How about a laugh, (hopefully)

Posted by Leonard @jakedduck1, Dec 31, 2018

I believe laughter is the best medicine. Laughter has actually been scientifically proven to help people with depression issues.
Let’s give it a try so we can all get happy and feel better. Many Epilepsy forums I’ve been on had joke sections. I was probably the biggest joke of all since I didn’t get a lot of the jokes. They said the jokes couldn’t be above 4th grade level for me to understand them so my jokes may be rather simplistic but let’s give it a try.
Have a lovely day everyone,
Jake

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@lu91

Mrs O'Reilly went to the doctor and he told her to come back with a specimen .
Well, she didn't know what a specimen was so when she got home she asked her husband who was sitting in his arm chair reading his paper and smoking his cigar. Distracted he answered "I dunno, ask Mrs. Casey down the hall. She claims to know everything."
Half an hour later she came back. Her dress was torn, her hair was mussed and her lip was cut.
"What happened to you?" the startled husband asked
"I went to Mrs. Casey and she was busy doing a jigsaw puzzle so she hollered at me "Go pee in a bottle"."So I said to her to go crap in the lake and the fight was on!"

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This is the best one yet. I can't stop laughing. LOL!

Keep them coming everyone. Good medicine.

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@jakedduck1

God Said, "Adam, I want you to do something for Me…"
Adam Said, "Gladly, Lord, what do You want me to do?"

God Said, "Go down Into that Valley."

Adam said, "What's A valley?"

God explained it to him. Then God said, "Cross the River."

Adam said, "What's a River?"

God explained that to him, and then said, "Go over to the Hill....."

Adam said, "What is a Hill?"

So, God explained to Adam what a hill was. He told Adam, "On

The Other side of the Hill you will find a Cave."

Adam said, 'What's a Cave?'

After God explained, He Said, "In the cave you will find a woman."

Adam said, "What's a Woman?'

So God explained That to him, too. Then, God said, 'I Want you To Reproduce."

Adam said, "How do I do That?"

God first said (under His breath), "Geez....." And then, just like everything else, God explained that to Adam, as well.

So, Adam goes down Into The valley, Across the river, and

Over the hill, Into the Cave, and finds the Woman.

Then, in five minutes, he was back.

God, His patience wearing thin, said Angrily, "What is It Now?"

And Adam said.... "What's a Headache?!

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Another great one!! Didn't realize I could laugh so much on a medical forum. You guys made my day!

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@adr
Yep, there is nothing like laughter.
Helps your heart, depression, immunity, reduces stress and pain, makes you happy, lowers blood pressure and has other benefits.
Have you heard the pharmacist joke?

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@jakedduck1

@adr
Yep, there is nothing like laughter.
Helps your heart, depression, immunity, reduces stress and pain, makes you happy, lowers blood pressure and has other benefits.
Have you heard the pharmacist joke?

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Wonderful benefits! And free! We should all laugh more. I went to a laughter meditation many years ago. Just imagine a room filled with folks laying on mats laughing.
You just couldn't help laughing. What a release!

Can't say I've heard the one about the pharmacist.

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@adr
A lady walked into a pharmacy and told the pharmacist that she needed some cyanide. The pharmacist said, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?"

The lady then explained she needed it to poison her husband. The pharmacist's eyes got big and he said, 'I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband! The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife. The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, 'You didn't tell me you had a prescription.'

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When they got back, Elaine immediately 'phoned her mother and
her mother obviously asked, 'How was the honeymoon, dearest?'Ironing Board

'Oh, Ma,'
she replied, 'the honeymoon was wonderful. So romantic...'

Then Elaine
burst out crying. 'But, Ma, as soon as we returned home Rupert started using
the most ghastly language... saying things I've never heard before! I mean,
all these awful 4-letter words! You've got to come get me and take me
home.... Please Ma.'

'Calm down, Elaine!,' said her mother, 'Tell me,
what could be so awful? What 4-letter words?'

Still sobbing, Elaine
whispered, 'Oh, Ma...words like dust, wash, cook, and iron.'

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I didn't see you in church last Sunday, Perkins. I hear you were out
playing football instead.

'That's not true, Vicar. And I've got the fish to prove it.'

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@jakedduck1

@adr
A lady walked into a pharmacy and told the pharmacist that she needed some cyanide. The pharmacist said, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?"

The lady then explained she needed it to poison her husband. The pharmacist's eyes got big and he said, 'I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband! The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife. The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, 'You didn't tell me you had a prescription.'

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This is a blast!! Funny, funny, funny. Will be sharing it!! Thanks! Another good one!

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In reply to @Erinmfs "Itch remedy!" + (show)
@Erinmfs

Itch remedy!

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Great! Love the far side. Wish it was still going.
My favorite is one from the 1980’s. Shows a newspaper headline “Storm Rips Cemetary-Hundreds Found Dead” Sounds sad until you think for a second.

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