A Very Good Article for Us Caregivers

@fran007. What a great article! I even subscribed to the newsletter. Fran, I think this article was talking to you. It was telling you that you needed to get help or leave the caregiving situation. And you did! You made the right decision for you and your friend. Maybe now, she’ll get the help she really needs. And no beating yourself up over the decision!
Are you becoming more comfortable with your decision? What will be your next steps?

in reply to @becsbuddy She does not know yet, but her sister does. Admittedly, I am a bit concerned because as far as I know there is no plan. I will continue doing what I have been doing until the end of the year, and then slowly transition away. This situation is so sad beyond belief, as my friend is always calling me, asking me to spend the night, and if I am too sick to eat dinner, she refuses to eat. I would not be surprised if she starves herself to death, and in all honesty, this would not necessarily be a bad thing at this point

@frran007. You might also notify the office for at risk elders. I think you can call the non-emergency police number to get the seniors at risk number.
This is a very , very sad situation. You have gone above and beyond, Fran. Don’t beat yourself up over the “what might happen if I leave” possibilities. When you are ready to leave, say something like “I’m going to leave now and you sister will be checking on you. Maybe I can visit sometimes.” You will need to be firm but kind.
Will you practice this at home a few times? It will make you stronger!

in reply to @becsbuddy I have had a complete mind change about my "taking off the hat," as I cannot in good conscience "abandon" someone who has been so influencing in my life for the past eleven years. At some point, "my hand will be forced" and at that point I know I will step away. When I asked CJ a few nights ago what she would do if I stopped coming over, her response was , "I cannot bear to think about it." So my decision to "carry on" has been made. I may not be able to go over to her apartment everyday, but I am unwilling to "let go" knowing full well that no one else will step in and help. It's just how I am, loyal to a fault.

in reply to @stinkeye Thank you.
I woke up to a voice mail that was left on my phone at 0043 by my friend CJ, She said she had fallen and was seeing double, and could I please call and check on her in the morning. I went over there at 0630 and woke her up, ensuring she was alert etc. Having her watch my finger move and things of that nature. No bump on her head, BUT she has horrible rib pain, and I suspect a fracture based upon my cursory "physical." I got her into her chair, gave her the last half of a pain pill she had from some dental surgery, along with Advil, food and an ice pack, admonishing her about not using the walker, although she promised to use it today. Texted the POA asking if she could please call and consider taking CJ for an x-ray which I will arrange later. Surprisingly, CJ relented about seeing the doctor as she is really in a lot of pain. I have an appointment myself this morning and will call her doctor when I get home. I do not expect any communication from the POA, and just got off the phone with CJ's sister, asking her to PLEASE call her. Oy vey, this has been the worst week for me in more ways than one, but the incident with CJ is really the easiest thing I have had to deal with. What gives?