Question regarding bypass surgery

Hi @happilyalive!
I think it's great that you are thinking ahead and trying to be the best caregiver you can be for your husband. It sounds like you have already been on this journey for some time...so just a little extra planning on your part.

The hospital nurses and case managers will likely go over all the things to prepare for his coming home.
I believe each hospital has similar but also different protocols for post op open heart surgery, so it's difficult to say with certainty what they will advise. And each and every person is different and will experience a different recovery.
Your husband sounds like he's been through quite a lot in his time here on the planet. The good thing about open heart surgery is they are so advanced now days compared to years gone by, that recovery's don't typically last as long as they did.
For instance, depending on how he's doing, they will get him up out of bed the first day. Movement and physical activity is really important. Being slightly impaired on one side may contribute to a more difficult time, but not impossible.
Diet is important after a big surgery like this.
Protein is important for healing.
For myself, my taster was off for the first couple of weeks and nothing tasted really good. Spicy or flavorful foods were gross to me at first. YUK!
You may want think ahead and maybe get some protein drinks.
Premiere Protein at Costco was a good choice for lack of appetite but needing protein.

A recliner may be useful for the first couple of weeks.
He won't be able to use his arm for much of anything.

Easy on/Easy off clothing.
Like t-shirts and sweat pants/joggers and slip on shoes. This just makes it easy to dress and be comfortable at the same time.

He may need a walker, which the hospital will determine. For stability in walking.

As for personality changes, I would say it is temporary. This is a big surgery. There is a lot of anxiety and fear associated with open heart surgery. For good reason. And sometimes the ICU experience can get to you.
All normal. All expected.
Again, for myself, I was so grateful to God that I survived. I felt like I'd been given a second chance at life. I was emotional about ICU at first, but being able to see how each day got better and better gave me hope and if anything, my faith grew stronger!
You need to take care of you too! Do you have family or friends or neighbors near-by that can help give you a break if you need one? I would say you are safe to leave him alone after a few days, but if you are used to watching him like a hawk, it may be hard for you to even go to the grocery store without worrying!
Do you like to read or have a hobby you enjoy that you can do while he's home? Something to get your mind off things and take a little break?

Wow, thank you for replying to this post. My husband already uses a walker to help him to stand and walk short distances. Anything beyond that is beyond what he can do. He is frightened about being forced into rehab but I truly think it would be the best thing for him to build a little more strength and to conquer some of the tasks he can now do such as standing for a short time period so I can help him dress, shower or even just walk. He also has LBBB and his blood pressure plummets which causes him to pass out often. I loved your advice on things to get and what to expect. It helped and still helps me to plan accordingly and to know what to expect. To answer your question, I have a daughter that will be visiting for a short time (3 days) before she has to return to her home and job. So, for the most part, I will be doing his care alone. We moved into our home two years ago and still have things to unpack so I'll be spending what time he is sleeping working on that. As for hobbies, my basement is loaded so it will also give me a short time period to start on at least one of them or donate some of them to a fellow hobbier. Just know that I greatly appreciate all of the advice, information and thoughts. If you think of more, then I'm here to listen and learn. Have a great day and I hope that you have fully recovered. Update me when you can on how you are doing now. Thanks.

Simply, I don't know. What you SHOULD look forward to is some kind of noticeable improvements if for no other reason than suddenly his body is being perfused with more oxygen and nutrient-rich blood. I expect, but again don't know, that his heart may be in hear failure due to the deterioration, and maybe his comorbidities are largely due to, or have been exacerbated by, his poor heart function. If the stents, and the team inserting them, find the magic, you may get a large chunk of your hubby back.
This will take time. He's already pretty beaten up, and now this. I would expect him to lean on you heavily for as much as two weeks, but maybe a lot less if the stents do their magic. Maybe a month....depends on how he rolls with it. I'm dealing with a sick wife, very-aged dad, and his partner who has been in hospital a week needing a pacemaker rather urgently. I'm run almost ragged. I'm no hero, but I learned in the military to put my head down, squint a bit, and just put my shoulder to the grind. It ends ere long.

I don't have a first hand experience. Yet I thought you might find this discussion helpful: https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/what-i-learned-from-my-open-heart-surgery-part-1/

Hi, Thank you for posting this link and story. I read it through. She was an excellent writer and all that she experienced came through clearly. My husband is reading it now. Beyond any doubt her advice in the article did help a lot. Thank you again and have a great day.

I love the thought you shared about how I may get a large chunk of my hubby back. I truly hope so as he is my soul mate. Watching the love of your life deteriorate is very hard as you truly do know. Being a caregiver is one of the most difficult things that many of us ever experience and I'm certain that you understand this. How is your sick wife doing and your very-aged dad and his partner? What you learned in the military is something that I can apply to my life and I appreciate your sharing it with me. That will probably be what I put on the next plaque beside of my bed to remind me daily. Update us with how you are doing and remember to experience one truly good thing daily, even if it's just seeing a tree change colors. Have a great day.

Thanks for your good wishes. The wife's cycle comes in waves, good days and bad. She was mostly good today, so we baked banana loaves. My Dad is surprisingly chipper, doing okay, misses his 'squeeze'. I took him to see his partner who is also bearing up, still awaiting a firm date for the installation of a pacemaker. We're told it could be as much as two weeks yet.
A shorter version of what I said earlier is simply, 'Git 'er done.' 😀

Thanks for updating me on how your wife, dad and his partner are doing. They are definitely very blessed to have you as their caretaker, husband, son and friend. I loved the "Git 'er done." That's going to be a favorite saying now, thank you. What do you do to keep yourself moving when you don't feel like it, happy when times are sad and always fully giving of yourself? I must admit that at times I just want to plop down on the floor and sob while most of the time I'm very patient, outgoing and always, always giving to help in any way possible. Finding a happy medium is difficult. Anyway, thanks for the update again and may all of your days be bright and filled with joy and happy thoughts.

I'm a different sort of animal. I have a range of interests and hobbies, and I'm active in them one way or another. I volunteer (shop for shut-ins at our grocery store that has a service for those clients. They phone in their order to volunteers, those get passed to we-the-shoppers, and we shop and check it out. They pay at the door a few hours later when it's delivered. I'm on the local board of Crime Stoppers as well.) I sing in a choral society, have several telescopes and do amateur astronomy, have a substantial garden, and go for fitness-effort walks when I don't feel tied to the house for my wife's sake. What I mean is, I am on the computer a lot, reading, listening, watching, learning. I learn all I can about my conditions, my wife's conditions, and so on....lots to keep my mind occupied. I'm also naturally contented, happy, as people seem to notice about me. I don't get despondent or rue my misfortunes. I feel that is too close to 'giving-in' for my liking. I wanna be in charge, in control, on top of things, and that necessarily means a busy mind, always doing something, always thinking...
Thanks for your good wishes.
As long as you have the energy and the Good Will to work on behalf of others, that's about the best prescription for happiness that I know.

Hi, I totally love your personality, drive, love for your wife as well as your morals and ethics. You definitely do a lot and I thank you for that. America needs many more people like you in it. Keeping up with a garden is extremely hard work but harvesting it is amazing. Do you preserve the food or pass it on to others? Either way, I applaud you and anyone that does a garden. Having fresh produce and enjoying the flavors of it, the abundance of how good the crop does and the cooking with it is very rewarding. Keep up the great work and keep us updated on your loved ones and yourself. May all of your days be amazing.