Mourning who you were before diagnosis

I am 34 weeks in and still waiting....,I haven't heard a peep, must be in a non urgent pile in the NHS.I was in hospital with Radiculopathy and slipped disc after falling over and neurology did tests when I was 2 1/2 weeks in hospital. I had fallen previously and spent 2 nights in another hospital. I did an emg after my release which found chronic neurogenic changes in right vastus medialis which is from the Radiculopathy but at this time last September neurology didn't know of my new fibromyalgia diagnosis. The letter on my discharge said I would be seen in clinic in due course. 😳I still don't think they know of my fibromyalgia and recent fall and low speed RTA with lorry.
They have probably took one look at my medical records and run a mile.
I have been through most hospital departments because I have been so unwell searching for an answer. I was definitely a different person more than 5 yrs ago and the contrast is vast. You are right to feel how you do as it's damn hard for people without fibromyalgia to understand. I think just one day in our bodies would make them more understanding. I was even told by my GP that they didn't have the capacity to sort me out when I had a serious reaction on my pregabalin and amtripuline, I was stuttering my words very badly. I was told to go to north Middlesex walk in centre which didn't exist and is apparently being built. I only wanted advice on whether I should reduce meds, instead spent ages in A and E only to be told I was correct in believing rare reaction to tablets and I could reduce them. I mourn perhaps for the NHS as with all these new things being added to my medical records you would expect someone would hurry up my neurology appointment but the different departments don't seem to communicate. I told my GP about the RTA and falling in my garden and no one seems to cotton on that this could have damaged my back more . I am beginning to think my Fibromyalgia diagnosis means," ah she's ok just chronic pain so needs tablets treatment ."
I think I am mourning the old me that didn't need to go to GP / hospital for help.Actually looking at how I feel I think I am becoming less positive each and every day.
This illness plus any others that we might have really starts to drag us down the longer it goes on.
I just hope there's a miracle and someone wakes up to help us all.xxx