Marital issues post kidney transplant

By all means it may be helpful if he saw someone himself. A difficult time in your lives but counseling for him , for you guys as a couple and even for yourself may all be helpful. But especially for him on his own. Hang in there. Best of luck.

I am sorry to hear your relationship has become stressful after transplant. I hope you are both able to navigate through this difficult time. I found this article and hope it is of some small help. Wishing you better tomorrows. https://renalrenewal.com/mental-health-after-kidney-transplant/

Sorry to hear this but please be patient with him. There are so many side effects to the transplant and also to the medications, and it takes longer than 5 months for the body to adjust. Definitely talk to his team about his mood/personality changes.
Good Luck 🤗

@maggieinfp is right. It is hard to overstate the effects transplant meds have on the body. I can remember the mood swings, depression and feeling so disoriented. One moment I was laughing for no reason and the next I was crying uncontrollably. I can remember talking out loud to myself and feeling embarrassed when my wife would ask me who I'm talking to. I know another transplant recipient, who bought the same set of headphones off Amazon and stacked them in the corner of his room. 200+ of them! Yet another bought dozens of outfits online and she never opened a single package. I used to think I was tough but and resilient, but those meds literally broke me. FYI, most transplant recipients I know felt mostly normal after a year.

If I could give both of you a hug, I would be right there! I am a kidney recipient and am closing in on 9 months. I want to encourage you but also tell the truth. The side effects of the drugs have been hellish. In my saddest times, I have wondered if I would ever see the normal side of life again. Your husband really needs to be part of a support group either in person or online. There he will see that he is not alone in this strange, medication afflicted state. Individual therapy for both of you is also important, of course. And then, you really need to talk to your docs about what is happening. Your husband's medications can...be...changed. The docs need concrete examples of what is happening. Start writing them down. Many transplant recipients believe they cannot change their meds due to fear of rejection. This is only partially true. God be with you.

I'm 16.5 years out from my transplant but I'm wondering if your husband is taking prednisone. I only took it for 5 days when I first had the transplant but that was it. Since it's a steroid, seems it could be affecting his mood. Of course, living with someone else's body part in yours is sobering. I mostly lived in fear of doing something to cause a rejection. Truthfully, that fear has never really gone away for me but after 16 years, I'm a little less fanatical about it.

I agree with the other posters who are advising discussing with his doctor. And examples are always helpful. I started with tacrolimus and mycophenolate but had to move to myfortic due to the mycophenolate side effects. Ended up with worse side effects from the myfortic and was switched to Imuran. That was very stressful (switching my antirejection meds) but that was about 8 years ago and the kidney is doing fine. (I'm still on tacrolimus as well.)

What I remember the most was being cold all the time; mostly in my hands and feet. Taking a shower was painful when the warm water would hit my feet. Had to take my showers in the early afternoon. Drank a lot of hot tea. It helped.