Problem Taking Showers

Posted by nscappa @nscappa, Apr 22, 2023

I have mentioned this sensitive subject in the past but it's not getting any better. I do have depression and I take Lexapro, Lamictal, and now Abilify. The Abilify really screwed me up re mania, insomnia, constipation, talking incessantly, etc. I switched to half a pill every other day. I mention the meds just so you would l know what I am taking. The issue with taking a shower is still a huge effort way too hard to get in that shower. Is anyone else having this problem? It's really upsetting because I have always been such an immaculate person re hygiene. I do live alone so that saves me somewhat. This is really a big problem for me. Any comments?

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I’m in the same boat. My medications have changed so much but nothing helps. I got covid on Nov 2020 and never recovered. I’m now a long hauler and have been home for the past 29 months. The depression and anxiety is wrenching. I too have issues with showers. It’s the last thing I want to do. Half the time I don’t even get out of bed. I even had a permanent shower chair installed so I don’t have to stand anymore, plus grab bars. I’ve fallen a few times. It’s just too much effort anymore. I too was a person whose hygiene was immaculate showering every single day, sometimes twice a day. Depression is evil

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Thank you for sharing your story and you do have a very difficult situation going on. The COVID long haul must be awful for you and I wish I could give you some help and I know about trying different anti-depressants since I have a very low tolerance to them. I am currently on Lamictal, Lexapro and Abilify (Abilify is new). Can I assume that you have gotten help from a therapist? You have plenty of things going on and I can certainly see why a shower is a huge issue for you. Falling is so scary and I have fallen a few times myself. You are doing the right thing by having a shower chair and grab bars. I am sorry you're going through this and it seems that the COVID really did a job on you. Do you live alone, have a support system, someone you can vent to. I find that talking to my best friend does help sometimes. I do wish you well and if you need to talk again please don't hesitate. : )

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Thanks again for your reply and you make a lot of sense. Funny that when I finally get in the bath and enjoy it I ask myself why was this so difficult? The brain has too much control over us but we must persevere. You are so sweet and I appreciate your caring. BTW, I'm 75 going on 76 on September 2nd, a true Virgo all the way. Thanks again! : )

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@ nscappa . Do not worry. You are not alone. Just take it one day at a time. I hate to shower too. (My shower is
small and I bang my elbows lol) I really don’t like to get sprayed wet. A bath is more enjoyable… bath salts, beads, and bubbles….i am depressed. It will take all your ability to do something. And u don’t have to do it. if u have a bath that’s the easiest (easier than a shower) just soak. But it’s not necessary. Do what u want. Maybe some deodorant. LOL that’s what I do. It’s hard. Ur not motivated to do anything. If u want
My cell # to text lemme know. C
When I hear others like you have the same problem I do…it does make me feel better (I’m not alone). I say i want natural oils to help hair and skin 😌. But you only make it one day at a time. There is not a schedule and you can do whatever you want in this world when u want. You’re free to do that. Most. 😌

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@nscappa

Hi Laurie,
Thanks for your comments. Actually, I do use the baby wipes and they suffice for a while. I know it's a block and it drives me crazy and seems like it shouldn't be any problem at all for me. I think about it all the time and I say today I'll take that bath/shower and I put it off until the next day and the next, etc. It just seems to be such a huge effort to get into the tub. I assume it is because of the depression. It happens re doing a wash (clothes), dishes, etc. I have to push myself more but it just seems overwhelming. Once I'm in there I enjoy it, go figure.

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I am exactly the sane. Showers seem like so much wk.

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@briarrose

I more than hear you. Taking a simple shower can be so anxiety provoking for me. I get it in my head that I "can't make it through the shower"...am "going to collapse" that kind of thinking. So now I have a shower seat and more grab bars. Sometimes my husband lays on the bed waiting for me. And, yes, those shower wipes are a good idea when it is simply too much for me. Obviously I have a severe panic disorder. I even think the "closed-in" feeling is part of my anxiety. Often I talk myself through it. I found taking a shower in the AM is better than the evenings - perhaps switching up your time might help. Do try positive self talk. "Wow, I am washing myself!"..."I can do this, I am almost done!" I have even "prayed" myself through a shower. If there is one thing I want to leave you with is...You Are Not Alone! Take it - a shower - one small step at a time.

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..you mention the closed in feeling and i leave bathroom door half open/half closed and tied back my fabric shower curtain and bought a really cheap see through plastic one - so when am in shower i can see the rest of the bathroom, it lets the natural or bathroom light in; even can still see door, mirror on wall etc. Have done this for many years and curtain is cheap enough to buy new one every few months... for anyone who finds it claustrophobic and doesn't have a glass shower door, this can be a cheap alternative

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@nscappa

Thanks so much for your comments. I just commented to someone else's comments and I did mention that after I do take a bath I do feel better and I think wow, that wasn't difficult at all. It does help me when you say that you are having the same problem. Any other things that are difficult for you? With me it's doing the dishes, washing my clothes, etc. Recently I started taking Abilify and I had so many bad symptoms that I had to take it every other day instead of every day. Granted, the mania was enjoyable you know, feeling alive and happy for a change but I still can't stop eating at night (I go to bed around 1:00 - 1:30 am, just a pattern I have gotten into since I don't have to work anymore so staying up just happens. Being on the pill every other day seems to put me back to how I felt when I was not taking it. Oh well, I will persevere and again, thanks so much for your reply. My nieces think that if they miss one shower it's a crime. : ) If I ever shared my issue about showers they would never understand so that issue never comes up.

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Please let your doctor know that the Abilify is not for you! There are too many really, really good medications out there for you to continue with one that causes negative side effects or that is ineffective!! We have got to advocate for ourselves!!

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It was interesting reading all the comments here. I'm in the same situation with depression however I also suffer from chronic pain so taking a shower is a last damn thing I want to do. I'm also a night owl it's not 4:35 a.m. and I have not gone to bed yet so what I'll do is stay in bed most of the day and stay in my pajamas and my robe until it's time for the next evening to roll around. It's a terrible vicious cycle and taking a shower is a huge huge effort for me I usually get one about every 3 days or if I have to go out for some reason. My mind tells me I need to get up I need to make my bed I need to get in the shower and I need to start a normal day like normal people but I can't seem to get past the depression to even start the process. Usually spring coming helps me a great deal when I get flowers planted and stuff like that but there's so much more I can be doing with my life that I'm not and the hard part is I really don't know why I'm not. Like someone stated here once I do get a shower I do feel better but it's such a huge effort to take a shower dry my hair put on a little makeup. I'll be 59 years old in July I just keep thinking about what it's going to be like when I'm in my '60s and '70s how am I going to survive if I'm this way now. So I understand all the comments here and for those of you that are struggling like myself I hope you find some direction as I hope I do too for myself. Thanks so much for feeling strong enough to voice your issues I know it's not easy to do. Thanks for listening.

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Hi Kate,
I just read your post and I'm glad that you wrote your story. Yes, I do have trouble with showers and I am 75 and I have had depression issues most of my life but they usually didn't interfere with my work. My depression worsened after I had a Hysterectomy at 41. Being in chronic pain, I can't even imagine what that this must be like for you, certainly adding to your depression. I truly feel for you and it seems that you are a definite pattern re sleep hours. I too am up until 1 or 1:30 am and I take Klonopin for sleep. May I assume that you are taking antidepressants and if so what are they? You do better than I re showers. I wish I could get one every three days to kudos to you for that one. Can you take pain meds for your pain (obvious question but I had to ask). Vicious cycles are difficult to change. I can relate very well to telling myself that I need to change the sheets, wash the dishes, etc., etc. I really have to push very hard to get outside and walk too which I know would be good for my mind and body. You certainly are not alone but you do have stumbling blocks which you just can't seem to get out of. What I sometimes do is go through the issues and tackle at least one each day. Yesterday I washed the dishes and today I am doing two washes and washed two others the other day. Cooking is a pain for m and being on a kidney diet really limits what I eat re salt. The mind is too powerful and can really get in the way. That's why I try to get at least one thing done and if I'm lucky, maybe two. I have a real block with washing the dishes but right now my kitchen looks great. I think your first step might be to try to get to bed earlier and I know this won't be easy. Why not read some other posts and see if they come up with some other ideas to help you. Take care and my best to you. : )

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@lacy2

..you mention the closed in feeling and i leave bathroom door half open/half closed and tied back my fabric shower curtain and bought a really cheap see through plastic one - so when am in shower i can see the rest of the bathroom, it lets the natural or bathroom light in; even can still see door, mirror on wall etc. Have done this for many years and curtain is cheap enough to buy new one every few months... for anyone who finds it claustrophobic and doesn't have a glass shower door, this can be a cheap alternative

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Thank you.
Very good suggestion, will try!

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