to older men for money, as I grew, yes, I was quite physically attractive, however quite ugly emotionally. I learned, all too late in life, not to live in the past; but to live in the present and what is left of tomorrow. Do I slip every now and then, sure I do; but what I now know is that it is an extremely dark place for me to live out my final days in. Outward appearance is way too invaluable my friend. My outward appearance has now turned into paralyzed body parts, blood disorders, bone replacements, blindness in one eye, and on and on and on. My inner appearance is growing into a beautiful and wonderful path, which I have learned to treasure and share. Thank you Rashida and please do NOT give up. YOU, have given this lady a great deal of joy today.

@dianestjohn I was reminded of that when I came across this illustration, which I have shared here but repeating in case you have not seen it:

Simply Thank You. Truly Beautiful. Most importantly, so are you...

I’m 61, divorced after a long marriage, struggle with anxiety. My 23 year old twin daughters still live with me and they lack ambition and drive, so I’m coaching them along because this is my time. I’ve watered everyone’s garden but my own. It’s my time now, for however long. You’re not worthless, your life is not nothing. You a marvelous creation of love, curiosity, and spirituality. I learned long ago that someone else’s opinion of me is none of my business. I don’t do bullsh*t anymore. Like the lady interviewed on television, “Ain’t nobody got time for that.”

I've only begun looking at this support group but have been utilizing Mayo Connect for a year or more. I am also suffering from insomnia which I'm sure is a result of my increasing anxiety and depression . I suffered from GAD all my life but it's much worse now and is becoming intolerable. I turned 84 in January and as my physical issues are also advancing I am less and less able to cope with anything. I have had a few days recently when I was "losing it" which really frightened me . I have just begun therapy with an on line psychologist , knew I had better do something quick. Have only had 3 sessions so far; hope this will help. I am overly cautious, no surprise there, about meds & supplements so read pros and cons on rxlist.com before I consider taking . I'll check out these three that you suggest. Thank you very much. From a fellow Arkansan.

I feel so so sorry for you but you really think an online psychologist is going to solve your problems?
SSRI’s have been around for years and I discovered them when Prozac was on the cover of Time Magazine. Finally I had a name for what I had been suffering from since my freshman year in college.
I immediately called my PCP the next day and said this article was describing me and my mother who made my childhood miserable.
Unlike my mother who denied she suffered from depression and continued to self medicate with alcohol I immediately called my PCP who ironically was my mother’s PCP and had her prescribe Prozac for me. Unfortunately Prozac didn’t react well with my brain and I tried Zoloft/ Sertraline. I had control of my life back and the roller coaster I was on finally stopped. Later I met with a psychiatrist who added Buspar, Bupropion and Klonopin. I have been taking all three for over 30 years. Yes I have been taking the same dose of Klonopin for thirty years and I have never increased the dosage or suffered any side effects.
People have to start taking control of their own lives or they can die like my mother still medicating with alcohol and denying she had a problem.
It took a toll on my brother and sister and I swore it would not take a toll on my own family. We all have choices. Instead of demonizing all the drugs that can help you find the right ones and take them.
I wish you all well.

I'm 64. Retired due to medical issues. 4 years ago I was in a wheelchair then a walker then a cane. Now I go to school to assist others with mental health challenges. I can walk 32000 steps in a day unassisted. In 2022 I registered as a kidney donor for a specific recipient who no longer needs a kidney. I stayed on with Mayo and the 31st of this month we begin evaluation procedures. Staying active is crucial to mental health. Physical and mental activities that challenge you, can create opportunities that lead to a fulfilling life. Regardless of your condition, you can always challenge yourself with new goals. My first goal was leaving a wheelchair. I accomplished this by standing up, then sitting back down. Soon I was able to do this without using my hands on the armrest. My second goal was taking 1 step forward, and one backward. It took well over a week to be able to do that. I moved my walker away from my wheelchair and had to take a step to get there. It was amazing when I could reach the bedroom door on my own. It took months to get off the walker and on a cane. No matter how simple these goals may seem to others, and to our old self, we face new challenges never before imagined we would face. Motion is medicine. Psychosocial strengthening by joining groups of people facing our challenges can help immensely. You are not alone. There is hope. You must remember those 2 things. I would urge you to research mental health clinics in your area. You are never alone in this challenge. You got this.

@trooperdogg1960, you are a living testament to the truth and validity of the old Chinese proverb that says "a journey of a thousand miles begins with one step."

P.S. - I also liked your comment on your profile about not wanting to go to the afterlife with two good kidneys. 👍

Thank you for the kind comments. I discovered I've been practicing neuroplasticity without knowing it. Learning new things, adapting to new physical challenges and talking to others and myself in new ways, rewire the brain. When we stagnate physically and mentally we stagnate emotionally. Intentionally rewiring neurons, synapses and connections by exercising them, we expand the use of our brain. I use my right hand to practice Iaido when I am left handed. This is a form of exercising neuroplasticity. My mind has to think differently. I once suffered from depression and anxiety. That statement is a form of neuroplasticity also. As I used to say I suffer, I now say it in a past tense. This rewired my thoughts and brings a positive reinforcement as opposed to a negative reinforcement of stating I still suffer. How we talk to ourselves is extremely important. Taking a different route to the store, trying a different flavor, even doing everyday chores in a different order can exercise your mind. Very simple things can lead to dramatic changes. Be kind when you talk to yourself. Because you are listening.