Downsizing, To Move or Not to Move? That is the Question

Posted by Rosemary, Volunteer Mentor @rosemarya, Apr 12, 2020

At some point as we age, we will have to make a decision about leaving our homes and downsizing. Maybe in our own town or to another town. Maybe to smaller home, condo, apartment, or assisted living/senior community.

When the time comes to downsize, seniors can struggle with a multitude of emotional, physical, and financial challenges.

How do you make an informed decision about when to downsize?
What tips do you have to share?

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Aging Well Support Group.

@alison0

Well I’ve given in. Yesterday I put my house on the market. I am going into a retirement village if the house sells. I am very sad but the stairs and the quiet have defeated me. The fact that everyone appproves doesn’t help. I feel like screaming this is a head decision not a heart decision. Been here for 25 years. Never thought of a bedroom downstairs then.

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@alison0 It really is such a difficult decision. Our hearts want to stay where we are but our heads tell us there are so many reasons to downsize. If you have a large home the upkeep must get expensive, even just heating it must cost a lot, I know it does for us. We have been in our home for 35 years so part of our problem is the accumulation of "things". Our kids are married and live in different states but much of their "stuff" is still here.

If we ever do manage to get rid of stuff and move the one difficult thing will be we will probably move to a smaller home in a development with an HOA (Homeowner's Association to take care of some general upkeep outside). Most of those homes are two bedrooms and although our kids are not often here at the same time they generally are twice a year for a short time each time. That will be much more difficult in a two bedroom home.

I understand how you feel. Not having to deal with stairs will be helpful though and you need to put yourself first.
JK

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Thanks. That’s exactly how I feel and having signed the documents I’m crying. Having the family is no problem, lots of b& bs close by
I hate being a widow and everyone says I need company!
It’s true that COVID broke many links but I am re establishing them
I just don’t want to go

Warm regards

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@sueinmn

It is so difficult to even make the decision. We have been here nearly 40 years, only a few original neighbors left, but the same thing that drew us then is still here, but more so. The surroundings are lovely through the seasons and convenient. But the house and gardens are for someone younger, with stairs everywhere, and lots of outdoor tasks.

When we came home from our tiny house in the Spring, I was really ready for less - space, yard, work, stuff...
So we have begun to clear away, bit by bit - just seeing more cleared out space makes me rest easier. And each time we clear an area, it makes us look for the next one to do...
We put out the word that we are looking for the ideal property, but aren't in any hurry. I realize now that I need a small plot of land to have a few plants and a place to relax, so we know we need a townhome.
I have begun to locate people to help with tasks we no longer can or wish to do. Fortunately, the paid for house means we have a little to spend for those services.

Sue

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If you have a patio or balcony, you can still have plants. Good luck in finding a townhouse that you love.

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@alison0

Well I’ve given in. Yesterday I put my house on the market. I am going into a retirement village if the house sells. I am very sad but the stairs and the quiet have defeated me. The fact that everyone appproves doesn’t help. I feel like screaming this is a head decision not a heart decision. Been here for 25 years. Never thought of a bedroom downstairs then.

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I have a ranch, bedrooms all on one floor but I'm still thinking of a retirement community. Why, well for one thing the community and house are designed with an eye toward an aging individual. What that means is everything is flat, no steps or stairs anywhere which is great for a walker or wheelchair. Also bathrooms have several grab bars and usually a shower that is handicap accessible. Doorways are also wide enough to get a wheelchair/hospital bed through. Now this is not to say that you will be in a wheelchair but accidents happen and it's nice to know that your home can accommodate your every need without doing last minute renovations. The community is also designed to be supportive, in that they usually take care of all snow removal, grass cutting etc. and have a center where you can meet others in your situation. Well, that's it for me...I wish you all the best !

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I have been investigating independent living and I am not amused. They charge a lot of money and for what? Something so small that I would not even be able to bring in my own furniture. The reason seems to be that they don't want you to stay in your small space, but be in their spaces which is why it is expensive. Have talked to at least six of these places and if you want any degree of comfort you have to spend a lot of money. So I am going to stay in my own home as long as I can. I have a very nice cleaning person who comes in once a month to do things I can no longer do. But on the other hand, I can still do a lot. I drive; I can shop; I can do my own laundry; I can do the dishes and clean the counters, etc. I hear the garbage trucks coming down the street. I can still get the cans in and out of the garage. The more you do, the more you can do. When and if I either lose mobility, have a stroke, or something like that, I will go to assisted living. But until then I will be independent as I always have been.

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@carolee888

If you have a patio or balcony, you can still have plants. Good luck in finding a townhouse that you love.

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Yes, that's what I have concluded. But it needs to be a townhome in our area - my friend gave up her townhome for condo living, ended up cycling through 3 places in 4 years because even when she had a patio, she was not allowed to place anything in the soil, not even a decorative hanger for her plants. She looked around for several months, and is back in a different townhome, with a small patch of earth next to her patio that she is allowed to use, within guidelines.
Sue

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@casey1329

I have a ranch, bedrooms all on one floor but I'm still thinking of a retirement community. Why, well for one thing the community and house are designed with an eye toward an aging individual. What that means is everything is flat, no steps or stairs anywhere which is great for a walker or wheelchair. Also bathrooms have several grab bars and usually a shower that is handicap accessible. Doorways are also wide enough to get a wheelchair/hospital bed through. Now this is not to say that you will be in a wheelchair but accidents happen and it's nice to know that your home can accommodate your every need without doing last minute renovations. The community is also designed to be supportive, in that they usually take care of all snow removal, grass cutting etc. and have a center where you can meet others in your situation. Well, that's it for me...I wish you all the best !

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Thanks. They also have a hospital

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Wow, this all sounds so sad.
I think it would be great if people simply united and bought a big building, had it fixed, arranged help (students maybe who want to live with little rent in exchange for help) and then continue with more fun. Could be the Golden Manor or something.

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@thisismarilynb

I have been investigating independent living and I am not amused. They charge a lot of money and for what? Something so small that I would not even be able to bring in my own furniture. The reason seems to be that they don't want you to stay in your small space, but be in their spaces which is why it is expensive. Have talked to at least six of these places and if you want any degree of comfort you have to spend a lot of money. So I am going to stay in my own home as long as I can. I have a very nice cleaning person who comes in once a month to do things I can no longer do. But on the other hand, I can still do a lot. I drive; I can shop; I can do my own laundry; I can do the dishes and clean the counters, etc. I hear the garbage trucks coming down the street. I can still get the cans in and out of the garage. The more you do, the more you can do. When and if I either lose mobility, have a stroke, or something like that, I will go to assisted living. But until then I will be independent as I always have been.

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I agree but I’m not very well and get frightened though I have support. I have decided just to spend the money for safety but it’s hard

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@sueinmn

Yes, that's what I have concluded. But it needs to be a townhome in our area - my friend gave up her townhome for condo living, ended up cycling through 3 places in 4 years because even when she had a patio, she was not allowed to place anything in the soil, not even a decorative hanger for her plants. She looked around for several months, and is back in a different townhome, with a small patch of earth next to her patio that she is allowed to use, within guidelines.
Sue

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Terruble, having plants do a lot for your well being.

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