Early possible dementia

Posted by tiffanyhope12 @tiffanyhope12, 2 days ago

Hello,

I’m trying to figure out if my mom has early signs of dementia or simply age related issues. She is 79, seems to be very sharp for her age, still works two days a week part time, but while she was driving home, she texted me.

I was on the phone at the time, but once I called her, I saw she texted she was on the way home and immediately after she said “I may be driving into it”

When i called her, she asked if it was storming out and I said no. She said that I had texted her and told her it was storming. I checked my phone, I checked her phone when she got home and there was no such text. I asked her about it and she shrugged it off. Bothering me still, I asked her about it, she didn’t want to talk about it and said “it’s a mystery”.

A few years ago I was worried about her memory, her not remembering movies we watched. I chalked it up to old age. Recently, we were going to sell our house we own together and downsize, but she became frustrated with understanding numbers. She also told me about some mailings we had in the mail for life insurance she wanted to look into. It was junk mail and she was sure it wasn’t. She has also hidden some financial decisions from me (we co-own together) and is also very paranoid about our neighbors, who she has called the HOA on and has had me put security cameras up on to our house.

This all sounds like a lot, but she still works and acts normal, has normal conversations, and my brothers don’t see anything wrong.

She eats dinner two hours earlier and goes to sleep earlier. She gets upset easily if it isn’t something she likes to hear and puts her hands over her ears.

Again, she acts normal otherwise. I take care of her and no one else sees this.

Should I be concerned of early dementia or simply age related issues?

Thank you!

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Caregivers: Dementia Support Group.

Here is an online test family members can perform on their own. It will not give her a formal diagnosis, just a hint that it’s time to see the doctor for an evaluation. It’s from psychology today.

In the elderly or those with a very mild cognitive impairment , common problems like a UTI can cause worsening memory and behavior issues. So another reason to seek professional assistance.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/tests/health/dementia-test

REPLY

tiffanyhope12,
it's good that you are noticing. Many times we miss early signs recognizing them in retrospect. The incidents you mention about your mom don't seem like a lot.
Paranoia would be a sign, but she may have reason to be concerned about her neighbors, seen an old text and though it was recent. I often receive legitimate life insurance offers through union associations that are essentially junk mail. I'd suggest that most movies are forgettable. Some are so bad that we can continue worrying about other real world concerns without even following the plot.
If you examine your own life carefully, even when you were much younger, you'll find signs of dementia. I contend that we all have MCI, on occasion, throughout our lives. When we're young these incidents are called mistakes
Seriously though, as her caregiver, you might make sure that she is getting appropriate medical care with regular CBC and Metabolic panels. Separate testing for B12, D3. And that her dietary intake is sufficient with protein. Vision and hearing exams sometimes explain behaviors.
You could contact her doctor privately and ask for some cognitive testing, but if she thinks you are examining her that way and talking to her sons about it, she'll want to hide things from you instead of confiding in you.
Bless your caring.

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I think these are clues that there may be a cognitive issue. A check up is warranted, including screening for an infection and/or a metabolic disturbance (lab tests) and, at least a cognitive screening test. Early dementia is easy to miss or dismiss. It could be something easily treatable or maybe she is just quirky. But I would get it checked out. If possible, go with her to the doctor to fill in the gaps, or if she won't allow it, speak with the doctor or his assistant to give a heads-up with your concerns, because she may not (probably won't) mention them herself.

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Thank you all for the help and great advice. I’ll find out when her next doctor appointment is in a roundabout way.

I realize some of the signs I mentioned aren’t too bad, but I’ve just noticed a change in her and her moods. She did have a really horrible ear infection not too long ago and had it for months, ending up in the ER. The prescribed her the wrong ear medication!

Thanks again all and I’ll keep you posted. 🙂

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Hi, and sorry you are going through this and wondering what to do next.
Folks often can put on a good front for the doctor, and issues may not show up on standard tests like MOCA. Also, if she's in denial she may refuse going to the doctor at all for assessment.
Perhaps if you start tracking the behavior that seems off her normal, and include dates, you'll see some patterns unfolding and will have more info when the Doc visit finally happens. Good luck. 🫂

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If you want to be her agent, I’d make sure she has signed Healthcare and Durable Powers of Attorney while she is able.

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That’s a good idea! I am her power of attorney/executor, which is in her Will. I’ll have to pull out the papers and look to see what all she put in there.

Thank you!

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That’s a good idea! I am her power of attorney/executor, which is in her Will. I’ll have to pull out the papers and look to see what all she put in there.

Thank you!

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Her POA will be a separate document from her Will. I’d try to find the original.

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