Chronic Pain members - Welcome, please introduce yourself
Welcome to the new Chronic Pain group.
I’m Kelsey and I’m the moderator of the group. I look forwarding to welcoming you and introducing you to other members. Feel free to browse the topics or start a new one.
Why not take a minute and introduce yourself.
Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Chronic Pain Support Group.
@jimhd @faithwalker007 @lorirenee1 @sunnyflower
Please indulge me for a few random thoughts about the posts I have been reading here today:
Jim, I hope this new pain guy is located close to you, like in Bend. Let's hope he becomes the golden ticket you have been seeking, i.e. a normal good guy who will just prescribe what you need. Fingers crossed 🤞.
Renee, you have lived through hell with what you have faced. The fact that you have been so helpful to others on this site is a testament to how much you care for your fellow human beings. I find inhabiting this forum to be a very inspiring experience because of people like yourself.
Lori, you simply channel compassion. I think of all the huge and wonderful hearts I have come to know on Connect, yours might be the hugest. Such a sweet and loving compassion that you share with everybody who comes along here.
Sunny, I am glad you are here. When I saw your first post way back in May or so, I knew immediately that you were a very special person. For starters I had never, until that day, known someone who could have so many things wrong with them and still be functioanally literate. And yet, you are more than that. You are an articulate, highly intelligent, funny and warm lady. I love reading what you have to say, anywhere you say it. I'm sorry you are not appreciated enough by your family, but you are definitely appreciated here!
Sorry, I just wanted to tell each of you how much I appreciate knowing you all here. Best, Hank
Thx for your kind words Hank! Very sweet! Ditto to what you said about our friends! @faithwalker007.@lorirenee1 @jimhd 🤗🙏🌹😊
Oh Renee, this breaks my heart!!! Please know you are in my heart and prayers. Sunnyflower 🙏🌹
Jim, this doc sounds like a gift from God! A doctor who has severe pain and changes his career to help others in pain shows incredible compassion! We all want a doc like this!! I am so happy for you and hope and pray you like him.
I can't wait to hear how it goes. I am behind in my Mayo messages so you may have already answered.
Many blessings and warmest wishes, Sunnyflower
Thank you, Jim. It means a lot that you understand why I say the things I do. I never intend anything to hurt. If I ever do, please know it’s intentional, simply imparting wisdom or help in a rough existence we all share. Love in Christ, Renee
Hello @sunnyflower,
I read your post as well as Erika's, @erikas, response and I feel for both you and your daughters. I agree that involving a therapist would be a very good idea for you.
I also wonder if you have considered getting some help for your transportation and care needs from outside of your family on occasion? Perhaps a friend or your church or other county organization could provide some help assisting you? Having such help even one day a week might be a good thing.
Family members do not always have the physical or emotional capacity to care for someone who has chronic illnesses. Some outside help will often relieve that burden and help your family to understand that you care about their needs as well as your own.
Is this something you might discuss with your daughters?
@jesfactsmon Awww, Hank, thanks so much for what you have wrote about all of us. I just think I am a natural empath. How I am made. Don't really know if it is even appreciated but by one or two in my life. But I know you appreciate me, and all of us here. I am trying to think of what YOU are. You are almost like some sort of "gate keeper." You take it all that each of us say, you retain it, you learn from it, you help so much. And the astounding thing, is that you are here for your wife, but have given so much more!!!!! I sometimes marvel that you don't share our pain, but still choose to listen with all your soul. I would imagine you adore the intimacy of US. We really share here. The nitty gritty of life is expressed here, and that gives you closeness and it touches you. I just love you, Hank. You are one in a million. Linda is blessed having you. Lori
@faithwalker I am crying here. Your pain has made me so sad. I feel so for you. I just don't get this life of ours. I am just so sorry, Renee. Lori Renee
@sunnyflower Hi again, Sunny. I hear that your kids are so intensely busy with their own kids, jobs, etc. They actually do sound like extra special people. They are amazing, actually. For some reason, though, it just is not built into them to really help YOU. Are we wrong to think we deserve this? Is it like developmentally inappropriate to ask our kids to help? Is it NORMAL for them to mostly just attend to their own lives now? Perhaps, to some degree. I have a very dear Hindi girlfriend who has taught me so much about family through a Hindi perspective. In her Hindi culture, it is absolutely EXPECTED that children attend to their parents. If a parent needs help, they help. To top it off, my friend's kids help without being asked. They are attuned to their parents. They truly honor their parents. My girlfriend says that if she ever needs to live with one of her kids, it will just happen. She will be welcomed with grace. When she was in the hospital with cancer, her children stayed with her whenever they could. At some level, I think we raise spoiled kids, and we get taken for granted. I am so compassionate, that I would just naturally help. But many people are not like that at all. Because you gave your heart and soul as a mom, you would think it would be given back, at least to some degree. I don't know what the answer is. I have only one very busy son. Just had his second child, finishing grad school, a very intense job in pharmaceutical sales, and the kid barely says a word to me, ever. Did I raise him where he did not feel my love? Me? He had to feel it, cause, it's me. However, that is no guarantee of getting it back. We should not be loving in order to get it back, anyway. That does not seem right. I just do not know what the answer is. I just feel for you, sweet Sunny girl. You are like sunshine here. If I lived by you, I would help you as much as I could. Love to you, Lori
I’m grateful that we are not alone