How do you handle uncooperative and manipulative behaviors?

@cmiddlet, I'm sending you a hug today, just in case you can use it.

Hi
My husband was diagnosed with lbd mar 9. He also denies, rants and yells. Says he is getting second opinion. I hear your concerns and feel your pain.I never know when his switch will flip. It is very hard to live with the up and downs.
He found out I am on a support group and he read my comments and concerns because I forgot to log out on computer. He was angry a out that too. Some days I want to run away.
I am going to therapy now and have an outlet to talk.
I hope your days get better. It is so hard.

My husband was diagnosed mar 9 with LBD. He finally got on an antidepressant and that helped for two weeks. Now he is acting and saying exactly what your husband is doing. Some days are a real struggle. I spend hours on the phon e getting appts for what he needs. I drive him to cardio exercise 4 days a week. He is angry. Our sons have tried to help saying it doesnt do any good to be angry. Lets deal with it as best we can Dad.
Yesterday he had calmed down.
I feel for you as it sounds like u have younger kids. I started therapy last week. It was nice to have an un evolved ear.
I hope today is better for you.

I feel for you. I don’t have near the trouble you have, but you need to get away for a little while somehow. I know it helps me. Getting away helps rejuvenate . Even though you don’t know what you will find when you get back.
Good luck and God bless

@ranch is absolutely right. Even a few hours away a couple days a week can be so restorative. I tried doing it all myself for a long time and soon was becoming a basket case myself. When I learned to say, “yes” to any offer of help and I hired someone to stay with him for just a few hours each week while I run errands, go to Bible study, have lunch with a friend, or even by myself!, I began to feel that I have a life too and it makes me an even better care partner. It makes doing what we do, doable, without losing our own identity.

this is year three (or is it four?) of trying to be a supportive wife AND a caregiver for my husband who sounds very much like your patient. A nurse friend of mine said i need to find time for myself.
check your local resources ... somebody for half day a week will lighten the load; also support groups like this one will allow you to vent. hang in there ... you are not alone. good luck.

Good advice, @sanchasg1. Finding time for yourself is easier said than done. Getting respite care so you can take a half day for yourself is wise. Do you find that you end up using that time just to get errands done or do you also make sure you do something just for you?

This group has helped so much. It can be so isolating at times. The kids get out of school June 8 and I'm hoping that he can stay with his sister for awhile this summer so I can take a break for a couple of days with the kids.

One of the things I worry about is making the kids grow up too fast. They take on alot of responsibility and it would be hard to manage without them. It will be nice if his sister does take care of him for a couple days.

My husband who has lbs just got his license back yesterday. We live in small town so he had to only drive on two streets. It was a medical exam. I am nervous. I wont ride with him.
He is now arguing a out his “mind altering” drugs. He is on esitlopram. It was increased to 10 mg from 5 mg. He says he is going to stop. He wont follow thru on filling out his medical directive. He wont choose a medical or financial poa. He says I am after his money. He says I am trying to cut him our if his decisions.
Last week I found out he didnt take all of his pills one am. There were two left in container. I found one on the floor at my daughters house. She has kids and a dog! So now I am putting the pills in a dish for him. I am going to set up mtg with lawyer with kids without me so maybe he will do what has been asked of him. He is very stubborn. I think if I am out of the meeting maybe that will help him to move foreword.
It is hard as I have been the one to do all dr appts. Get him to his cardio. Set up all the driving appt he needed to do. Set up dr appt. We have an neurology appt may19 at mayo. I am pretty sure my husband is going to dump on me to dr. It was a hard day yesterday. You hate to bother your kids who are busy in their lives. Thanks for the ear hear. It is comforting to read and learn from everyone

my mom is hallucinating and paranoid. Accusing my father (67 year marriage) of leaving her and having kids with my sister and niece, etc. it is absolutely crazy but that is her reality. She worries and cries so much. So i get this. You have to explain to the kids how to handle this. it isn't your husband there if he wasn't like this before. It is hard on everyone to understand to divert and disengage. You cannot reason with the unreasonable. You cannot argue or try to persuade them. I keep telling my 86 year old father this. he tries to reason with my mom "don't you want to be dry/clean" "i am right here not going anywhere" "there is no one else here" "your parents have been gone for 40+ years". etc. He says she is being unreasonable, or uncooperative. Thisis just her reality. She isn't trying to be difficult. She sees/hears/believes things that are not reality.

Can you sneak meds into some food for breakfast or lunch? grind it secretly and make him eggs and put it into the omelette or soup etc?