Communicating with others while they're drunk

Posted by Merry, Alumni Mentor @merpreb, Jan 29, 2020

Hi- My sister just called. She has a friend, who I know too, who is an alcoholic. Linn tells her to call back when she's sober but sometimes Linn can't tell. NO, this is not me, this is a true story. How should my sister react, say, do? Any ideas?

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Jim, Volunteer Mentor | @jimhd | Jan 30, 2020

Hi, Merry. I had a friend who would sometimes get drunk, and a few times knocked on my bedroom window in the middle of the night. I went to the other end of the house and sat in the breakfast room and listen to him. It would take a while to get him talked down to anywhere close to sober.

I'm not implying that your sister should do that. Has Linn talked with her friend about her problem drinking, suggested AA, or getting into a detox?

If the calls are annoyingly frequent, she could have her phone number changed or have the friend's number blocked. Maybe Linn could initiate a phone conversation on her own schedule. Or maybe find an appropriate greeting card and write her friend a note expressing her concern for her. I guess what she does depends on their level of friendship.

Jim

Merry, Alumni Mentor | @merpreb | Jan 30, 2020

In reply to @jimhd "Hi, Merry. I had a friend who would sometimes get drunk, and a few times knocked..." + (show)

Thanks Jim. Sounds good. I'll pass this along.

Lisa Lucier | @lisalucier | Mar 5, 2020

Hi, @merpreb - I think that @amberpep @klmz @moncrdeb @olivia22819 @trainwreck54, due to personal/family experiences with alcohol, may have some ideas on how to communicate with someone who is drunk, such as in the example you shared about your sister's friend who calls while she is drunk (or potentially so), and how your sister might respond.

Does this friend also call you, @merpreb? What did you suggest your sister do in communicating with this friend when she calls?

Merry, Alumni Mentor | @merpreb | Mar 6, 2020

@lisalucier- The conversations have stopped between my sister and her "friend". My sister stopped speaking to her friend until she got herself together. Her friend has never called me. I don't like her, sober or drunk.
I told my sister and I advise others that if anyone calls while they are not sober to be steadfast in saying that until they are sober not to call. Screen calls if possible.

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