1. < Depression & Anxiety

Does anyone feel old and useless with age?

Posted by sally12345 @sally12345, Sep 13, 2023

Hi, I'm almost 64.. I'm feeling old and useless. My strength isn't good anymore. Like it used to be mainly side effects of meds. My health is poor with cvsd. Osteoporosis, poor circulation, hearing , eyesight, you name it's going. I always took care of myself. Now I've gotten older and everything's wrong, my grandkids don't a want me around and they are little still. No friends to talk with or do things with. Why is it we spend our lifetime taking care of family. Loving friends to end up , old and tired. Useless.

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Depression & Anxiety Support Group.

gravity3 | @gravity3 | 3 days ago
In reply to @yeja "thank you for your response. I actually have been suffering with depression for over 25 years...." + (show)
@yeja

thank you for your response. I actually have been suffering with depression for over 25 years. I am on medication for over 25 years. My psychiatrist says I have a cyclical clinical depression. I can go months with feeling great and not even being able to pull up these ideas that are in my head now where I enjoy my job I enjoy my family. I enjoy my volunteering. I can be fine for months at a time and then for whatever reason ;built-up stress or at the end of a vacation or something and I just fall into this hole I describe it as a hole with a black cloud and no color ,my heart palpitates. I don’t want to get out of bed. I can’t eat. I feel like I have nothing to live for and when I get in these conditions, thats when I start to reach out for help, I do not have a therapist. I’m trying very hard to find one here in South Florida that I can meet with in person. Someone that is about my age who has gone through things that I have gone through raising a family elderly parents, etc. I’m looking for someone like that like a friend but someone who’s a therapist. I have not had luck finding that so far . I did learn a lot of tools to use to get me out of this hole. The first one of course, you must get out of bed and brush your teeth. The next one is maybe get out in the fresh air. Do an activity , connect with a person but right now my days are filled with visiting my mom because I’m afraid I could lose her any day and my five beautiful grandchildren who I helped raise , they all now go to school and have afterschool activities so that whole stage of my life has changed. I am married. My husband still works, but we do not have a very busy social life, which is very difficult. I just look at the world and feel like what’s left for me.?

Jump to this post

I am struck with how much caregiving of others you have done and are still doing.
When I read your last line...'I just look at the world and feel like what's left for me'.
The word that immediately popped into my head is YOU!
Who will you be now. What would you love to explore or learn. What is your fantasy of the life you would like to lead. Where would you like to go. Do you keep a journal? Writing in it daily could give you some answers and insights. Keep it loose and free form ...no rules. Let the pen guide you. If you remember your dreams, keep your journal and pen close...write them down. Most importantly.. don't judge your journaling or dreams. The world is rich with possibility and you seem to be a woman with a wealth of experience and learning.

REPLY
darleneporter | @darleneporter | 3 days ago

I can understand, I took have no friends either , my 2 best friends have moved to other states, it's difficult to make new ones, as I find that most of the people I met have established relations, and don't want intruders, I am 78 yrs old , in a mixed marriage and find older women shun me when they find out, even though my husband is kind and a loving person, all my grandchildren are married and don't live close, my daughters are busy with there own lives, I do exercise and take care of myself, this website helps me a lot, I find it therapeutic, I'm so glad to be here, prayer helps me a lot, may God Bless you

REPLY
standinginfaith | @standinginfaith | 2 days ago
In reply to @sally12345 "Faith is above all else in the world. It's as I have always said, no one..." + (show)
@sally12345

Faith is above all else in the world. It's as I have always said, no one can take it away and in the end it's all we have.

Jump to this post

AMEN!!!

REPLY
SusanEllen66 | @SusanEllen66 | 2 days ago

Old is a blessing!
We are wise now, and can offer young people sage advice, if they ask. I’m not going to pretend my life is great. However, I sometimes wear a “mask” to hide my mental decline as a result of dementia from others. It’s exhausting to pretend you are ok when you are not.
Other neurological situations that are causing me physical pain, and distress is the bane of my existence.

However, I really can smile (without the mask) most times. People who meet me and learn my story are amazed that I am smiling, laughing and happy.
When I tell them I have Jesus Christ walking next to me they usually smile.

That is who this 75 year old desert dweller is now.

REPLY
standinginfaith | @standinginfaith | 2 days ago

I wrestle with anxiety.. ptsd.. I'm 71 and twice widowed..no children and lots of digestive issues.. fear tries to creep in every time I get hungry .. all day long.. nightmares at night..I know "trapped in your head".. so (I have a cousin same way).. so here's the bottom like .. you were wonderfully made by the Almighty God and He thinks you are special.. you are special.. tell yourself that ..over and over if you have to..fight fear with faith.. there is Victory in Christ Jesus..(I don't know how you believe.. but I am quite satisfied being a child of God thru Christ Jesus ..I'm so unhappy with the way I look and feel now.. but I take my place in the family of God.. you belong there too..hold your head up high!! Praying for you to be an overcomer!! Believe!!

REPLY
1 reply
gravity3 | @gravity3 | 2 days ago
In reply to @johneckenrode11 "Lifestyle, diet & exercise are the answers, not big pharma! Good luck to you." + (show)
@johneckenrode11

Lifestyle, diet & exercise are the answers, not big pharma! Good luck to you.

Jump to this post

Yes, important but some can receive help from pharmaceutical intervention!

REPLY
1 reply
jaris | @jaris | 2 days ago
In reply to @standinginfaith "I wrestle with anxiety.. ptsd.. I'm 71 and twice widowed..no children and lots of digestive issues....." + (show)
@standinginfaith

I wrestle with anxiety.. ptsd.. I'm 71 and twice widowed..no children and lots of digestive issues.. fear tries to creep in every time I get hungry .. all day long.. nightmares at night..I know "trapped in your head".. so (I have a cousin same way).. so here's the bottom like .. you were wonderfully made by the Almighty God and He thinks you are special.. you are special.. tell yourself that ..over and over if you have to..fight fear with faith.. there is Victory in Christ Jesus..(I don't know how you believe.. but I am quite satisfied being a child of God thru Christ Jesus ..I'm so unhappy with the way I look and feel now.. but I take my place in the family of God.. you belong there too..hold your head up high!! Praying for you to be an overcomer!! Believe!!

Jump to this post

@standinginfaith Thank you for your kind words

REPLY
1 reply
standinginfaith | @standinginfaith | 1 day ago
In reply to @jaris "@standinginfaith Thank you for your kind words" + (show)
@jaris

@standinginfaith Thank you for your kind words

Jump to this post

You're' so welcome!! Continued prayers for you!!

REPLY
dbamos1945 | @dbamos1945 | 1 day ago

@jaris: I am hoping you are ready for some Straight Talk?!?Your situation is not unique. There is a way out of this “trapped” repetition you perceive as social failure. If you truly want more in your life… Consider facing the fact that the people you want in your life desire friends/mates who are happy with their life as it is, have love of self and others, accept the good/bad in life, are productive and have goals for daily life, are grateful for their many talents, enjoy creative projects, etc, etc!
Jaris, if you work on yourself through therapy, positivity books/lectures, not allowing strong anxiety to rule your decisions - every anxious symptom grows worse the more we give-in to it.
I suggest change your thoughts and actions to “being GRATEFUL and Kind to others”, smile more (even in the mirror), laugh out loud, and really take every opportunity to FEEL happy inside.
Decide today is the day I will start living the life I drastically want! There are many ways to ask for help everyday when you know you need it to make these changes. You can do this!

REPLY
View MoreView Less
Please sign in or register to post a reply.