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I don’t know what to do!! MIL diagnosed with Parkinsonism
I am a caregiver for my MIL. She was diagnosed with Parkinsonism. She also has incontinence issues. And has developed a constant cough. We went to the doctors they did a CT scan and found “no significant findings” but this cough won’t go away. It also produces a lot of phlegm. She doesn’t seem to be able to cough it up properly. She has recently started making this grunting noise. She does it 70% of the day. And she picks at her fingernails. What can be causing this? She seems to have lost interest in her hygiene. Then some days she seems “normal “ I am concerned there is something wrong but her bloodwork comes back fine her MRI was normal. Is there something else I can ask from the doctors? I wish I could post the video of her making this noise so you could understand what I mean. She isn’t humming a tune it’s grunting like after every breathe she takes….
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@mary71 Oh, Mary, I’m so sorry this happened! Can you tell us what happened? It might give a better idea of how to keep him safe. His doctors will talk about safety and you can ask to talk with the case manager/ social worker. If he is already home, you can call and ask to speak to a social worker. Make a list of concerns re: his safety. Car, lawn mower, his medications, cooking? Anything that you can remember that may have been a concern . I’m sure the other members will respond.
And, Mary, welcome to Mayo Clinic Connect. This discussion group is made up of many caring members.
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4 ReactionsI’m going to get philosophical here- you think about and do what you can to address safety and you remind yourself that whatever happens, you’ll figure out what to do, just like you’ve done your entire life.
It’s very important to understand and accept that he is losing the ability to reason, to accept reasoning, to be aware of his cognitive decline. If you continue to try to reason with him, you both will be very frustrated.
If he’s unsafe at the stove and determined to cook, be nearby and/or cheerfully offer to cook together, or hide the pots and pans until each time you need them, or unplug it and just decide to use the microwave. If he is leaving the house, buy the little childproof door alarms you place high up and you’ll be alerted. If he’s using power tools, slowly remove them (I put things in my car trunk). He’ll notice things changed or missing, be noncommittal, and he’ll soon be on to something else.
Time to think about home safety- remove throw rugs and move any floor clutter, have brighter light bulbs in the fixtures, install a higher toilet and grab bars (Amazon has nice ones under “decorator grab bars”). If wandering is a concern, make sure his wallet has a card with your full address and your cell number.
Driving is a whole other issue we Connect friends can help with if you need that.
Bottom line- address what you can, hope for the best, and remind yourself often that you have a whole life’s practice in problem-solving and you’ll figure out what to do quickly, if something drastic happens. Then relax, as best you can. You are the key to what is becoming a house of cards, and being less stressed about the “what ifs” will help you think more clearly and deal with what actually does happen.
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6 ReactionsForgot a few more things- make sure your smoke and carbon monoxide detectors are well-placed, have fresh batteries every six months, and no older than 10 years.
Buy or have a kitchen fire extinguisher, heck yearly to be sure the needle is currently in the green.
I had a talking smoke detector placed right above our bed (he would be up all hours at night)- it shouts a warning plus the alarm noise, figured that would get me up when my hearing aides were out.
AND I would remind myself that if he set the house on fire, we could get out and we have good homeowners insurance to start over with whatever.
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3 Reactions@centre Such good advice!
Thank you. This has become a new reality for me and I appreciate the information and support.
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2 ReactionsIt sounds like she is on the downward spiral of dementia which can occur very quickly if Parkinson's is in the mix. Some of what you are explaining could be dementia, hygiene, nail picking, forgetting how to cough, so the doctor will not find anything physically wrong with her.
Are you giving any consideration to placing her in a facility?
You are taking on a real challenge here. She will not get better, only worse. Dementia is a disease of the brain, it is dying. My stepmother is in MC she has FTD, each day brings a new challenge.
I wish you the best, remember this is your husband's family issue to resolve, don't burn yourself out.
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5 Reactions@teerae95, I'm tagging @hopeful33250 to see if she may shed some light on the possibility of this being a side effect of carbidopa-leodopa (Sinement).
How is your mother-in-law doing? How are you doing?
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1 ReactionShe is still making a humming noise. I talked to her neurologist he decided to go down in the dosage not because of her breathing but because it doesn’t seem to be helping her condition. However she seems to change more over time. She is not like herself at all. We do have some upcoming appointments so I will keep mentioning it. I’m doing fine thank you for asking. I just got over this awful cold.
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