How do You Deal with Dangerous Doctor, Abusive Provider? Tips?

Posted by rsfcowgirl @rsfcowgirl, Mar 6, 2023

Most medical professionals are the greatest people in the world bc they choose work that helps humanity. (Or animals) But sometimes people with serious problems qualify for Medical licenses. They have a different face towards their peers who they seek acceptance from than they often have to their patients behind closed doors when they don't truly value patients as people. I had the misfortune of just concluding a year with an abuser.
This doctor was an independent PCP + based in an office without oversight, which is not unusual. I'm a single Senior woman. I was stricken w COVID twice+ then signed in with him for treatment of many debilitating unresolved symptoms. He looked good on paper in terms of credentials. He had openings and I needed a PCP.
He had an initial interest in deciphering my symptoms. Blood panels were perfect. He ordered an MRI to rule out a stroke bc of what was PASC but which he didn't acknowledge. The imaging revealed a meningioma brain tumor. However, the local neurosurgeon and 2 Top Ten specials indicated it was benign but untreatable for various reasons, but with the good news was that it was asymptomatic + not the cause of my symptoms. Repeated MRI showed no changes. It is expected to never become a problem. I am simply on tumor watch.
I moved to N Carolina after a lifetime on the other side of the country, just months before COVID arrived. Prior, I had decades long warm+ wonderful relationships with my doctors, who honestly never were wrong. They were just that good. But I didn't have any serious problems to require ongoing care for anything other than a disc injury that I recovered from without surgery. So I expected to continue on my same course after moving.
This PCP has real Dark Triad + sadistic pathologies. He began a campaign of doom for me, rejecting all above neuro reports+ hammering his view that my life was going downhill without any form of help. He rejected any other diagnosis like Post COVID. He was verbally+ emotionally abusive unlike anyone ever spoke to me. When I brought in a wrong form he called me by phone and said my mistake "WAS UNACCEPTABLE!" in a tone like 'BAD DOG!" He often sat w his back to me+ never look at me during visits, after. He's a large man+ his contempt+ arrogance were palpable. I have trauma from previous crime. I gave him a LEO phone number to call at their request + he refused, blasting me for a " conspiracy theory" + mandated that I may never mention it again. It was horrible. I posted here Nov I wanted to change Drs. Never got to. This guy began harassment by not reordering my 1 medication I take for several symptoms which also suppresses potential seizures tho he got multiple requests. He let the Rx run out over Thanksgiving then approaching Xmas. He saw me the day before Christmas Eve. I had not a full dose of meds for days. I said to him - he wasnt treating me for anything, I had no care plan + why couldn't be just refill my Rx in time. I had an deep infection beginning on my sternum + my BP standing was dropping to 70/30, at home, which he never took standing, after he walked in exam room.
He became infuriated! Cold controlled rage + contempt. He said, "We're done here, right now. You'll get a letter." Punctuated w his forefinger tapping the table. Shocked but ill, I asked to be transferred to another of the 20 Drs in the building+ he said absolutely not, that he won't allow me to be seen there. He said with dripping contemptuous sarcasm "Good luck finding another Dr. " I then told him he failed as a Dr much more. He was 100% statue like + non responsive to everything. We had a below zero rare freeze alert pending that night then Xmas long holiday. He renewed Rx but pharmacy was out of stock. I went back+ did get some but I ended up having my first seizure as soon as I could get home. Without timely care for the bacterial infection, it spread fast. In days when services reopened I needed office surgery + now I've been told I need thoracic surgery under general anesthesia to complete the tx. Dr said had I been treated timely none of this would have developed Lost my (minor PT) job bc I couldnt work. Was on antibiotics for a month w side effects. Biggest ending: He excoriated me in his final medical records, creating false impressions and distorted content. A vile smear job. Just FYI, my career was as an RN Specialist at the very top internationally recognized hospitals. I never mentioned this to him until he terminated me with callous disregard for my welfare, since I'm retired. He never asked about me. But I confronted him as a dangerous doctor. He was totally stunned. But caught. Dr E is not typical. But it does happen. It happened to me. He intended to extend his abusive reach into my future healthcare via medical records. But I'm blocking them + silencing his evil voice.
This is surely an anomaly. But it does happen to innocent patients behind closed doors of licensed medical professionals who are of the Dark Triad personality disorder w sadistic enjoyments.
I got a much needed cardiology consult on my own w problems identity, + under tx. I connected w someone for Post COVID tx + it's helping
These are all basic txs I could've had a yr ago.
Chest surgery is hopefully going to be easy. The surgeon is highly respected + known to be kind.
That's my nightmare story.
Any support would be appreciated. I'm still shaken by this. But moving forward.

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Doctors are not saints. They are no more moral than any other member of society. Doctors break the law as much as anyone else. And doctors go to jail as much as any other profession. And that is plenty.

When I was a kid in the 60s and 70s, I got excellent medical care.

The medical care I received started to decline in the 80s. By the 90s, almost all my interactions with doctors and the medical profession have been difficult or flat out horrible.

Now, I am disabled and on Medicare. I am quite convinced that the poor get treated MUCH worse than those with money.

I am sure there are many articles and books out there about the abuses by doctors. I guess I am going to have to look into all that to see what to do.

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to rsfcowgirl

Very very sorry to hear about your experiences.

I have had many horror shows with doctors. And I know many others who also have had horror shows with doctors.

They are people. They are not saints. They are no more moral than anyone else. And if you check into crime statistics, I am sure the percentage of crime committed by doctors is pretty much the same as any other member of society.

So, don't be hoodwinked by some myth that doctors are from Mount Olympus. They are not.

I don't trust reporting doctors to other doctors or to medical organizations. I think it is probably a "good old boys" network and they protect their own, rather than properly discipline offenders.

I myself am looking for ways to deal with the problems.

I have started to reference that, you know, like anyone else, I have friends and relatives in law enforcement. When I started saying that, I did notice that the abuse I receive lessened some.

But doctors and, in particular, HMOs are extremely politically powerful in society. And I would exercise caution in dealing with them.

Maybe some talented political activists and journalists already dealing with these issues could help you.

One quick story. This was with a vet, not a doctor. Cat was treated horribly, vet gave the cat the wrong medication and made her quite ill. I looked him up. He already had a criminal conviction! I complained. Some lawyer working for him called me and threatened me.

This is how evil people behave. You have to be very careful. They do so much wrong, that they are very familiar with fighting against criticisms of their abusive actions.

One time I was in the ER with severe respiratory problems (eventually diagnosed with severe apnea and severe asthma). They placed me on a gurney next to someone else with respiratory problems. Either one of us could have severely harmed or even killed the other patient. I complained to the nurse. Male nurse, former military. Guy put an unnecessary shunt in my arm, stuck it in painfully and left it in their for 18 hours...you know, as a threat and as punishment. That was definitely a criminal act.
And while I was there, a phone call came in to the nurses station. Nurse listened very quietly. Then hung up and said out loud, "I guess we are getting sued again."

This is all due to finance and politics. Government let business take over health care. Now they make the rules, not medical professionals. And when they cut costs to increase their profit ratio, medical care suffers.

From my point of view, all these HMO people belong in prison. They are literally prescribing medical solutions without a medical license. By definition, the entirety of what they do is outside the law.

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@samcal9977zz

to rsfcowgirl

Very very sorry to hear about your experiences.

I have had many horror shows with doctors. And I know many others who also have had horror shows with doctors.

They are people. They are not saints. They are no more moral than anyone else. And if you check into crime statistics, I am sure the percentage of crime committed by doctors is pretty much the same as any other member of society.

So, don't be hoodwinked by some myth that doctors are from Mount Olympus. They are not.

I don't trust reporting doctors to other doctors or to medical organizations. I think it is probably a "good old boys" network and they protect their own, rather than properly discipline offenders.

I myself am looking for ways to deal with the problems.

I have started to reference that, you know, like anyone else, I have friends and relatives in law enforcement. When I started saying that, I did notice that the abuse I receive lessened some.

But doctors and, in particular, HMOs are extremely politically powerful in society. And I would exercise caution in dealing with them.

Maybe some talented political activists and journalists already dealing with these issues could help you.

One quick story. This was with a vet, not a doctor. Cat was treated horribly, vet gave the cat the wrong medication and made her quite ill. I looked him up. He already had a criminal conviction! I complained. Some lawyer working for him called me and threatened me.

This is how evil people behave. You have to be very careful. They do so much wrong, that they are very familiar with fighting against criticisms of their abusive actions.

One time I was in the ER with severe respiratory problems (eventually diagnosed with severe apnea and severe asthma). They placed me on a gurney next to someone else with respiratory problems. Either one of us could have severely harmed or even killed the other patient. I complained to the nurse. Male nurse, former military. Guy put an unnecessary shunt in my arm, stuck it in painfully and left it in their for 18 hours...you know, as a threat and as punishment. That was definitely a criminal act.
And while I was there, a phone call came in to the nurses station. Nurse listened very quietly. Then hung up and said out loud, "I guess we are getting sued again."

This is all due to finance and politics. Government let business take over health care. Now they make the rules, not medical professionals. And when they cut costs to increase their profit ratio, medical care suffers.

From my point of view, all these HMO people belong in prison. They are literally prescribing medical solutions without a medical license. By definition, the entirety of what they do is outside the law.

Jump to this post

Hi. You raise many issues. I agree that medicine has become politicized and do exercise political clout. Yes, doctors are an elite group in many ways. But the reality is that to become a physician, you have to have a high IQ, dedication that places achievement over frivolous pastimes, a clean criminal record and make sacrifices. Not all physicians have the same knowledge/skills, character or personality. Yes mistakes are made. Some mistakes are accidental and some are with full knowledge. But OVERALL ----the medical profession is a humanitarian type of effort. The primary reason for it is to help people medically. We in the USA have enjoyed a quality of life like no other country, in great part, because of public health and individual healthcare. Agreed however, that disparity had existed.
I'm personally grieved by the loss of integrity and high standards in America across the board in our country. But there is a crisis in it healthcare system now, and it's not the fault of the medical professionals. Yes, they're human. But you have no idea of how the recent years have impacted them overall. Some of the highest trained + best licensed professionals are leaving the medical field because they can't practice to their personal standards under current circumstances. The medical system is going to decline further for a variety of reasons.
I'm an old gal. I've seen the changes in our country over recent decades. I was part of the medical profession in my career. I see much collapse in some areas---- with great improvement in other areas, including pharmacology and technology.
I feel the experience of seeking and receiving medical care is more of a battle than any other activity. And you don't know what the outcome will be until it's over as far as inter-personal dynamics and quality of care go.
My experience with this recent doctor who is a grandiose narcissist and who will punish any patient to the fullest extent of his reach has resulted in my withdraw from care, basically. I see one PCP who is in a small husband-wife practice. She's excellent. She's treating me for PASC and giving me my life back. But I decline all other services. I prefer to not have care than to suffer the stress, struggle and potential abuse that is now associated with it. The top rung of the medical field still leads the world in resolving the most complex conditions and provides the research that moves the survival of mankind forward. But they can't accommodate everyone.
As a last comment: I have seen and experienced the most abusive, substandard and outrageous nursing/tech conduct from men who came out of the military and into the private sector when nursing wages greatly increased, only because of the pay scale and open door. I hear you on that. I have observed it to my shock. Otherwise, I might not believe it. Their conduct is alien to any other behavior I've seen in my career.
I had satisfaction from my insurance company. I reported the doctor to UHC and Medicare for falsifying my medical billing to make me appear sicker on paper for increased reimbursements. He outright fabricated+ committed fraud. They withdrew payment for those claims. I also posted on health line + other Internet sites for rating doctors exactly what problems I experienced. I am going to submit a complaint to the State licensing board. I have added my corrections+ experience to my electronic medical records and I instructed this Dr that I prohibit him or his office from making his records available to any other medical entity other than insurance.
I am continuing remedies. It's not just for me. There needs to be accountability for the safety of others. This Dr has skills to help people. He just needs to have oversight and accountability to address the problems he also has.
I hope you find your way to resolution. It's a war out there, unfortunately. We're not in Kansas anymore, Toto.

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One of my greatest hopes is that the patient revolution will spread as fast as COVID did.

The Patient Revolution
https://www.patientrevolution.org/

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@johnbishop

One of my greatest hopes is that the patient revolution will spread as fast as COVID did.

The Patient Revolution
https://www.patientrevolution.org/

Jump to this post

I love you so much for being the messenger of the answer to my prayers. You've led me to my useful purpose. This is where there is hope. I'm IN! Thank you so much. 🕊️

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@rsfcowgirl

Hi. You raise many issues. I agree that medicine has become politicized and do exercise political clout. Yes, doctors are an elite group in many ways. But the reality is that to become a physician, you have to have a high IQ, dedication that places achievement over frivolous pastimes, a clean criminal record and make sacrifices. Not all physicians have the same knowledge/skills, character or personality. Yes mistakes are made. Some mistakes are accidental and some are with full knowledge. But OVERALL ----the medical profession is a humanitarian type of effort. The primary reason for it is to help people medically. We in the USA have enjoyed a quality of life like no other country, in great part, because of public health and individual healthcare. Agreed however, that disparity had existed.
I'm personally grieved by the loss of integrity and high standards in America across the board in our country. But there is a crisis in it healthcare system now, and it's not the fault of the medical professionals. Yes, they're human. But you have no idea of how the recent years have impacted them overall. Some of the highest trained + best licensed professionals are leaving the medical field because they can't practice to their personal standards under current circumstances. The medical system is going to decline further for a variety of reasons.
I'm an old gal. I've seen the changes in our country over recent decades. I was part of the medical profession in my career. I see much collapse in some areas---- with great improvement in other areas, including pharmacology and technology.
I feel the experience of seeking and receiving medical care is more of a battle than any other activity. And you don't know what the outcome will be until it's over as far as inter-personal dynamics and quality of care go.
My experience with this recent doctor who is a grandiose narcissist and who will punish any patient to the fullest extent of his reach has resulted in my withdraw from care, basically. I see one PCP who is in a small husband-wife practice. She's excellent. She's treating me for PASC and giving me my life back. But I decline all other services. I prefer to not have care than to suffer the stress, struggle and potential abuse that is now associated with it. The top rung of the medical field still leads the world in resolving the most complex conditions and provides the research that moves the survival of mankind forward. But they can't accommodate everyone.
As a last comment: I have seen and experienced the most abusive, substandard and outrageous nursing/tech conduct from men who came out of the military and into the private sector when nursing wages greatly increased, only because of the pay scale and open door. I hear you on that. I have observed it to my shock. Otherwise, I might not believe it. Their conduct is alien to any other behavior I've seen in my career.
I had satisfaction from my insurance company. I reported the doctor to UHC and Medicare for falsifying my medical billing to make me appear sicker on paper for increased reimbursements. He outright fabricated+ committed fraud. They withdrew payment for those claims. I also posted on health line + other Internet sites for rating doctors exactly what problems I experienced. I am going to submit a complaint to the State licensing board. I have added my corrections+ experience to my electronic medical records and I instructed this Dr that I prohibit him or his office from making his records available to any other medical entity other than insurance.
I am continuing remedies. It's not just for me. There needs to be accountability for the safety of others. This Dr has skills to help people. He just needs to have oversight and accountability to address the problems he also has.
I hope you find your way to resolution. It's a war out there, unfortunately. We're not in Kansas anymore, Toto.

Jump to this post

I was pre-med. I got into Cornell. My Dad's IQ was tested at 160. The whole family was in Mensa.

I can tell you, from direct contact with many high IQ people...that it is ZERO guarantee of morality.

John Gotti's IQ was tested at 145.

My wife's father was dying of brain cancer. They left him in a hallway, on a gurney, for 48 hours straight!!! They gave him the WRONG CANCER MEDICATION!!! The nurses did not attend to the bed rails and they let him fall out of bed TWICE.

And that is just one horror story of many.

I do also know many people who have gotten excellent EXCELLENT medical care, from wonderful people.

I live in New Jersey. I wonder if other areas of the country are just much better. When I interact with people from the South or the Midwest, they are clearly, far and away, much nicer and much more considerate people. So, maybe the extent of what I am experiencing comes from living in the NYC metro area. I don't know.

And yes, I am quite aware of people leaving the medical field. The son of my mother's friend left the field. He went into business. For him, it was a financial gain situation. But generally, I have heard of many medical people leaving the field because of how horrible medical practice is, generally.

Now, again, maybe this is a phenomenon related more to the NYC area, than the country generally. I don't know.

REPLY
@johnbishop

One of my greatest hopes is that the patient revolution will spread as fast as COVID did.

The Patient Revolution
https://www.patientrevolution.org/

Jump to this post

Thank you very much for this information. I cut and pasted it into a file. I will definitely look into this.

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@merpreb

@rsfcowgirl- Thank you for standing up for what is morally correct. But the problem with this is that most other doctors won't report other doctors. We can complain all we want but until doctors begin to help we don't have a lot of power. All we can do is complain and try and have someone notice.

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Yes, the hard truth. The white coat curtain of silence. Physician non- reporting of other physicians is core to the culture.
Even medical licensing boards don't take action against doctors unless something extremely eggregious and outrageous that shocks the public senses occurs.
One course of action is available: insurance company black listing. Individual insurance companies maintain a list of providers they will not refer to or reimburse, based on corrupt or substandard care. They look into complaints, monitor and de- list providers when their internal investigation and data confirm reports. They now also perform their own data farming looking at poor outcome statistics.
The failure in this watchdog option is due in part to patient inadequacy. First, patients don't contact the insurer. Second, when they do, they focus excessively on being treated rudely instead of the problem that the doctor ignored their complaints for 4 months and they later ended up ICU via ER (now called ED).
I now see that the collective consciousness is apparently changing and creating a grassroots movement. If Mayo Clinic - the internationally recognized gold standard - is talking about this, change is very possible.

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@samcal9977zz

Are there threads that discuss abuses by doctors?

I would like to discuss these difficulties and learn what people are doing to resolve these abuses. Seems like every doctor and every dentist I turn to has horrible office staff and a variety of abusive behaviors. By staff and sometimes by the doctors themselves.

It has been a very very difficult journey.

Thank you for listening.

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I fire them, complain to the Network admins in writing with specific instances, and requesting another provider.
In three years, I found a PCP on the third try. The first did not listen at all. The second ignored critical signs of chronic kidney disease. My present PCP, the third has helped me assess the renal status, including referral to urologist. Diagnostic testing in progress.
Similar for cardiologist, who winged it thru my appts, never answered my direct questions, dismissed my concerns, ...
I chatted with Network admins, and was referred to a wonderful physician as my cardiologist.
You need not merely accept uncaring treatment; nor dismissive communications which ignore or gloss over your questions and concerns.
Write a journal including reports and questions and answers . Take the journal with you to remind yourself of the questions, and to record the interactions.

REPLY
@samcal9977zz

I was pre-med. I got into Cornell. My Dad's IQ was tested at 160. The whole family was in Mensa.

I can tell you, from direct contact with many high IQ people...that it is ZERO guarantee of morality.

John Gotti's IQ was tested at 145.

My wife's father was dying of brain cancer. They left him in a hallway, on a gurney, for 48 hours straight!!! They gave him the WRONG CANCER MEDICATION!!! The nurses did not attend to the bed rails and they let him fall out of bed TWICE.

And that is just one horror story of many.

I do also know many people who have gotten excellent EXCELLENT medical care, from wonderful people.

I live in New Jersey. I wonder if other areas of the country are just much better. When I interact with people from the South or the Midwest, they are clearly, far and away, much nicer and much more considerate people. So, maybe the extent of what I am experiencing comes from living in the NYC metro area. I don't know.

And yes, I am quite aware of people leaving the medical field. The son of my mother's friend left the field. He went into business. For him, it was a financial gain situation. But generally, I have heard of many medical people leaving the field because of how horrible medical practice is, generally.

Now, again, maybe this is a phenomenon related more to the NYC area, than the country generally. I don't know.

Jump to this post

I appreciate the important point you made: IQ does not translate to moral behavior. I want you add to that: IQ does not equate to mental health. I think we want to see intelligence, integrity AND good mental health in our healthcare providers. I'm not describing perfection. But that was the old normal. We used to have that. I know what we longer see routinely.

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