1. < Caregivers: Dementia

Thank you for this support group

Posted by jimdianne @jimdianne, 4 days ago

My wife was diagnosed with aMCI about a year ago and, lately, her condition has accelerated. I am new to this caregiving thing so I really appreciate this support group. Her three sons (my step-sons) are within an hour's drive but at this point they haven't been needed for any serious assistance. I am alone in this new role of our lives and, at times, get anxious about what lies ahead. I have suggested my wife also join this support group. Thank you all for your posts.

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judimahoney | @judimahoney | 3 days ago

Greetings, I am in a similar situation: husband diagnosed with MCI about a year ago and still (mostly) cares for himself but has stopped doing most anything around the house and property unless I specifically ask him (and there is pushback sometimes if he doesn't feel like doing the chore or task, or maybe it's too hard or confusing now).
Sometimes I do not handle the changes very well, becoming the household manager, handling finances, taxes, repairs, etc.
I had an anxiety attack the other day, worrying about what will become of my husband and what to expect; how bad will he get?
I mourn the loss of our marriage and the loss of a husband who is now more like a friendly roommate.
I have no family close by, but check in with my sibs when I feel I'm struggling to cope.
Our local dementia support group meets monthly, so I hope you find some form of support for the bad days. Hugs.

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1 reply
jimdianne | @jimdianne | 3 days ago
In reply to @judimahoney "Greetings, I am in a similar situation: husband diagnosed with MCI about a year ago and..." + (show)
@judimahoney

Greetings, I am in a similar situation: husband diagnosed with MCI about a year ago and still (mostly) cares for himself but has stopped doing most anything around the house and property unless I specifically ask him (and there is pushback sometimes if he doesn't feel like doing the chore or task, or maybe it's too hard or confusing now).
Sometimes I do not handle the changes very well, becoming the household manager, handling finances, taxes, repairs, etc.
I had an anxiety attack the other day, worrying about what will become of my husband and what to expect; how bad will he get?
I mourn the loss of our marriage and the loss of a husband who is now more like a friendly roommate.
I have no family close by, but check in with my sibs when I feel I'm struggling to cope.
Our local dementia support group meets monthly, so I hope you find some form of support for the bad days. Hugs.

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Exactly. Thank you for your reply. I created a very simple chore list on the fridge split between the 2 of us and our beagle. The beagle's chores are 1) licks my dinner tray clean; 2) stay cute. My wife is keeping upstairs clean (including dishes), outdoors poop patrol, and emptying the garbage. I do the rest. She is doing well with this chart to look at. But I, too, mourn the loss of our marriage (yep, she's more a roommate now) and wish she had a social circle to turn to but she doesn't have any close friends and wishes to just stay home. I plan all of our activities and she happily enjoys them unless there is a lot of exercise involved. It is a lonely journey.

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judimahoney | @judimahoney | 3 days ago

Our dog has become my therapy dog. Most affection I get is from her, sadly.
She is super-cute, so your dog's job to stay cute comment made me smile. 🙂

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