My dad has to have open heart surgery. I'm so scared

Posted by zooeymat @zooeymat, Jan 9 9:42am

Hello, my dad who is 72 and healthy had some heart palpitations in the last few months, and last week he did echo and they found out his mitral valve is in severe state.
They wanted to do an open heart surgery next week, but will probably do the minimally invasive surgery instead (to repair the valve). I trust his doctors but I am still very stressed.
Did someone went though this? Are you alright?

I am so scared I can't think of anything else and I just cry all the time and can't concentrate. I am about 100% more stressed than he is.

Any advice or encouragement will be appreciated

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I had open heart surgery for mitral and tricuspid repair in 2021. Everything went great! I had the surgery at Mayo in Rochester, Mn and can’t say enough about the medical staff and care there. In my opinion they are the best. I was home in 5 or 6 days. I was 69 when I had the surgery. Best of luck to your
dad.

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@zooeymat Welcome to connect .I had triple by pass surgery in 1996 Never have had a problem had echos and other test since then Its what he does after surgery that makes the difference.Listen to Dr.,eat right ,exercise,and trust your Dr.,be in the right frame of mind ,he ll have no problems we just had a guy 82 have open heart he is doing fine.You,ll survive.

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@zooeymat My mom had triple by pass surgery in her mid 80’s and then a couple of years later a pacemaker. She has diabetes and is currently 91 yrs. and still going. Yes it is scary but sending prayers for both of you🙏🏼

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My situation is different from your Dad's, but I'm a 54 year old woman and I had a cardiac myxoma (tumor) removed from my heart on June 1, 2022 at Mayo. The surgery was a success but the recovery was alot more than what I'd planned it to be. It was done robotically, and while it was a faster recovery than open chest, I was weak for quite awhile. Recently, I found out that I have a severe leaky tricuspid valve, so they are monitoring me for that. I'm hoping that I won't have to have another surgery, BUT this time I'd be a bit more prepared for what recovery will be. Just take it day by day….Each day gets better after open heart surgery. The best part is finally being able to sleep laying down flat! Take care and my prayers are with you!

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Hi. Sorry that you are scared about this. It’s understandable. From what you say, it seems that your father is not having open heart surgery, though that was considered as an option. The minimally invasive surgery he is going to have is an amazing procedure. I had one five years ago to replace my aortic valve, and I was up and walking the next day, and had almost no recovery. I was definitely scared before. It’s helpful to imagine and believe that it’s going to go well. Patients often use breathing and Guided Meditation and maybe you could do the same to envision a successful outcome. Remember, the doctors and nurses do this work all the time and they are very good at it.

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Hi @zooeymat, I had a mitral valve repair, open heart surgery, in 2019, when I was 68. From a pain perspective, it wasn't a bad surgery. I was in the hospital for two weeks after because I had some complications, but I got good care and got through it. It took a while to recover, I didn't really need in-home care, got some help from friends with grocery shopping, etc. as there are restrictions on lifting, and when I had the surgery, driving. I was still caregiver to my husband who has dementia through all that. Now my heart is totally fine. I'm so glad I got the surgery when I did. Wishing you and your dad the best!

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Thank you all so much for your replies! You helped me a lot.

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@zooeymat

Thank you all so much for your replies! You helped me a lot.

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One thing I wanted to add, @zooeymat, it's important for you to stay strong for your dad. He will have to stay strong for himself, so best for him not to have to worry about you. He is fortunate to have such a kind caring daughter who is there for him.

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My mother went through open heart surgery when she was 74, in 1999. She lived another 14 years, until she was 88. Of course we all have to face a parent’s passing at some point. I did a lot of reading and prayer work to help myself face that fear in preparation for when that day would come. When it did come I was at peace with her passing. Blessings upon your journey.

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Thanks for you comment. I’m going through this possibility also and your comment I’d very helpful.

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