Connect
Early Signs …. Money management
I know that unexplained generosity is a sign of early dementia e.g. making more frequent or larger donations to charities and appeals, overpaying for odd jobs, etc.
I just realized that my husband has done the OPPOSITE and tends to give LESS.
I think his " money mind " has reverted to his working days, 30 years ago. He is sometimes shocked at or else indifferent to today’s costs. He called our church office to stop pre- authorized donations and began putting a nominal amount of cash in an envelope on Sundays. I was able to get him to agree that I would make a monthly e-transfer so that " he doesn’t have to worry about it. " Similarly I make larger monetary gifts to kids and grandkids than he would choose to , even though he is a generous person.
He still spends time going over bills and statements , but is satisfied when I assure him that the bill is paid or that we have enough money to pay for dinner out or a planned vacation.
Our bank and our financial advisor are aware of his cognitive decline.
I’m wondering if others have experienced similar changes.
Like
Helpful
HugInterested in more discussions like this? Go to the Caregivers: Dementia Support Group.
Connect
@4goakley
I see you are from Canada so not sure how long term care costs are handled there. Do you think he is concern that if he needs to go into memory care or assisted living that the money would run out?
Has he been diagnosed with Dementia?
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
1 ReactionYes. He has a diagnosis of "Early Mixed Dementia, predominantly Alzheimer's "
I think he just forgets the value of money in today's terms.
I am fortunate that he lets me make the financial decisions, and doesn’t argue or get upset about it.
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
2 ReactionsMy husband has always been very thrifty. He didn't own a home until he was in his fifties and didn't own a car until he was in his forties. (He had a good job and a nice salary.) The good part is, he saved lots of money over the years so that we're in pretty good shape--fingers crossed. (He didn't marry until age 55.) Now he's obsessed with what everything costs--everything! He's live on cereal if he could in order to save money. He goes over every grocery receipt and finds everything too expensive. He won't buy new clothes, our cars are over 20 years old, and he really has no sense of what things really cost these days. I find all this obsessive, even though I'm thrifty myself, but it's lots better than throwing money away, which is what a friend's husband did with secret bank accounts and other dodges.
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
4 ReactionsThanks @4goakley
I enjoy of what you are doing. You said you & him does one thing or not.
I can’t to do this cause I had a bicycle accident in 2012. That means I’m up to 20% of my brain. The other 80% is gone, BUT thankfully, my wife can’t talk between me and going things like this.
I can’t do this cause I have no idea how the names, places, calling… my PC use is gone… but before this is was a pro city-government of programming._
Thx,
Greg D. @greg1956
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
1 ReactionMaybe open a new account in your name only and take 1/2 of the joint account money and put it there. Then make the joint account e only. We had a family horror story. Since he is happy to have you take over, might be time to see an elder attorney.
-
Like -
Helpful -
Hug
4 Reactions