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Heading for a scan
Read my full story elsewhere. I am sure @moonboy has endured more, and there are other survivors. Survivors. Please remember that when reading.
I was 58 and asc aortic aneurysm at 6.5cm. My aorta dissected into my heart, into the valve, into the cardiac artery, and all the way down to my legs. No one wants a dissection.
I don't think it was the pain of it, the feeling of my heart being run through by a flaming sword, and the panic, and the "holy sh*t, I am going to d*e" feeling. But for me, and I cannot speak for all, it was the suddent overwhelming feeling that "this is it, and I am not ready".
It also doesn't help to have ZERO knowledge and understanding of what the friar tuck was happening, and the non-appearing ambulance, and the "drive yourself if you want to survive", and the worse imagining of the car in a ditch somewhere on the side of the road and my panicked wife not knowing what to do.
But we got there. Well, she got me there. Heaven is definitely missing an angel. To a hospital at 1am, with the night shift crew, and my poor wife biting her lip the whole time while my future was unknown. We didn't even know I was having surgery, until they asked us what kind of valve I wanted.
So, the ascending aorta was replaced, and a valve, and the root - and I have found out it was a Bentall's Procedure, but I still have the rest of the dissected arch and descending dissection which is medicinaly managed and lifestyle changes are supposed to help.
And people, quite nicely thank you, tell me I was "lucky I didn't know what was coming", or "a blessing not knowing".
But with surgery I had a 20-30% chance of major organ failure, a 20-30% chance of stroke, and a 20-30% chance of d*ath (I put in the * but we all know what I am talking about)
I was 58 and male, no other indicators of anything. The checklist was a complete column of NO/NONE. Diabetes, cholesterol, smoking, alcohol, obesity, disease. Nothing.
But there I was knowing that in five minutes it was going to happen, and five minutes before that thinking that I was going home to decide on what type of valve I should have.
I was in the ICU waking up after 2-3 days in a coma, testing my feet and hands still worked - delirious, delusional. Told by follow-up nurse later that stroke "is common".
But now I know more - I am prepared. Now I can weigh up the chances. I can say it's either 100% d*ath or 30% d*ath. I know which one I would choose.
I am not going to argue this point - I have been on the other side, and it is not good. I am through it now, but I wouldn't have changed it.
For me I don't think it is about choice. I think it is about being prepared.
I have a scan scheduled for six weeks from now. There's still the arch and the entire desc aorta. Last time it was about 3.8
Am I worried? Gee, of course I am. Can I do anything about it? Not really, except live my life better than it was before. Good, clean foods, a little exercise, and less stress. Keep taking five meds to manage it.
I am heading for a scan early April.
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Amen brother.
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1 ReactionYour story is...inspiring? I certainly admire your approach: humor without minimizing the danger. I hope your scan proves reassuring and you and your wife can sleep easy for a good while longer.
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1 ReactionMay the angels continue to hover over you and all of us on this journey. Thank you for sharing. Good vibes coming your way in April.
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2 ReactionsThank you for sharing your story of a complex and challenging journey. Do you mind me asking how long the ascending aortic aneurysm was present before it dissected? Did it start out much smaller? I recently found out I have a dilation of my aortic root and ascending aorta, hoping it remains stable.
I have no idea. It was perhaps years? I probably had signs along the way. I remember for a few years...
Feeling of blockage after eating - like food didn't really go down. I loved meatballs and often had some discomfort to the point that I could not lie down. I had to jump in one spot, thumping my chest until I got some gas out and the food went down.
Two weeks before I played with the kids and it was noticed "gee you are out of shape". I was tired and breathless. And often tired and needing to "just give me a moment".
I put it down to "just getting old".
All these things I remember now that seemed food related but as many have said, it was crowded in there.
The pain on the night was because something had to give - without the pain then I wouldn't be here. I am told the aorta has no pain receptors, and is a reason why dissection often goes unnoticed.
I am glad for the signal, but it is like shooting a signal flare and starting a forest fire.
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1 ReactionAll of us. Survivors, and those waiting to get their surgeries. And those considering alternatives.
Change lifestyles to suit.
I have a known condition and I understand it. And there is a lot to manage.
But everything can help. The rest is up to us.
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1 ReactionAh then that is my humor and I don't mean it. I spin the tale and make it a little lighter.
But the milk is spilled.
Do you know where I am from? We say the obvious negative of a lot of things.
If you have been here then you can understand.
Dissection? That's gotta hurt.
See? It helps us play down the seriousness and get things done.
I think all of us here are in a twilight zone. The world situation isn't reassuring, my husband has dementia, and I have this wretched heart. And I've got it easy compared to so many. There's more but this isn't an agony aunt column. Facing such challenges certainly does focus the mind and if you can't laugh, you will surely cry. My heart goes out to everyone. So to speak. Ha.