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Feeling lonely and want to vent
I don’t know about a lot of you, but I was raised that when your friends or family are sick or going through issues you’re supposed to be there for them. That hasn’t been the case for me at all. I keep choosing to believe that this is God‘s way of helping me eliminate the people out of my life that don’t truly care about me. I need to cut them off like sucker branches off a tree! What really hurts is some of these people ask me if I need anything and when I say yes, they never respond back. Why ask me if I need anything if you don’t want to help or don’t plan on helping? That has really been messing with my emotions. I’m the type of friend/neighbor that is there for you and your family. I’ll bring you food and home items. I’ll clean for you, take you to your appointments, whatever you need so you don’t have to ask for help. So you don’t feel like a burden and have to ask. But that’s me and I’m learning the majority of people around me are not the same.
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That hurts my heart to read. But I completely know that same pain. Not at the moment so much but more so when my home flooded and we were just in shock. Only my next door neighbor and I flooded. Everyone else around us were fine.
Only one neighbor brought us a meal. She was a sweet retired neighbor. I saw how much that helped because we didn’t have money to eat out. FEMA wasn’t there yet. That takes time. We’re in shock. Meals and any kind of help are so appreciated and important. I posted on Facebook if anyone wanted to help, this is what everyone needs. A few groups showed up and offered us needed help. It was beautiful.
Reaching out to the right people is key. Be patient. Maybe think of some different support groups in your area. They might be a helpful tool. Even if it is just for chat. You gotta meet the right people though.
I’ll be praying for comfort and peace.
God Bless you.
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6 ReactionsHi Ellie 80 I'm also a people pleaser,and great listener,😊
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1 ReactionHi MKT24,
Wow! You have been through all kinds of problems with finding transportation! No wonder my suggestions weren't that helpful. It sounds like you've tried all that you can. That's too bad that you can't find a solution. I assume you've looked into buses, trains etc. But often they aren't convenient or safe. At least they aren't here in Washington State! They allow people to openly use Fentanyl on the buses and also if riders, (usually homeless) go to the bathroom in the aisles they don't do anything to them. Just let them stay on the bus!
Actual background checks do cost money. But I do my own starting with Google and then taking that information and searching more into the results. It works quite well.
I will say a prayer for you. I hope things get better for you.
PML
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2 ReactionsWOW! I was just thinking that very exact thought!
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3 ReactionsThanks. On my way to get injection this am.
Ha, not far enough for buses trains etc. tiny town of 35000.
Omg!! I'm the same kind of friend you are! Honey we are truly a rare breed. And sometimes people don't know how to deal with real life shit ! Just take them for themselves and what they are. Don't rely on those people fully. Look for the true people in your circle and focus on that and forget the rest! And focus on you !
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5 ReactionsWe’ve had some of the same experiences. It’s very disappointing with people that you think are real friends. You’re not alone in this experience at all.! 🙏🏻💜
R
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5 ReactionsThere is a saying that the way to know who your friends are will be the people who walk in when everyone else walks out.
I am 80 years old and don’t understand my daughter. I flew 3 hours to take care of new born grandchildren, flew 3 hours to take care of grandchildren for 2 1/2 weeks for daughter and husband to go on Europe trip, drove eight hours to dog sit. My daughter wanted me to move close to her so my husband and I moved here after retiring. Then I picked up children from school, dog sit multiple times, and helped with children many times. The children are grown and the dog has died. Now my daughter will go 4 or 5 weeks and not even call me. She may go months and not come to see me. I am alone now and a once a week phone call or a fifteen minute visit would mean so much. When I am around her, I walk on eggshells for fear of saying or doing something that will make her angry. My daughter didn’t used to be like this and I pray for her every day.
I am very fortunate to have several very good friends that I spend time with and I thank God for all of them every day.
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7 Reactions@pinkhydrangea
I am glad you have your friends. I think many of us have experienced what you are dealing with. My mom, sister and myself went through same thing. Would drop everything to babysit, drive kids to events, whatever was needed, we were there. Then kids no longer needed a babysitter and had their driver license and forget about you.
Eventually had to accept that I was not going to change their behavior.
I volunteer and people are so grateful for my help. So I spend my time and effort with people who appreciate it.
You are lucky to have good friends to spend time with.
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11 ReactionsGosh, that is really so disappointing and sad. I’m really sorry your daughter is doing that. I am not a parent - but the aunt and grandaunt of many. If I didn’t reach out, through texting, my guess is I’d never hear from them. I do try and be the change i want to see - so once in awhile I send out a hello text, or send them a joke or just say “hi I’m thinking of you,” but it doesn’t alleviate the hurt at feeling forgotten about or not counting. I know it’s not personal - it still makes me sad. It’s so wonderful you have very good friends!
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7 Reactions