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How to set boundaries with an adult child who threatens suicide?
My adult son has been diagnosed with PTSD, anxiety, and depression. We think (and he does too) that there may be some bipolar tendencies, but he won't get help anymore. I am trying to set boundaries with him, as he calls me several times a day, and can be very demanding, and if I don't help him feel better (I just don't know how to sometimes, and also I have a lot of other people in my life I care for and need me) then he can get extremely mean with me. If I try to get off the phone instead of hearing how horrible I am over and over, then he has incredible meltdowns. Today when I had to get off the phone because I just couldn't take hearing his cruelty anymore, he sent a video of himself to my husband screaming and crying hysterically, because he knew my husband would show me. And wrote cryptic texts like he doesn't want to see us for months, but he probably won't make it anyways as he wants to die. I think this is manipulative, but what if it's real? How do you set healthy boundaries with someone who is suicidal?
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I am so sorry to hear that you are going through such a difficult time. Unless you live it you can’t really know what a person is going through. It’s sounds to me like he want to hurt you as though you are to blame for his mental illness. I have all of what he has as well and I would like to ask you , what has caused his PTSD as I have had a lifetime of trauma from mainly my abusive upbringing from birth - 16 when I left home. So what has caused his PTSD? Now you do not have to answer that it’s not a question. Did he have a traumatic experience somewhere along the line. These are things you need to think about and definitely set boundaries WITHOUT feeling guilty because there is nothing you can do if he REALLY wants to commit suicide you’re only postponing it and it really sounds like the anger is aimed at you personally. I am not blaming you at all, it just sounds that way. Also if he has stopped treatment what can you do. For your own sanity I would suggest that you report this to your local authorities and have him committed to hospital where he will be forced into treatment because he is a danger to himself and possibly others. It’s a tough road to travel and he may hate you for it but once he gets the proper effective treatment Will will come around. Best of luck to you and your family and I will pray for you all. God Bless!
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