Non pain related personal discussions

Posted by medic7054 @medic7054, Aug 25, 2017

I am strongly considering opting out of this forum. I, on average get 20-30 emails per day by people using this as their own personal “chat room. I thought this forum was for CHRONIC PAIN SUFFERERS discussing their pain issues and various treatments. Not talking about their darn DOG, among other non pain related. These people are giving me more pain.

@jenapower

I’m not sure who actually started this topic, but thank you. I agree it should slow down the general introduction Chronic Pain subject thread, and give people a place to get to know each other better.

Hi Hazel, now everyone can talk about our furry friends who help support many of us each day. Wish we could post pics of each of our pets, but I can’t figure out how.
Happy chatting, Jennifer

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Justin I would like your feedback on a post I just put on this site. We need some rules. It is all explained in my blog.Marie (MARIELD65)

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I suggest you scroll to the top of this thread where you just posted and look at the title. I didn’t start this thread, I just made one comment to be kind. I’m sorry you can’t see that.

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@jenapower

I suggest you scroll to the top of this thread where you just posted and look at the title. I didn’t start this thread, I just made one comment to be kind. I’m sorry you can’t see that.

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Then the forum got changed, I didn’t know about it, so where is the chronic pain forum, and why did I get the email? Sorry, but I am so upset. Marield65

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@jenapower

I suggest you scroll to the top of this thread where you just posted and look at the title. I didn’t start this thread, I just made one comment to be kind. I’m sorry you can’t see that.

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Jen how do I get my reply to the other forum?

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Marie, I truly am sorry you’re so upset but I’m not a moderator. I didn’t start this thread, and I don’t like getting yelled that. I posted one kind post and it set off all hell breaking loose. I’m not answering anymore, I’m done sorry. Get one of the real moderators to help you. Im truly surprised that a thread put up after this idea was already discussed on a thread, and people said it was a good idea on that thread in the Pain forum, would cause this much grief.

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I have enough in my real life to deal with, so I have taken myself off the chronic pain forum. Good luck to everybody on their problems.

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@jenapower

I have enough in my real life to deal with, so I have taken myself off the chronic pain forum. Good luck to everybody on their problems.

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Same here, Marield65

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@jenapower

Marie, I truly am sorry you’re so upset but I’m not a moderator. I didn’t start this thread, and I don’t like getting yelled that. I posted one kind post and it set off all hell breaking loose. I’m not answering anymore, I’m done sorry. Get one of the real moderators to help you. Im truly surprised that a thread put up after this idea was already discussed on a thread, and people said it was a good idea on that thread in the Pain forum, would cause this much grief.

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I wasn’t yelling. I am so sorry to upset you. This is part of being “in charge ” . You are the closest person we have to respond to and I also wrote to the moderators. I hope you don’t leave but if you do,have a great, and peaceful life. You are not in charge, nor responsible for this mess. Stay cool. Marield65

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I am truly sorry about people leaving the forum rather than having those who are interested in more of a ‘chat’ forum beginning one. I have been following so much of the chronic pain input and skipping the ones that are not relevant for me, such as those discussing their pets. I understand that for many people pets play an important role, but for others they do not. I too would prefer a separate forum rather than feel bombarded with topics that are not of interest to me, but are to others. I have learned so much from people writing about their experiences with chronic pain, treatments that work, ones that don’t, etc. Please don’t give up writing in this forum. There is so much to learn from one another, to feel validated, and to feel we are understood by each other.

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@jenapower

I’m not sure who actually started this topic, but thank you. I agree it should slow down the general introduction Chronic Pain subject thread, and give people a place to get to know each other better.

Hi Hazel, now everyone can talk about our furry friends who help support many of us each day. Wish we could post pics of each of our pets, but I can’t figure out how.
Happy chatting, Jennifer

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Hazel, I am with you!  I have six rescue cats whom I adore.  My wee Cole is going for a radiation treatment at the Vet School in Fort Collins, CO, because he has been diagnosed with Lymphoma.  @marylou705

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I guess it takes 24hrs for my preferences to change for this forum. I did take myself off, but I got the last batch of email.

Believe it or not when I talked to the moderators, we tried to come up with ideas of how to solve the massive email situation. We came up with 3 ideas,
1) to put up this thread just I already explained, to talk to each other about anything.
2) set up your email Inboxes with a special folder for Connect.mayoclinic.org email. When you have a specific email folder, with keywords like the name of the email, your email program should deliver all email from Connect directly to that folder and not just to your general inbox. This no Inbox flooding. This would eliminate any mayo clinic email from entering your general inbox, directing them straight to their own folder. You can then go through them at your leisure.
3) Set up for the digest version of Chronic Pain or any other form that you are interested in. That gives you one email with all the subject forums listed. You can open only the ones you’re interested in. You can set it up for exactly the number of times per day, per week, or whatever your timeframe that you want it to come.

If you do any or all of these things, you shouldn’t have a problem. I don’t feel that this forum is a place where anybody should be getting mad at anybody else. It’s not productive and it makes everybody on edge when they already don’t feel great. Remember all of us are dealing with some type of difficult illness. Maybe if we all try and come up with solutions and offer them, instead of just complaining it will work better for all. I’ve been trying to do this and I am not a moderator. I’m just another pain patient, and I’m doing the best I can.

Hazel, Millie is a 10 yr old Cocker Spaniel. She is a real sweetheart. I’d have more dogs like you, except my husband isn’t a dog lover so we keep it to one now.

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@jenapower

Marie, I truly am sorry you’re so upset but I’m not a moderator. I didn’t start this thread, and I don’t like getting yelled that. I posted one kind post and it set off all hell breaking loose. I’m not answering anymore, I’m done sorry. Get one of the real moderators to help you. Im truly surprised that a thread put up after this idea was already discussed on a thread, and people said it was a good idea on that thread in the Pain forum, would cause this much grief.

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Marie, I’m just another patient, I’m not ‘In charge’ of anything other than just what I post.

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Dear @medic7054, @jenapower, @marield65,

I am so sorry you are upset. I’m the Connect moderator for this weekend, and I definitely want to try and work out a solution together with you, that suits you.

Connect Is an online community where patients and families can share their experiences, find support and exchange information with people who’ve faced similar experiences. Every member deserves ongoing support – and at times it may go beyond health or medical support. As a moderator, I often see posts that may not be related to our group, but it could be the case where that person feels comfortable enough with the other members to “drop in” with a message or a comment. And sometimes, it may not even be a question, but perhaps a need to just participate and connect with another person.

On the other hand, I completely understand that this can be frustrating when trying to follow a specific conversation, members get put off by the interruption. You were spot on in suggesting that it may help if a moderator tries to redirect the unrelated post/comment/question.
There are some incredible conversations taking place in these groups on Mayo Clinic Connect:
– Mental Health: https://connect.mayoclinic.org/group/mental-health/
– Just Want to Talk: https://connect.mayoclinic.org/group/other/
For example, in this discussion, “Anyone Else With PTSD?” https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/anyone-else-with-ptsd/, members also talk about the invaluable support and love they get from their pets.

On a personal note, with my large Indian family (imagine “Big Fat Greek Wedding”), I find that conversations go off topic all the time. That’s the intrinsic nature of conversation, isn’t it? What I’ve also realized is that in those ‘meandering’ moments, I (sometimes) really connect with that person, maybe on a different level, or maybe on a deeper level, because I feel he/she is comfortable enough with me to “let me inside.”

@medic7054, @jenapower, @marield65, you are such an important part of this community, and you contribute to making it a welcoming, safe place. It is our sincere hope that you will continue to express your feelings, and share what’s going on at any moment – so that Connect can continue to be the supportive community that it has always been.

I hope this helps, and I apologize for being so long-winded, but thank you for bringing an important topic to our attention. Please let me know if there are any questions we can help answer. Let’s keep talking.

Kanaaz

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@marield65

This is suppose to be about chronic pain.

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Marie, the moderators have given us various ways of reading the Mayo Connect posts. I think you can avoid reading any personal observations. Just take a look at the main site or at the digest and avoid the topic “Non pain related personal discussions.” In regard to what medic has said about not being interested in “hearing anecdotal references to Uncle George’s problems”: ALL of our postings are anecdotal. What works for one person for pain may not work for another person. So, medic and Marie, why not avoid a topic that gets you upset?

I think the forum is very helpful. For those who don’t, for whatever reason, he or she can sign off. What I’d love to see is more politeness and civility. Yes, we are ALL in pain. But we are all humans on the other side of the computer screen. Please, let’s just be polite in a very impolite world. Thanks.

Just my opinion. Or perhaps “just my anecdote.”

Hazel (@hazelblumberg)

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@jenapower

This is been discussed and one solution that was offered was for anybody wanting to just chat to start a subject in the chronic pain forum that was titled something like ‘Just wanting to connect for support’. I’m not sure if anyone’s done it though. I agree it’s too many emails.

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There is a “non pain related” discussion area. Anyone can go there, and anyone can avoid it completely.

Hazel

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