Emotional aftermath following breast cancer treatment

Posted by rhongirl @rhongirl, Aug 23, 2022

While I was diagnosed in Dec. 2019, chemo, cancer surgery, and four more surgeries took place over the next 2 1/2 years (one of which was a second cancer surgery). I'm 6 weeks out from my last surgery, feeling somewhat normal physically, but wading through the emotional aftermath. "What just happened to me?" I told my husband that I've spent the past 2 1/2 years trying to stay alive - and I'm exhausted. Exaggerated emotions with up-and-down mood swings. . . I find myself yearning for that sense of emotional equilibrium I had before this all began. I'm doing my best to give myself time for this part of the healing - but I find myself weary. Family and friends look at me like I'm fine now, and the trauma has passed - but the truth is, I am not fine on the inside. It's as if my body is trying to reboot emotionally, and its short-circuiting a bit. I am so goal-oriented. . . if I just had that "magic" date of when everything would be normal again, I could focus on that; but it doesn't work that way. I have to be patient with this portion of the healing - and I'm finding that hard. What are others' experiences with this? How long does it take for your emotions to settle from the trauma of breast cancer?

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@lznielsen

I completely agree with the cancer PTSD. I had IDC in 2021. I was told it was caught very early and that my chance of recurrence was very, very low. I was told to be thankful, and I tried. Fast forward to 2024 and I was diagnosed with bone mets. Stage IV cancer is rough, its lonely and treatment has become a full time job. Although I grieve the life I no longer have, I am thankful for every additional day I am given.

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@lznielsen, fellow members have written about PTSD and cancer in these related discussions too:

- PTSD and learning to cope living with cancer https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/ptsd-learning-to-cope/
- Facing Cancer Recurrence, PTSD & Acknowledging Mental Health https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/facing-cancer-recurrence-ptsd-acknowledging-mental-health/
- Likely metastatic lobular cancer: How do you deal with fear, PTSD? https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/most-likely-mbc-ilc/

I believe grief and gratitude can co-exist. I'm glad you're here to share your experience.

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My emotions have been all over also. I had so many shocks, or surprises as I went through the phases of diagnosis and finding it aggressive enough for chemo. Didn't start out that way. The AI drugs, I think, have an emotional effect on me too. I have very recently confided with a trusted friend and have talked with a psychologist. I plan to continue with that for a while. I felt better after the counselor visit. You aren't alone. Don't hesitate to reach out for some help.

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