Doing research while being anxious

IMO, if your anxiety and depression become debilitating, please seek professional help. If not, then I can assure you that you're pretty normal. We all went through it at some level. Very similar to the grieving process, you have to just muddle through until you get to the acceptance part. If you click on my name, you can see my profile. Scared the hell out of me when I was first diagnosed and got worse over the next month or so. I found that studying, I mean truly studying, the disease to be very helpful. Now it's just part of life. Hang in there. You got this.

A couple things to pass the time...
https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/prostate-cancer-related-abbreviations-what-acronym-would-you-add/
https://www.youtube.com/@ThePCRI/videos

@mjp0512 Thanks for your input. I guess I haven't reached full acceptance yet. Not sure. I feel like I am in a bad dream and will wake up soon. Thanks for acronyms and I did read your profile posts / history, and learned some new things I didn't know about. So many things to know. And I don't know yet what I don't know - if that makes sense. So, I continue to study and hope for some level of acceptance and reduced anxiety soon. I have cardiac issues also, so I may or may not have the option for surgery path. Thank You, Dan

We’re all different, I never have had much anxiety over it, but it may be because my eventual diagnosis was a long, drawn out process, taking a little over four years, and I think at about the halfway mark, I just accepted I was going to be positive at some point, it was just a matter of time.

I’m not a details person, my brain just doesn’t work that way. I did very little research beyond common treatments once I was diagnosed, and I made my treatment decision in a split second (it was easy math for me - short treatment with fewer side effects versus long treatment with more side effects), and I just put my head down and got on with it.

Honestly, for me, the more research I’d ever do for something like this, the more anxiety it would cause me, because it would start to feel overwhelming.

When you feel it getting to be too much, just step back and take a break. Take some comfort in the idea that PCa is much more treatable now than it was in the past, even if the treatment can sometimes be pretty onerous. It doesn’t have to be, though. Mine hasn’t been too terrible (though I’d rather not have it at all, of course).

Balance, don’t overwhelm yourself, go at a good pace, and if you feel your care team is competent, trust them a little. You don’t have to know everything about PCa right now this minute.

Maybe set aside a certain time during the day every day and say, “This is my PCa research time, 11AM-1PM,” and once 1PM rolls around, close all the books and web pages on your cancer, and go do all the other things you do in the course of a day.

It’s not always easy, but I work really hard about making my existence about a lot more than just “the cancer guy.” I make sure it doesn’t consume me, I make sure that every conversation I have with family and friends isn’t about cancer/treatment/progress.

Keep a good attitude, stay positive (something that comes natural to me), and understand it’s not all doom and gloom going forward. It’s a big sandwich, so one bite at a time!

As I'm certain you have read in others' posts - exercise is "the secret sauce." Not only will it help your body counter all of the probable side effects from ADT meds, it also causes the release of endorphins that make you feel better and fight anxiety/depression. I don't envy your journey ... it seems to be different for each of us ... but in hindsight, it wasn't seem nearly as bad a trip as I expected. Keep reading on this forum ... there's a wealth of knowledge here!

I was diagnosed at 62 with a 3+4. I had surgery and they told me it was a 4+3. 3 1/2 years later, it came back and I had radiation 2 1/2 years later it came back and I went on ADT. I now have been on it for eight years. It Has come back two more times, but I’ve been undetectable for the last 31 months After 16 years. I have BRCA2, a genetic problem, which makes it much more aggressive.

What you have is not really a major problem. Many people have much more aggressive cases than you do and live decades. Prostate cancer is a chronic disease for almost all of us not a deadly disease.

When you have tumors outside the prostate, they usually want to do radiation instead of surgery. In your case, they could do surgery and then zap the lymph node that has the problem.

People’s reaction to ADT varies considerably. I’ve been on it for eight years and I’ve never had fatigue But it is definitely bad for the muscles and bones so I take calcium and vitamin D daily and walk on the track a mile twice a day and go to gym three days a week. I’ve been on Bone strengtheners for seven years, It has kept my chance of broken bones to a very low level. Because your cancer has spread outside the prostate, they frequently want to use ADT to try to eliminate The possibility of it coming back.

Don’t get too anxious about this what you have is very treatable. I know people with Gleason nine and multiple metastasis who are still here 10 15 and 20 years later.

Hi Dptrainer
All good advice above. Like you I too was stressed out to the max trying to make a decision on treatment. Too much information and disinformation to muddle through. Geez! just trying to remember all the acronyms was enough to give me angina, not to mention getting different opinions from the professionals. I was in stress mode for about 6 months before I decided on focal therapy. Once I committed to a treatment my stress level dropped dramatically. I guess that was my acceptance point. The focal therapy was successful at eradicating the cancer from the prostate gland, but unknown until several months later it had micro metastasized to my pelvic lymph nodes. Not much of a choice after that. 40 rounds of IMRT and two years of ADT with ARPI. Currently enjoying non detectable PSA. At this juncture instead of stress mode, I'm just worrying somewhat about what comes next after ADT is finished. Anyhow, you're not alone. My initial treatment choice may not have been the correct one, but it was what I felt most comfortable with at the time. It is a journey. Learn as much as you can and make a choice that you feel most comfortable with. Keep in mind there are plenty of tools to combat prostate cancer. I have been dealing with a center of excellence cancer center which I would highly recommend getting opinions from. I also recommend PCRI Dr. Mark Scholz videos were very helpful to me.

One of the things you’ll find as you dig into this is understanding that it’s your numbers (PSA, PIRADS, Gleason, SUVmax, etc.) that should drive your fears. Without following all those, you might be worrying about nothing.

What are your other numbers?:
> PSA
> PIRADS
> SUVmax
> etc.

> What was your biomarker (genomic) test result?

> What was your genetic (germline) test result?

Note that a Gleason score of 3+4=7 is called intermediate favorable (not unfavorable). You that your prostate capsule has spread into surrounding fatty tissue and also to pelvic lymph nodes.

I dived head-first into researching prostate cancer; that’s the way I deal with challenges; that’s the only way to get the optimal results.

(At 65y, with a PSA of 6.976 and Gleason of (4+3)=7, I had 28 sessions of proton radiation + 6 months of ADT.)

Every single word you wrote mirrored my same mindset when I got ‘the news’. Obsession doesn’t even describe it!
Everything you are feeling is to be expected, normal and natural!
You don’t need drugs, you don’t need a shrink - you don’t need anything but a mental attitude: You have a problem and you need professional, expert help to solve it - you cannot do this by yourself by watching a Youtube video.
Learn what you can in the next few weeks, but DON’t try to become an expert; you will never know what your doctors know, but enough to ask pertinent questions.
The choice between surgery or radiation is always a very difficult one and many, many of us agonized over it.
In a sense, and this is only my opinion based on my experience and what I’ve read on this forum, your decision is a bit easier..,
Your cancer has already escaped the gland and it is in the nodes; simple removal (as if) is no longer a curative measure.
You will have to go after that cancer in the nodes and wherever else it might be: that usually involves radiation of some kind, probably with the addition of ADT. Your doctors will ((should!)) know what is best for your particular case.
Some men do both - surgery to get the bulk of the cancer out - followed by radiation to get the rest. That’s your choice but it’s really not necessary since today’s radiation therapy is incredibly powerful and precise and can take care of it all.
One caveat: Get the VERY BEST doctors for your treatment! Your condition is not a simple one for your local urologist or radiation center. Go with a big teaching hospital or center of excellence (COE); this is not the time to worry about distance, travel time or inconvenience. This is a pivotal moment which will impact the REST of your life!
Get the BEST treatment available and then put yourself in your cancer team’s hands. You will survive this in much better shape than you think!
Best of Luck,
Phil

Thank you everyone for very good responses and information that helps me. I will reply individually to all of you very soon. (I am not feeling well today). But, I can say this now: that your comments have already helped me and I appreciate it greatly! Dan

@dptrainor

I am so sorry that you have to deal with PC and initial diagnosis is shocking and demoralizing for everybody *hugs. You just got the news and it would be actually strange to feel calm and confident : ((( - I know that it does not make you feel any better but I just want to reiterate what everybody else already said here, whatever you are feeling is understandable and expected. : ((

At the same time, if your feelings are overwhelming and paralyzing and preventing you from functioning and from having strength an stamina to fight this beast, by all means it is OK to seek help and get some mild sedative or anti- depressant to help you go through this initial stage.

Yes, so much to learn in such short period of time : (((. BUT, just by knowing that you have to do it is giving you amazing advantage over poor people who do not know where to turn or what to read or where to go. The second positive factor is that you are diagnosed "today" and not just 10 or even 5 years ago - research in this area advanced sooooo much that nowadays PC treatments are numerous and most of the time provide great success !

As Jeff and Phil said, your choice might be easier since one node is positive and RT (radiation) might be a better treatment in your case. I am not a doctor, of course, and you will make your choice in cooperation with your doctor, but that is what I would choose for my husband if his initial diagnoses was like yours. Unfortunately, they wrongly assumed that his PC was contained.

Wishing you the best of luck in achieving complete eradication of PC in very near future - all is possible !!! Every single case is different and results different but mostly successful 👍🍀
Sending you healing vibes and hugssss ...