1. < Caregivers: Dementia

Alzheimer's and DNR

Posted by gigi76 @gigi76, May 11, 2017

My husband is 65 with Alz symptoms for past 5-6 years. He had a heart attack in 2013 and last year, cardiac arrest with a pacemaker inserted. His short term memory, executive functioning and vocabulary have decreased a lot in the past year. However, he still is pleasant, can shower, dress himself and groom with reminders of the next step. He can't work anything mechanical. With his history of cardiac problems, I'm thinking about getting a DNR for him. I have Durable and Medical POA. I've talked to him about it, but I don't think he realizes that another cardiac event could be in the near future. As we all know, each one of these types of events makes them worse. He was diagnosed with Alz at Mayo and tried Aricept, but had severe GI reactions and was taken off due to early kidney disease. He's been through a lot medically in the past 10 years. Is it too early to be thinking about a DNR?

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Moderator
Colleen Young, Connect Director | @colleenyoung | Jul 10, 2017

Dearest, @macbeth. Thank you for finding the time to write to us. I had my suspicions that your silence was an indication of having your hands full and being run off your feet. As Scott has said many times, caring for a loved one is darn hard work. It takes its toll. I can only imagine how hard it is to sleep with him in the care of others and that your mind is constantly with him. But sleep would be so good to catch up on now while you can (in theory at least). I wonder if you might consider asking your doctor for a sleep aid to help you catch up. I'm not a medical professional. I suggest this only as a lay person. What I do know is that catching your breath and getting sleep if you can will help you be prepared for the next phase whatever it may bring.

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macbeth | @macbeth | Jul 10, 2017

@colleenyoung

Hey! Thanks for the suggestion! I had totally forgotten that I used to, occasionally, use melatonin, to help me sleep - just half of a 5 mg tab worked great for me. That's what I'll try again.

Macbeth

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Mentor
Teresa, Volunteer Mentor | @hopeful33250 | Jul 11, 2017
In reply to @macbeth "@hopeful33250 Well, they have not been helpful, but they have been emotionally supportive, verbally. I have..." + (show)
@macbeth

@hopeful33250

Well, they have not been helpful, but they have been emotionally supportive, verbally. I have also, through this, reconnected with some former co-workers and business people who have actually been more supportive than my friends and family (!).

After I pressed "send", I thought I should have signed it Macbeth The Miserable! At least I can grin a little at that!

Macbeth

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@macbeth I am glad that you have found some tangible support in the midst of this - even if it wasn't from the people you expected.
The fact that you can find a "grin" in the middle of this is a very good thing - blessings and peace! Teresa

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