I wish I could cry!!

Posted by aliali @aliali, Mar 22, 2019

I am pretty sure you realize that feeling which accompanies depression- unexplained crying.
1. Is it better for a depressed to cry or not to cry?
2. I cannot cry; I am irritated and about to cry but cannot cry. I helped myself remember bad memories to cry but it didn’t work. Whatdo ypu recommend?
3. What triggered my enxplained crying?

@lisalucier

Hi, @aliali – that is an interesting observation about being depressed and unable to cry, and wondering if it's better for a depressed to cry or not to cry.

I remember when I was in graduate school, @aliali, that a counselor I saw right after my parents' divorce told me he thought I was just diverting myself from my sadness (e.g., go out to a movie with friends when I was down) versus actually allowing myself to be sad and cry, etc. — to sit in my sadness, so to speak. This was a bit of a revelation for me, and also told me something about how I was raised — really not to cry, if possible. When I really made an effort to not divert myself and try and feel my deeply sad feelings, I found it gave me much more relief and I was in much better touch with where I was at emotionally.

I'd like to invite @christine72 @lorena1egas @healthytoday @helenannmarie55 @stacyrobertson6 @rascal1 into this conversation for their thoughts on crying in the midst of depression.

Wondering, @aliali, what the prevailing thought in your household growing up has been regarding crying. Was it acceptable? Were negative emotions "allowed"?

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I well remember it; in our society crying is shameful ! I have prevented myself from crying for years; I was depressed and didn’t know that and felt the desire to cry again and again. But I force myself NOT to cry because, as I thought during those days, it as a weakness sign and shameful, especially for a male individual

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Hello @aliali

I am sorry to hear that you have been raised to think that tears and crying are shameful. Actually, tears can be quite beneficial. Here is a link to an article from Psychology Today about the healthy benefits of tears. Just click on the link you can read the entire article, https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/emotional-freedom/201007/the-health-benefits-tears

I will copy one paragraph from the article that you (and others) might find helpful,

"Emotional tears have special health benefits. Biochemist and “tear expert” Dr. William Frey at the Ramsey Medical Center in Minneapolis discovered that reflex tears are 98% water, whereas emotional tears also contain stress hormones which get excreted from the body through crying. After studying the composition of tears, Dr. Frey found that emotional tears shed these hormones and other toxins which accumulate during stress. Additional studies also suggest that crying stimulates the production of endorphins, our body’s natural pain killer and “feel-good” hormones.” Interestingly, humans are the only creatures known to shed emotional tears, though it’s possible that that elephants and gorillas do too. Other mammals and also salt-water crocodiles produce reflex tears which are protective and lubricating.

Crying makes us feel better, even when a problem persists. In addition to physical detoxification, emotional tears heal the heart. You don’t want to hold tears back. Patients sometimes say, 'Please excuse me for crying. I was trying hard not to. It makes me feel weak'."

I would encourage you, @aliali, to read the entire article. It might help you to feel free to cry when you need to.

Maybe you could think of tears as good medicine?

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Thank you for information on crying and the benefits. I am finding that if I let myself cry, it helps. I'm finding it hard to live with the memories of my son in regard to his suicide. I just posted that I looked at his pictures this weekend and am having flashbacks .

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@aliali

I well remember it; in our society crying is shameful ! I have prevented myself from crying for years; I was depressed and didn’t know that and felt the desire to cry again and again. But I force myself NOT to cry because, as I thought during those days, it as a weakness sign and shameful, especially for a male individual

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Why do so many public speakers when they tear up, say "I'm sorry." ?? I don't get that.

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Hello, @aliali @georgette12 @merpreb @healthytoday @skelly20 @lioness @rascal1 and @lisalucier and all others who join this discussion.

Another volunteer mentor, @johnbishop, recently shared this website on the resilient option. In one of the videos Dr. Amit Sood about how tears are healing to our body and our spirits. Just scroll down to the video titled, "Can Crying Be a Good Thing?" https://www.resilientoption.com/

Will you share how this made you feel about your tears or about the tears of others?

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@hopeful33250

Hello, @aliali @georgette12 @merpreb @healthytoday @skelly20 @lioness @rascal1 and @lisalucier and all others who join this discussion.

Another volunteer mentor, @johnbishop, recently shared this website on the resilient option. In one of the videos Dr. Amit Sood about how tears are healing to our body and our spirits. Just scroll down to the video titled, "Can Crying Be a Good Thing?" https://www.resilientoption.com/

Will you share how this made you feel about your tears or about the tears of others?

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Those are good thoughts in the video on crying, releasing toxins and inflammation.

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@hopeful33250 Great article and agree how it will release toxins But the teats just won't come ,dies sweating replace it lol I do this alot

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@rascal1

My heart is with you.

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Thank you Teresa!

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