Son with alcohol addiction

Posted by tiftdvm @tiftdvm, Jan 23 6:01am

My son is currently in the hospital with severe pancreatitis due to alcohol. This is bad..one of the "worst cases" they have seen. Yet every time they talk to him about rehab he says not interested. He has tried AA...says it makes him want to drink...Wekiva in and out patient. An online program that say alcoholism isn't a disease just a matter of decision..nothing works. Anyone know of any other times of rehab? Maybe after this he won't pick up another drink...but seems unlikely to me unless he gets help. Which I do know he has to decide. Just looking for some help that might appeal to him. Like AA for gamers maybe.

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tiftdvm @tiftdvm

First, he has to be serious about stopping for anything to help. Does he want to stop?
Second, does he know why he drinks? Is there a underlying problem he is trying to handle by drinking.

Too bad he will not consider treatment, it is more than stopping drinking, it is figuring out why and tools to help.

Other options:

AA - even if meeting he tried did not appeal to him, try different meetings.

Depending on where your son lives, here are other support groups beside AA he could check into. Does the hospital have a social worker or drug counselor who could talk to him about other support options?

Medications - there are medications that help with cravings or make you sick when drink (Antabuse) . But they only work if he wants to stop drinking.

Laurie

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@roch

tiftdvm @tiftdvm

First, he has to be serious about stopping for anything to help. Does he want to stop?
Second, does he know why he drinks? Is there a underlying problem he is trying to handle by drinking.

Too bad he will not consider treatment, it is more than stopping drinking, it is figuring out why and tools to help.

Other options:

AA - even if meeting he tried did not appeal to him, try different meetings.

Depending on where your son lives, here are other support groups beside AA he could check into. Does the hospital have a social worker or drug counselor who could talk to him about other support options?

Medications - there are medications that help with cravings or make you sick when drink (Antabuse) . But they only work if he wants to stop drinking.

Laurie

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Then we wait...he does not want to talk to the social worker. Nor does he want to speak to a counselor to try and get to the why. I can't understand it. But I do know there is nothing we can do until he decides. Just was wondering if any one had particular experience with any rehabs that might be recommended . Hard to go by the reviews since often the people in there don't want to be and the reviews are negative.
Thank you for your input..

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tiftdvm @tiftdvm

I have done rehab for alcohol. I had just been diagnosed with cancer and though I had always drank, the diagnoses caused me to try and drown my problems. Decided it was time to quit so I could be healthier prior to cancer treatment. Did at Mayo in Rochester. I was very impressed with program and it helped. They do both outpatient and inpatient, but it is not a locked unit. There are restrictions and structure, but people are there voluntarily. You are tested regular to make sure you are not using when leave unit during free time. Clients were all ages and with different type of additions. Clients are not just from Rochester area. Some are there because came to Mayo due to other medical conditions and part of treatment plan is need to stop addiction. Staff was physiatrists, psychologist and nurses. It is combination of group and individual therapy. You learn about the disease, talk about your history, why you use, tools to prevent relapse, etc…

It is not x weeks and done, they also make sure you have ongoing treatment after inpatient. Either at Mayo or other locations.

I went about 5 years ago, so not sure if still same structure.

Here is link with info:
https://www.mayoclinic.org/departments-centers/addiction-services/specialty-groups/orc-20560251

I have also heard good things about Hazelden Betty Ford locations. There is one in MN and other cities.

Laurie

REPLY
@roch

tiftdvm @tiftdvm

I have done rehab for alcohol. I had just been diagnosed with cancer and though I had always drank, the diagnoses caused me to try and drown my problems. Decided it was time to quit so I could be healthier prior to cancer treatment. Did at Mayo in Rochester. I was very impressed with program and it helped. They do both outpatient and inpatient, but it is not a locked unit. There are restrictions and structure, but people are there voluntarily. You are tested regular to make sure you are not using when leave unit during free time. Clients were all ages and with different type of additions. Clients are not just from Rochester area. Some are there because came to Mayo due to other medical conditions and part of treatment plan is need to stop addiction. Staff was physiatrists, psychologist and nurses. It is combination of group and individual therapy. You learn about the disease, talk about your history, why you use, tools to prevent relapse, etc…

It is not x weeks and done, they also make sure you have ongoing treatment after inpatient. Either at Mayo or other locations.

I went about 5 years ago, so not sure if still same structure.

Here is link with info:
https://www.mayoclinic.org/departments-centers/addiction-services/specialty-groups/orc-20560251

I have also heard good things about Hazelden Betty Ford locations. There is one in MN and other cities.

Laurie

Jump to this post

Thank you so much! We are here in Jacksonville so Mayo is close. I'll see if they have a program here. Right now..he is so sick he can't think about anything. And doesn't want to think about anything. In fact..the doctors say we are not out of the woods as on now so that the first step. Scary.

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John’s Hopkins in New York has had great success using psychedelic therapy for alchohal use disorder. You can look at their website. They are training therapist all over the country in the therapeutic use of psychedelics.

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I've been sober for 23 years now, and to found AA ineffective.
What worked in the end for me was mindfulness training. The reason why I believe this worked for is I believe addiction to a habitual reaction. This is another way of saying we're kind of walking exaggerations of nature instincts. That really doesn't contradict the disease model. In reality addiction is really complex and how ever anyone learns to view it that helps them is very good.
I believe it was Thích Nhất Hạnh, a Zen monk from Vietnam used to describe addicts as reacting with our habit instincts. I've learned I do have the power to make a choice not to drink but I didn't understand it until I learned to clear the clutter from my mind. The alcoholic brain is a marvelous creature always capable of creating an emergency out of nothing.
The short explanation why I believe mindfulness meditation helps addicts it slows us down and clears our minds enough to understand that we have the power to choose against our habit instincts. We don't have to drink no matter what the reason. We have the power to choose how we react.
There are several organizations who teach mindfullness meditation to addicts. Most our from the Buddhist POV. I'd start by looking up one called Refuge Recovery if this interests you. It is a disciplined approach that requires the addict to accept a fair amount of effort is required on their part, but it can be successful

REPLY
@pshack76

I've been sober for 23 years now, and to found AA ineffective.
What worked in the end for me was mindfulness training. The reason why I believe this worked for is I believe addiction to a habitual reaction. This is another way of saying we're kind of walking exaggerations of nature instincts. That really doesn't contradict the disease model. In reality addiction is really complex and how ever anyone learns to view it that helps them is very good.
I believe it was Thích Nhất Hạnh, a Zen monk from Vietnam used to describe addicts as reacting with our habit instincts. I've learned I do have the power to make a choice not to drink but I didn't understand it until I learned to clear the clutter from my mind. The alcoholic brain is a marvelous creature always capable of creating an emergency out of nothing.
The short explanation why I believe mindfulness meditation helps addicts it slows us down and clears our minds enough to understand that we have the power to choose against our habit instincts. We don't have to drink no matter what the reason. We have the power to choose how we react.
There are several organizations who teach mindfullness meditation to addicts. Most our from the Buddhist POV. I'd start by looking up one called Refuge Recovery if this interests you. It is a disciplined approach that requires the addict to accept a fair amount of effort is required on their part, but it can be successful

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Thank you so much for sharing. I have been listening to mindfulness exercises and think it really has a place. I will definitely keep this in mind for my son when he is ready!!

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@haneskay1

John’s Hopkins in New York has had great success using psychedelic therapy for alchohal use disorder. You can look at their website. They are training therapist all over the country in the therapeutic use of psychedelics.

Jump to this post

Thank you! I love all the suggestions!!

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I hope he quits before the damage is life threatening. I am embarrassed to admit that that is what it took for me to finally quit. He has to make up his mind that he is serious about quitting and follow through with it. Nobody can force him. An easy way to find other people is through online AA and there are many, many various groups. I found intherooms dot com the most comprehensive. He doesn't have to contribute or introduce himself just register an anonymous account and attend any of the multiple meetings at every day and time.

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@gratefulbob

I hope he quits before the damage is life threatening. I am embarrassed to admit that that is what it took for me to finally quit. He has to make up his mind that he is serious about quitting and follow through with it. Nobody can force him. An easy way to find other people is through online AA and there are many, many various groups. I found intherooms dot com the most comprehensive. He doesn't have to contribute or introduce himself just register an anonymous account and attend any of the multiple meetings at every day and time.

Jump to this post

More great advice for options. Well..he is currently in the hospital with acute pancreatitis and has been here for a week. Total organ failure that they pulled him back from the brink. If this isn't a awake up I don't know what is! But still..we never know do we?

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