Pain and personality change

Have you been reimaged after the surgery?

Thanks for the feedback but my answer is no and I have no intention of doing so. As I stated depression is not one of traits. I wanted to address the fact that often major surgery has side effects that are not physical and not readily noticed. After seven years of being jerked around with many theories I've learned to live with the fact that there are things, like thousand of others TKR recipients, I can no longer do.

I've had a total of 5 knee surgeries, with the last being what I thought was going to be a total replacement in November of '18. When I woke up after the surgery, the first thing my wife said to me was "they only did a partial replacement", which shocked and then angered me. I'd already had 3 other operations on my left knee, so I wanted to hear the doctors reasons for only doing a partial.
He told me that the interior portion of my knee looked better than the posterior did, so he decided that a partial was good enough. That was 7 years ago, and I'm still having problems with my left knee, as well as my right. Pain, swelling, weakness, tightness, all of the usual osteoarthritis issues, even on the "new" side of my left knee.
The surgeon who did the partial has since retired(again), and as of right now, my right knee is a bigger issue than my left. My new(and old) Orthopedist has looked at it and told me that I'm on my way to a total replacement, if I lose 30 pounds first. How are you supposed to be able to lose weight in any short amount of time when you can barely walk for more than 15-20 minutes at a time?
I'm beginning to think that I might be done with what our insurance company calls "specialist" doctors, and just live the way I am and deal with the pain for the remaining years that I have left to live. I've been dealing with this crap for over 10 years now, and I genuinely don't know if I have another 10 years left in me. My dad died when he was 73, and our mom was almost 77 when she died. Our older sister was barely 64 when she died almost 5 years ago. I'm 66, and have 2 younger sisters, both in their late 50's.
I'm just tired of everything, and every day it's exactly the same thing.

Hi Ouch89,
I'm sorry that you are having the problems that you do with your knee replacement. That's awful. However, I think it's perfectly normal for you to consider things like how far you would have to walk and are there stairs etc.? When you are experiencing pain, these things are important. Your family and friends could be more considerate in this also. But often they aren't or they just don't understand. Their attitude is usually, "Well, you had surgery so you should be fine." I've seen this with my family also when my mom and my husband were both so ill.

Think about the things you can do and like to do; such as reading a good book, watching a good TV show, baking cookies to name a few and offering helpful suggestions to people on the Mayo Forum; especially those who have had the same experience that you have. I'm sure you have a lot of expertise to offer with what you've been through.

Also just ask God for help. He's there for you. Just talk to him like he's your best friend and he is! You don't need to go to church to find God, although church is very nice. Just pray and he will be there to help you in whatever way you need. I will say a prayer for you also.

I wish you the best.
PML

@ouch89
I agree that most doctors and surgeons do not address mental health with chronic pain or surgical procedures. My personality has changed with my health decline and multiple surgeries due to chronic spine pain affecting sitting, standing, walking, lifting, etc. I used to love to dance and was very independent but now very limited on what I can do. I am in my mid 50s and not sure what it will be like in the future. My quality of life is definitely affected and not sure how it will affect my lifespan (feel like I am in my 70s-80s most days).

I do try to focus on what I can do and antidepressants help some. There was a point I couldn’t get out of bed or off the couch due to depression. Chronic pain does rob you of your former self. I need to focus on my new normal which has helped me move beyond dwelling on what I have lost vs. looking at new things I can do which I haven’t been able to do before because I was too busy (spend more time with my teen son, read, watch movies/documentaries, take online courses, participate in webinars, listen to music/podcasts, enjoy my dogs/cats, volunteer when able, take naps, walk my dogs slowly, sit in my yard to enjoy nature/my flowers and watch the birds/rabbits/squirrels, talk to my neighbors, etc.).

@ouch89 So many times we go forward with a procedure expecting it to really help us get a better quality of life. And sometimes it does, for a while. Or, it doesn't live up to the promise we thought. Or, there was a reaction or circumstances that led to less-than-satisfactory end results. Dang it all, anyways, right!? We get all ramped up emotionally and mentally for this, and it falls down around our ears.

I experienced what you have, when trying to get a solution for my right knee. It is bone on bone. I am not a good surgical candidate. So, I tried for a radio frequency ablation, after trying a genticular block to see if things would work out. Things have not worked out since the RFA in November. So disappointing! The pain is back, worse now. Like you expressed, noticing changes in how discomfort affects my decisions to involve family in outings, knowing my movements are slower/more complicated just makes me feel worse.

Have you considered what you might look at for relief? Do you think acupuncture might help? It's an avenue I am willing to try.
Ginger

I did consider acupuncture but after researching I discovered there is little scientific evidence for explicit effects, also if you do get relief it is only temporary. If you google "acupuncture risks," you'll find the list is long with some serious consequences. As stated in one of my posts I've accepted my condition. I've concluded that I'm not willing to waste any more time and energy chasing elusive treatmments with a risk of more pain. If two of my Orthopedists can't explain what's going on, it would be foolish for me to self diagnose.

Our insurance doesn't cover acupuncture, of course, but my GP told me that at best, it's effects are only temporary, like you said.
I'm at the point in my life where I've been poked and prodded and shocked multiple times, only to get no results. In other words, no direct cause can be determined, sorry.
10 years of our lives, and our time, and our money, only to get no results, and basically indifference from my neurologist, who very soon after seeing me for the last time, retired.

I hear you. I don’t want to hear one more person tell me that they know someone who had knee replacement and it went great, or that other people who had TKR are further along at this point than I am. Luckily, I have a PT who has told me that everyone who gets TKR responds differently, and that comparing myself to others only hurts me. Depression and anxiety have set in. Going out anywhere and ending up in pain is not enjoyable for me or the people I’m with. Due to pain, scar tissue, and stiffness (already tried manipulation), I still can’t drive so I’m mostly home bound. No meds are making this better. What I need to get my life back is my mobility back. No one prepared me for this battle. All I heard is how happy I will be when my bad knee is replaced with a good one. Right now, happiness seems out of reach.

You never hear about patients who don't have wonderful lives after having knee replacement surgery, only about how much better you'll feel. I've had my partial since '18, and that knee is just as painful and full of fluid as it was before the last surgery.
Of course, with the appliance in my left knee, they can't drain the fluid due to the risk of an infection now.
Neither one of us got the result we were hoping for.