Does anyone have tips for communicating with someone with dementia?

Yes, communication with a person who has dementia can be challenging. When I first started caring for my cousin, who had dementia, I struggled, because I just thought it was memory that was affected. But, it’s much more including thought processing, communication, emotional processing, coordination, etc. Perhaps, your husband still retains some ability to read and recall. Currently, my dad, who has dementia, is not able to follow any written direction.

I recall writing simple instructions on post it notes for simple things for my cousin, but even though she could read the note, she was not able to follow the direction. There was a disconnect. For example, there would be a bowl with crackers inside that had a note on top that said FOR YOUR SNACK. But, she wasn’t able to read it, open the bowl and get her crackers. If I asked her to read it aloud, she could, but not follow the instructions. When she entered Assisted Living there was a huge sign right at eye level in front of the toilet that said Press Button For Help. She would sit there an hour without ringing for help. She could read the sign, but not follow the direction.

This is why when I hear about reminders for people with dementia, I wonder how helpful they are, because often reminders don’t help. The person may need direct instruction from a person who is in their presence.

Yes, and it is difficult.
Try not to expect. It's very nice to continue to ask, just don't be disappointed if you haven't been able to communicate. Be careful not to be corrective. You might take the belt and thank him, and wait to fetch the charger so that he isn't embarrassed about having don the wrong thing (again). It isn't that he isn't listening or that he doesn't hear.
He is trying; his brain is not cooperating.
You may find the milk in the clothes closet, socks on his hands, keys in the trash bin, ice cream in the microwave. Fill this world in which nothing is as it seems with kindness.
Communicate how much you care for him. Play his all time favorite music. Write those notes that he can fold and unfold.
This doesn't get easier.
Bless you both.

Isn’t in interesting that we all have the same problems only in duifferent ways. I have a lady who helps me. She was driving and my wife wanted her to take care of car her gave her. Grand passed away 30 years ago. Yesterday my wife wanted to know if I got her cloths from next door and did I have a spare bedroom. Don’t know the people next door. We are all in same boat only different.

Since I posted about this, I read an article that suggested writing notes or at least trying it to see if it works. I will try it one day just to see.

What was the cause of your cousin's dementia? I'm making a guess here, but I think that there are likely differences depending on the cause, as well as commonalities regardless of the cause. My husband's is due to his having had seven TIAs and one bigger stroke (according to the MRI because all we were aware of was one TIA). I would guess that two people with dementia due to strokes could have some differences in their symptoms depending on which area of the brain was affected.

I did buy one of those calendar/clock combos that tell the day of the week, date, time, and whether it's morning, afternoon, evening, or night. He was always straining to read his last-century watch that he got when he retired and he never knew what month, day, or year it was. Now he can read it and often does out loud. I don't know if he remembers that information when he leaves the room, but at least he can see it when he wants to. He really likes it. So do I, for that matter, just because it's a very useful item, period.

My husband, too, lost the ability to understand the signs I taped up- “Turn off faucets”, “Shut fridge door”. So I went to a plumbing supply, they helped me with a faucet that turns itself off after 2 minutes. I’d glance at the fridge door every time I went by. I researched door alarms so I’d know if he left the house.
It’s ongoing and you just have to do your best to solve the problems that crop up. You also have to “let go” what really doesn’t matter. My hubby decided he wanted to sleep with his shoes and socks on. His PCP and diabetes MD said that was okay, took me awhile to get used to the idea, but really, so what….., that’s what he wanted to do.

It sounds like you love him very much. My spouse has Parkinsons and everyday is a challenge. Hugs and prayers

Yes, I’d try various ways to see which ones might work. Everyone is different in their capacity. My cousin was initially diagnosed with Vascular Dementia (diagnosed by PC and Neurologist) at age 63. She lived with it severely affected for 6 years. About 4 years after diagnosis, her psychiatrist thought she might also have Alzheimer’s, but I’m not sure why.

My dad has Alz and his illness has been very slow with some abilities that fluctuate. My cousin never seemed to have moments of clarity after a certain point. They both have had peculiar fixations.

What you describe is (1) inability to recall exactly what you asked of him, and (2) loss of "executive" funtion, which limits or prevents him from following "complex" (multi-step) tasks. My wife has difficulty performing a 3 step process on the TV remote control. She cannot follow a recipe. She cannot rmember how to make a grilled cheese sandwich. All these things involve following steps. I've written down the TV remote instructions and she sometimes cannot follow these. Writing notes or instruction may or may not help but it won't hurt to try. Executive function involves the ability to perform planning and organizational skills and is a prominent aspect of dementia.

Similar with my mom, she entered Memory Care last week. We moved the help cord closer to her bed, but it hasn't registered yet for her to pull it when she needs help in the middle of the night or when she gets up in the morning. I'm concerned about her trying to stand up on her own. They lower the hospital bed while she is sleeping and place a fall pad on the floor. Rails are illegal here in Arizona. It is a 'Right to Fall' state. I think she gets up at around 6:30 or 7:00 and sits there for possibly up to an hour waiting for someone.
It's heartbreaking to think of her sitting there feeling helpless, lonely and abandoned.
The caregivers added a assign next to the pull cord with the message "Pull cord for help. Do not get up by yourself."
We will keep trying to reinforce the messaging and encourage her to use the pull cord and raise your hand and ask for help throughout the day. I'm not sure that it is registering very well.

I did some research and talked with professional caregivers into how best to communicate in my particular situation. It seems everyone has similar but also different techniques. What I found was a bit of experimenting and then using the best techniques to get the best results. This has worked well. For example, if they say something unintelligible and has nothing to do with anything serious I, and the caregivers, say "Oh, ok." Just go along with it. You don't want to say "Sorry, What did you say." because that leads to frustration.